The Fun Police are invading my game
By spud murphy, 23 Jul 2008 spud murphy is a Roar Rookie
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- Force, Melbourne Storm, Rugby League, Storm
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I had a dream last night that that I was watching a great game of rugby league, just like in the good old days. I must have been reminiscing of a time before passion was outlawed, and refereeing was pseudo-political.
I was happy, content, almost melancholy.
But like a lot of the ‘good dreams’, this one soon turned pear-shaped.
I vaguely remember dreaming that a front-row forward had rather softly toe-poked an opposing front rower in the shin and been sent off.
Dreams, aren’t they silly sometimes? Or so i thought.
Stay with me, this is where it gets scary.
I awoke at about 10pm and had the strangest feeling that my home had been invaded whilst I slept. In attempting to put the pieces together, the words ‘Fun Police’ kept running through my mind.
Fun Police. There’s no such thing, surely?
Anyway, at the breakfast table this morning my wife asked me strangest thing, “did you enjoy the footy last night?”
‘Cue music from Psycho’.
It was then that I realised that I had not been asleep at all, but had drifted into a rage induced coma during the Storm-Dragons game, and that the ‘Fun Police’ do exist and had invaded living rooms all across the country.
I needed to know more, so i googled ‘Fun Police. And this is what I discovered.
The ‘Fun Police’ are a miserable bunch, to be eligible you must pass an array of stringent Party-Pooper tests. It is a prerequisite that you have a proven history of feeling inadequate (school reports, ex-wives).
Unlike most real Police Officers, the ‘Fun Police Officer’ is a highly-trained thief, skilled in robbing you of your happiness and enjoyment. The more you enjoy something, the harder they will come after you.
The rugby league branch are the ‘Special Forces of the Fun Police’. They are the elite, the best of the best. Their primary function is to strip the game of its fans.
Operation P.I.C.K – or PICK as it is known to some in the taskforce – specifically targets Passion, Individuality, Continuity and Kicking in the shins.
Without their interference rugby league would be too enjoyable. It might even survive the ‘war of the codes’.
So for your own piece of mind, and for the sake of the game, stop displaying your enjoyment immediately!
And maybe, just maybe, they won’t notice what a great game it is and leave it the hell alone.
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