Caution needed by moral police
Roar Guru By Steve Kaless, 15 May 2009 Steve Kaless is a Roar Guru
- Tagged:
- Matthew Johns, NRL, Rugby League, sex in sport
Sydney, June 25, 2004. The footy Show's Reg Reagan, the alter-ego of ex-rugby league player Matthew Johns, meets a young look-a-like during a DVD signing at Sydney's Virgin Mega Store. AAP Image/Dean Lewins
Fear not Mums and Dads, your loyal moral protectors of the government and media are here once again to save the day. Forget global warming, financial crisis or even Peter Andre breaking up with Jordan.
Nope, people seem fascinated by the goings on in player’s bedrooms, which is slightly ironic given this whole saga started by people watching the goings on in other player’s bedrooms.
But this issue seems to have morphed into the debate over we need some sort of moral code for our sportsman above and beyond the criminal laws of the land.
The dreaded term “Role Model” has cropped up about one thousand times.
Role models for me is about out-sourcing morality. Given Australians’ incredible appetite for pornography there must certainly have been some parents who have spoken out against Johns only to then watch similar acts on their home PC when their kids were tucked up safely in bed.
As I have argued before I have no problem with players being prosecuted if they have broken the law, but this new morality code seems to be verging on bizarre.
What is more I’ll argue that we are going down a pretty dangerous path by trying to include some sort of clause in a player’s contract which states that they must not be morally questionable when behind closed doors.
I’m not contract lawyer, but I reckon it could be tricky.
First no going out in Kings Cross, then no drinking and now no sex which mums and dads might find off putting even if all parties were consensual.
I’m not condoning non-consensual sexual violence, but here is the rub. Group sex is not abuse.
As off putting as it sounds, group sex happens. Some people are into it. Men are into it, women are into it.
Personally, it has never floated my boat. The thought of seeing any of my mates going at it hammer and tong is more likely to make me join the priesthood and give the game away than take a number. But horses for courses.
I’ve spoken with rugby league players who have known it has gone on in their clubs, I’ve spoken with rugby union players who have also concurred.
I’ve spoken to soldiers, you know the blokes we all call heroes on ANZAC Day, who have had far more grimey tales than any of the aforementioned athletes.
And I’ve also spoken to women who liked the idea (I wasn’t propositioning them at the time, as I said it’s not my bag).
So while commentators and politicians have all spoken motherhood statements like “let’s all unite against abuse” and referred to the fact that no one would ever consent to it they’ve missed the point.
They are wrong, people do.
Maybe that is where things get messy, and the lines blurred.
The women who have commented openly on the topic all seem to have the perspective of the mother speaking about their daughter: “she’d never do it.” If only it were that simple.
Liberal MP Pru Goward made a number of comments this week.
“Risky sexual behaviour doesn’t lead to a white wedding.”
There would surely have been more than a few feminists up in arms at a comment which seemed to imply all women are after a white wedding and toss in a picket fence and domestic duties for good measure.
Maybe not everyone is into white weddings, but just their version of a good time.
Goward also remarked “if there is a young woman in Australia who doesn’t know that having sex with one or two men at once is not risky sexual behaviour she perhaps needs to go back and look at a bit more television.”
Eh? Surely a leading female politician could have better advice than watching some more Bondi Vet or the Biggest Loser.
If you were confused by that opinion then reading the Herald’s Miranda Devine hardly made things clearer.
Devine argued on behalf of all women that “it would be a rare woman who would willingly consent to any experience like that without being damaged in some way.”
No wonder these athletes need education courses.
First no meant no, but now yes might mean no later on down the track.
Politicians aren’t really interested in solutions to these perceived social problems, they are too complex, they just want to sound like they do.
Like the Greens Sarah Hanson-Young who wants a “universal code of conduct” to foster “respectful relationships”.
“Respectful relationship” being what exactly? Do players who get divorced face having their contract torn up? Sounds like classic political hollow rhetoric.
But from reading a lot of the material floating a round in cyberspace, a lot of the anger towards players seems to stem from a sort of envy.
You can sense an anger. These blokes are just dumb footballers, it is not right that they get all the girls and the attention.
Others seem to think it is all justice because they don’t find the Footy Show funny.
Funny how many people feel the need to refer to footballers as stupid, I’ve spoken to plenty and they always seem to come across as more intelligent than great swathes of the population.
Because they have never come close to experiencing the adulation that athletes get they don’t seem to believe the stories of what goes on. It is like “If I have to club them over the head, then so must they.”
From the dawn of time, people have found fame attractive and have indulged those with it.
JFK, Pele, Magic Johnson, George Best, were all exceedingly talented men but whose bedroom antics might not have been one for grandma.
So here is my advice.
To the administrators, you can pour as much money as you want into education to attempt to present a sanitised view of the world to sponsors and families, but you will always get someone who likes something a bit weird between the sheets.
To the players, you can do what you want so long as it is within the law (and let’s face it most things are) and you are positive everyone is as keen to be there as you.
And to the women, if you don’t like what they are saying or offering…..knee them in the balls.
Now bring on the footy… which isn’t actually going too badly given you have a sold out ground for the first time since 2002.
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- Explore:
- Matthew Johns, NRL, Rugby League, sex in sport
May 15th 2009 @ 9:16am
Jameswm said | May 15th 2009 @ 9:16am | Report comment
Sorry Steve
Your article is based on the premise that everything that went on in that bedroom was consensual, including players climbing through windows to get in, and masturbating while watching.
It also neglects the idea of not just being unfaithful, but being unfaithful while your mates watch, and letting them go next. It ignores the lesson Johns taught the other players about being on tour with a bunch of blokes, and the acceptance of an absence of self-control.
The article makes some valid points, but that suspect premise taints the whole article.
I’m with Mick of Newie. And Tom, whose comments are a lot more insightful than the original article, which is too superficial.
May 15th 2009 @ 9:23am
Siren's Call said | May 15th 2009 @ 9:23am | Report comment
Tom – there’s the thing – we’re taking an instance from 2002 and treating it as if it happened last weekend and judging the behaviour on the height set by today’s moral crusaders.
How could any of those Sharks players have known in that 2002 private affair what ethical and moral judgement would passed upon them publically in 2009?
How could Matthew Johns in 2002 have forseen the expectation placed upon him in 2009 when he hadn’t even yet begun or even maybe contemplated his media career?
Judge him if you must, but do it as a 30 year old footballer and not a 37 media personality who owes some wider obligation to the community.
May 15th 2009 @ 9:24am
mIckeym said | May 15th 2009 @ 9:24am | Report comment
It seems that there is usually two sides to a story. It’s good to finally read some intelligent rather than emotional response to what has come out.
What I still don’t understand:
1. Why did “Clare” wait 7 years to make this public? Has she recently lost a job, and needs some quick cash?
2. Why do her workmates at the time report that the next day, she came in boasting of her exploits? And continued boasting for the next few days.
3. Why was it that 5 days after the event (after she learnt who it was she bonked), that she then went to the police (who investigated her claims and dismissed them)?
4. Why is her identity being protected? Like the posting stuff on the net, people who have the advantage of anonymity, without the risk of cross examination, can be more bold with their statements.
5. On that note, why hasn’t Tracey Grimshaw been given the opportunity to put “Clare” through the wringer, grilling her to get to the bottom of her version of the “Truth”, rather than the sympathetic interview done by 4 Corners?
I’m yet to decide if I’m for or against John’s in this instance, because I’m yet to hear the full story.
It would be easy to jump to conclusions, and believe everything I’ve read, but I might just leave it a week or two until a fuller picture is available…
May 15th 2009 @ 9:26am
sheek said | May 15th 2009 @ 9:26am | Report comment
Steve,
Some points. It’s a woman’s prerogative to sleep with as many men as she chooses. She might say yes to two, but that doesn’t mean another dozen can “truck & tralier”. This is the part that a lot of young footballers struggle to understand.
Whether the woman in question is playing ‘ducks & drakes’ with the incident is irrelevant to two other points – firstly, Matty Johns cheated on his wife, in what has transpired to be a rather pathetic way, & secondly, as a senior player he should have exerted more influence on the night’s events.
Football players will continue to be propositioned. And I say to the young bucks, as long as it’s consentual, go for it. But the message for his team mates is this – if he got lucky, & she’s agreed to have sex with him, this isn’t an open invitation for every other team mate.
The media hasn’t helped, but let’s not shift the blame either. I rarely agree with much of what Gus Gould says. But last night on the footy show (which I rarely watch), I thought he was excellent & to the point.
I admire the way Matty Johns has stood up to be counted. He hasn’t shied away from his own wrongdoing in the affair. He’s taken his medicine like a man.
Unlike his so called team “mates” from that night, who continue to hide in the shadows like the slime they are, letting Matt take all the hits. Who knows, if they bothered to come forward, we might get a clearer picture of what occurred.
May 15th 2009 @ 9:27am
Siren's Call said | May 15th 2009 @ 9:27am | Report comment
And once we’ve “outed” the Sharks players, what will the media do then? Will their appetite be fully met or will they then demand that the Bulldogs from 2004 fess up too? And then what? Start on the other football codes and cricket? How about a full audit of Australian sport from 1960 to today?
May 15th 2009 @ 9:33am
Tom said | May 15th 2009 @ 9:33am | Report comment
Siren, 2002 wasn’t the middle ages. I don’t think standards have really changed much at all since then. Maybe they should have.
And I do judge Johns as a 30 year old player. Thats why I started my post by calling him a 30 year old player.
As it happens though, he’d been in the media through the Footy Show quite a bit prior to 2002.
May 15th 2009 @ 9:39am
Redb said | May 15th 2009 @ 9:39am | Report comment
it is pointless laying the blame at the girl and attempting to so the same thing to her that the media have done to Johns. She ahs no iamge to protect, no game to run no heartsandmidns to retaina dw in over.
Whilst rugby league fans concentre on demonising a silly but tragic 19 year old girl, the NSW Catholic schools system (147 of them) are questioning their involvement with rugby league and its players.
The more you vilify the girl the deeper the resentment in other parts of society who aren’t blind to rugby league’s culture problems and it’s lack of recognition for change amongst the clubs and it’s fans.
Redb
May 15th 2009 @ 9:41am
Siren's Call said | May 15th 2009 @ 9:41am | Report comment
Good Tom. So explain why this incident was reported in 2002 on Channel nine news and the other tv news and the back page of the Telegraph and nothing much happens. There was apparently a “victim” in 2002 but seems no one cared. Then it comes back in 2009 with no new evidence uncovered and we all want a public lynching.
All I can see that is different is that Four Corners somehow were able to portray a 2002 incident as the latest incident in a line that began in 2004.
May 15th 2009 @ 9:46am
Siren's Call said | May 15th 2009 @ 9:46am | Report comment
That’s funny Redb. If the NRL has to educate young men on morals doesn’t that say something about our schools?
May 15th 2009 @ 9:46am
Eamonn said | May 15th 2009 @ 9:46am | Report comment
Bit simplistic Steve, and the number of incidents suggest something a tad more disturbing than even the Cronulla incident.
Sexual abuse is rife in Australia. League and other sports have a high profile and surely these type of incidents hardly help promote chances of a better society. The message coming through to our young people time and time again is important in my view..if not yours.
Your advice is way too simplistic, and rife with danger for the young men, the women and the game of Rugby League.
Would you want your son or daughter involved in the Cronulla incident. Your son presumably following your advice and after receiving consent. from the women involved….don’t make me laugh….seven years later he is running scared whatever the rights and wrongs…great advice Steve!! How do you think your son would feel this week?
I think we need a slightly more educated response than women “knee them in the balls,” boys, “you can do anything you want within the law,”
Did you really mean that? or you might have said “anything you want that you can get away with” probably amounts to the same thing doesn’t it.
Stick to writing about the game Steve, seems to me just because you are an expert sports writer…what qualificaitions do you have to giving out advice on such a delicate subjcct…clearly from the advice you give above I’d be terrified of any young League player walking into a club and hearing.
Today we’ve got the Kaless model to work on! Good grief…we’re talking about sexual abuse here Steve, our young men and women deserve much better information than the Kaless model at the local leagues club!