The Beijing Olympics: wake me when it’s over
Roar Guru
By Pippinu, 24 Jul 2008 Pippinu is a Roar Guru
I’m not the least bit excited about the Olympics. Is it because of the preponderance of absurd sports and pursuits about which ordinarily no one gives a damn?
Is it that, apart from athletics, it has the sniff of wealthy whites beating up on the rest of the world?
Is it because Australia would bother with the zippy suit when its only competition in the pool is the US?
Is it because the war on drugs reminds one of the war on terror?
Is it because it no longer rates as an event for true sports lovers?
Is it because millions of taxpayers’ money gets wasted on preparing “athletes” for events that normally we wouldn’t frequent even if they were for free?
Is it all of the above?
At the risk of labouring the point, allow me to focus on a handful of Olympic events that pretty much explain the boredom factor:
Archery
There is one positive to archery, and that is that like lawn bowls in the Commonwealth games, no matter what one’s age and general athletic ineptitude, it provides us with hope that we may yet represent our country at something half meaningful. The main problem with archery is that it is half meaningful and about as spectator-friendly as shooting, yachting, fencing and modern pentathlon (the latter looking decidedly 19th century).
Badminton
There should be a blanket ban on events that remind one of the immediate aftermath of a childhood Christmas. Add to this category totem tennis, table tennis, backyard cricket, Hookie and beach volleyball.
Synchronised Swimming
Now I like looking at women with lots of make up prancing around in swimsuits as much as the next bloke, but I draw the line at watching them shoot out of the water with the sort of gruesome grins that one associates with Boris Karloff. Add to that that I simply detest any event requiring marking by judges, which accounts for over half of the Olympic games.
Greco-Roman Wrestling
Being of Sicilian descent, I consider myself to be the archetypal Greco-Roman. Hell, I’d even put a busted up column in my backyard if I could find one. But I’m also a big fan of leaving things in their correct millennium (although a return to having athletes compete in the nude would be a welcome development).
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Spiro Zavos said | July 24th 2008 @ 9:21am | Report comment
Pippinu makes a very valid point in this Roar of the Crowd. Synchronised swimming came into the Los Angeles Olympics as a sort of gift to Esther Williams, a star who was big in water movies which featured synchronised swimming. Most of the action takes place below the water and the swimmers have pegs on their noses – in my opinion, more as a sign of the merit of the ‘sport’ rather than to help them survive in the under-water part of their routine.
The modern pentathlon is another meaningless sport. It is supposed to feature a day in the life of a cavalry officer in the 19th century. Someone should tell the IOC we are now in the 21st century.
Redb said | July 24th 2008 @ 10:39am | Report comment
Pippu,
Good article. Good to hear from you.
Apart from the velodrome cycling the Olympics holds little interest.
Redb
Rabbitz said | July 24th 2008 @ 11:07am | Report comment
Well now this is an interesting comment. I believe that the Olympics is over-rated and over bloated as a spectacle. Will I watch it? Probably not as I detest watching swimming and athletics. As these two make up 90% of the broadcasts it doesn’t leave much to watch.
Another thought that struck me is the way certain sports were dismissed in the article and comments, frankly I would like swimming, athletics and velodrome riding removed as they are so tedious. I do like to watch the Archery and the Shooting (having been a competitor in both over the years). I guess one man’s meat is another man’s poison!!
Dump the lot, that way we avoid the whole argument.
Pippinu said | July 24th 2008 @ 11:22am | Report comment
Spiro, Redb and Rabbitz – thanks very much for your thoughtful comments.
The thing about the athletics part of the programme is that a wide range of countries are able to compete on an almost level-playing field – something that can’t be said of swimming, cycling, triathlon, sailing, gymnastics etc. (although, I have to admit I don’t mind the cat and mouse plays of some of the velodrome events).
But re being a spectator at the archery and shooting – I can’t help thinking you might be in a minority there Rabbitz!!
Speaking of which, I wonder if my mum has kept that archery kit she bought for me one christmas decades ago – I might make the Olympics yet!
Slippery Jim said | July 24th 2008 @ 11:25am | Report comment
You’re right, Pippinu, we should lobby to introduce totem tennis and hookey to the games. I’m not sure nudity would enhance the viewing pleasures of, say, the russian womens hurling event, however.
Many of the sports like archery and fencing strike me as a lot more fun to actually perform in than they are to watch…great article, ny the way, and I hope it is the first of many.
Redb said | July 24th 2008 @ 11:31am | Report comment
Pippu,
Actually a day at the track and field is not bad value for money. Having attended both the Sydney olympics and Melb Comm games, the track and field always provided something of interest with great variety as the field events are often conducted whilst athletes raced around the track. I guess TV struggles with this multiple sports action though. javelin, hammer throw can be quite spectacular live.
Redb
Rabbitz said | July 24th 2008 @ 11:37am | Report comment
Pippinu,
I agree that watching Archery and Shooting, may to some seem boring, but there is the the point. I don’t. I find that the few seconds of interesting bits in swimming vs the hours of coverage is boring. I realise that some like it. Incidentally, attendances at shooting World Cups (especially in Europe) are quite well attended.
As for level playing fields and athletics I don’t really believe that Equatorial Guinea is on a level field with say the USA or China.
If the whole olympic sports carnival vanished I wouldn’t actually lose any sleep. (I guess that makes me un-Australian!) Despite having (unfounded) aspirations at one time.
Pippinu said | July 24th 2008 @ 11:43am | Report comment
Redb
I saw a day of track and field when Canberra hosted the Athletics World Championships back in 1985 and I have to admit that I thoroughly enjoyed it. I too was attracted to the variety of stuff happening.
I also recall watching the East German women’s relay team smash the world record. I know that they have since been discredited many times over – but to witness their technique and smooth action that day, like clockwork, was one of the sporting highlights of my life (in complete contrast to the balls up we saw in the Australian women’s relay team some years ago when they failed to make the first baton change).
Rabbitz
certainly with you regarding the Olympics as a whole.
Towser said | July 24th 2008 @ 11:59am | Report comment
What suprises me after 40 years in Australia, is that you are always under an impression from the media(print or electronic) that all Australians pump out their chest when the Olympics are on (regardless of the event)as a chance for the Aussie battler sports hero to shove it to the world.
This article and responding posts seem to contradict this view.
This article to me asks the question to what extent is the Australian public lead by the media as to what is relevant to Australia & Australians.
jimbo said | July 24th 2008 @ 12:15pm | Report comment
Yes, every time the Olympics come around I don’t get too excited and don’t plan to watch any of it.
But then when it was in Sydney you just had to go along and watch something and the anticipated Cathy Freeman race and watch the football final, even the football playoff for third place on TV . . .
. . . then there was the hockeyroos gold medal game in Athens and . . .
Yeah, I’m going to avoid the Beijing Olympics as I always do, unless something interesting is on.
I can’t help myself, I’m just an addicted sports junkie.