By Andrew Jones
June 24th 2009 @ 12:40am
Related coverage
The Top 5 Jailbirds In Sport
Greg Bird in action during the NRL Round 24, Cronulla-Sutherland Sharks v Sydney Roosters match at Toyota Stadium, on Friday, August 22, 2008. AAP Image/Action Photographics, Grant Trouville
It’s a hotly contested Top 5 this week as we take a look at sportspeople who have lost the plot during their careers to such an extent that they’ve landed themselves in jail. There are many unworthy candidates, so I’ve stuck to one per sport. I welcome your additions and suggestions.
1. Greg Bird (c)
Demonstrated that he was a complete tool early in his career when he kneed Souths player Shane Marteene in the head for no reason as he was getting up to play the ball. Ironically, his suspension was actually shortened to 10 weeks owing to his then clean record.
Bird then proved this conduct was no fluke by earning five charges of common assault against a woman in a Cronulla nightclub – straight to the Nitespots XI for Fusions! – and then glassing his attractive but apparently idiotic girlfriend (how long would a game of Connect 4 take in the Bird house, I wonder?) and trying to pin the blame on his absent flatmate.
In a further twist, celebrity shadowboxer Tony Zappia was mooted as a defence witness in the first case – perhaps the court feels he has some expertise in the field….
2. O.J. Simpson
It takes a big effort to get the NFL spot in this team, with luminaries such as Michael Vick (running a dog-fighting ring) and 6-time Pro Bowler Nate Newton (being caught twice within 5 weeks with a combined total of 388 pounds – a Refrigerator Perry’s worth – of marijuana in his car) pushing hard for places.
But it’s just too hard to go past The Juice. Not for his murderous double touchdown – I dimly recall he escaped jail for that – but for his point after attempt robbing a Las Vegas store at gunpoint. I mean, who commits a crime after beating the rap in the Trial of the Century?
That’s basically breaking into prison. More importantly, who in their right mind would rob a sports memorabilia store – isn’t there enough Genuine Sports Craporama out there that you don’t need to steal it?
3. Navjot Singh Sidhu
Those who enjoyed the Punjabi opener’s assault on Shane Warne in the March 1998 Border-Gavaskar mismatch, spare a thought for then 65 year-old Gurnam Singh, who was bludgeoned to death by Sidhu in 1988 in a road rage incident.
With a cricket bat no less.
Sidhu technically shouldn’t be in this team, as he wasn’t found guilty until December 2006 (not that sports stars get special treatment!) and is still appealing his sentence. However, I would not like his reputation as an interesting, if eccentric commentator, to overshadow the fact that he was guilty of a vicious and deadly assault. He is also shameless, having twice been elected to the Indian parliament, once after being found guilty.
4. Marion Jones
It takes a special effort to go from triple Olympic gold medallist to inmate, especially without stealing anything or assaulting anyone.
However, Jones managed the feat by lying to U.S. federal agents investigating BALCO, the Gen X athlete’s chemist of choice. Jones was stripped of her medals too, although she did win gold in the non-IOC sanctioned Short Track Self-Immolation.
5. Mike Tyson
The sociopath picks himself. And bites his ear off.
For more on the NFL candidates, see The Phat Phree. Well worth a read, and where I got the Nate Newton story from.
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(28)
Moneypenny said | June 24th 2009 @ 9:42am | Report comment
Wouldn’t Richard Loe also be hotly contesting the ear biting spot from Tyson? Still, I suppose Mr Loe hasn’t yet been convicted of sexual assault. Or had a new movie released about him. Or made a cameo in another new release movie – that’s some hangover all right.
I saw Tyson as he was coming out of the central courthouse in NY during his trial – he’s very very scary.
Tom said | June 24th 2009 @ 10:28am | Report comment
Former AFL player Andrew Krakeour is currently in jail for assault, and apparently his prison team is causing a few problems.
http://www.news.com.au/perthnow/story/0,21598,25630576-2761,00.html
Apparently in one game four opponents had to be taken to hospital.
Hmm.
Eamonn said | June 24th 2009 @ 10:39am | Report comment
Fair go for football…we even missed out on this category…bias I say:)
Finno said | June 24th 2009 @ 11:18am | Report comment
Wasnt it Tyson who said after someone commented that he was a psychopathic rapist,
he replied ‘Im no psychopath’
onside said | June 24th 2009 @ 1:36pm | Report comment
Q. Who was the last West Indian to ride a derby winner?
A .Lestor Piggots cell mate
(Lestor Piggot was a famous English jockey who
got caught for tax evasion and spent time in gaol).
Alex said | June 24th 2009 @ 1:36pm | Report comment
Joey Barton would have to be in there. Spent more time in prison or suspended than actually playing for Newcastle…
onside said | June 24th 2009 @ 1:43pm | Report comment
Tom,
The game may have been umpired by once top AFL whistleman Harry Beitzel ,who
in 1994 was sentenced to eighteen months in the slammer for financial scullduggery
onside said | June 24th 2009 @ 1:50pm | Report comment
In 1982 ,Harry M Miller who currently represents many high
profile sports people spent 8 months in Long Bay for fraud.
Hoy said | June 24th 2009 @ 4:17pm | Report comment
Didn’t the greatest of all time, Ali, go to jail? not quite in those 5 people’s league for skullduggery, but maybe worth an honourable mention?
Big Steve said | June 24th 2009 @ 5:03pm | Report comment
OJ was trying to steal his own sporting memorabilia.
I’m not sure if that makes it better or worse?
Mick of Newie said | June 24th 2009 @ 5:10pm | Report comment
Bit obscure,
but didn’t Con Boutsianis (Sth Melbourne) do time for armed robbery.
How about Nathan Baggerly, Scott Miller, Mark Catchpole. Admittedly all convicted after sporting career (or conviction brought it to a premature end).
Art Sapphire said | June 24th 2009 @ 5:19pm | Report comment
NFL Quarterback Michael Vick is doing time for staging illegal dog fights.
Campbell said | June 24th 2009 @ 5:20pm | Report comment
Wanye Carey surly deserves a spot – he has technically spent time in jail, a night in 2004 in Las Vegas.
What a tosser! Might have been a great footballer but certainly scrapes the barrel bottom as a person:
- shags best mates wife
- leaves pregnant wife 6 weeks before their child is born
- sexually assaults woman by grabbing her breast
- beats up girlfriend
- glasses another girlfriend
- assaults police officers, some female
Nice bloke eh?
Art Sapphire said | June 24th 2009 @ 5:38pm | Report comment
Joey Barton – pathological violent nutjob.
from Wiki.
“His career and life have been marred by numerous controversial incidents and disciplinary problems, and he has been convicted twice on charges of violence. On 20 May 2008 he was sentenced to six months imprisonment for common assault and affray during an incident outside a McDonald’s restaurant in Liverpool City Centre. Barton served 77 days of this prison term, being released on 28 July 2008.On 1 July 2008 he was also given a four months suspended sentence after admitting assault occasioning actual bodily harm on former teammate Ousmane Dabo during a training ground dispute. This incident effectively ended his Manchester City career. Three days after his release, he was charged with violent conduct by The FA for the assault on Ousmane Dabo. In 2004, he was also involved in an incident where he stubbed out a cigar onto the eyes of reserve team player Jamie Tandy during a Manchester City Christmas party at Lucid nightclub. This resulted in permanent scarring for the victim although luckily his vision was to return to normal.”
His half brother Michael is currently doing time for this horror.
From the Guardian 01/12/2005
“Cousins jailed for racist axe murder”
Two cousins were today sentenced for life for the racist axe murder of black teenager Anthony Walker.
Paul Taylor, 20, who drove an ice axe into the 18-year-old student’s head, must serve at least 23 years and eight months of his mandatory life sentence. Taylor’s 17-year-old cousin Michael Barton, brother of the Manchester City footballer Joey Barton, must serve a minimum of 17 years and eight months for the murder in Huyton, Merseyside, in July.
Sentencing the pair at Preston crown court, sitting in Liverpool, Mr Justice Leveson said they had carried out a “terrifying ambush” and a “racist attack of a type poisonous to any civilised society”.
Barton, who initiated the confrontation and supplied the axe, was yesterday convicted of the murder. Taylor admitted murder on November 15, just before he was about to go on trial.
Today, sentencing the pair, the judge told them: “You took from Anthony Walker his most precious possession, that is to say his life and all it held for him. He was a young man of enormous promise, lost in a moment.
“You have damaged forever the lives of those who loved him. Further, you have destroyed your own lives and affected the lives of all who are dear to you.”
Ian Jessup said | June 24th 2009 @ 10:24pm | Report comment
If memory serves me right the rugby league-playing brothers of Allan Langer and Mal Meninga both did time in Boggo Road for murder, as did fellow Bronco Smokin Joe Kilroy for dope running.
Steve Randell the cricket umpire went down for touching kids.
Dennis Pittard, dual Rothmans Medal winner from the early 1970s, went to jail for embezzling, as did former Test legspinner Terry Jenner, who went on to become Shane Warne’s mentor.
What about Tim Cahill’s brother? John Elias? the Aussie jockey in Hong Kong recently?
Knives Out said | June 24th 2009 @ 10:43pm | Report comment
Rather bizarre anecdote here: my best friend’s sister’s best friend was dating Cahill’s brother a few years ago. My best friend’s sister is around 5 or 6 years older than my friend and I (who are the same age – 24 now). At the ages of 16/17 (can’t recall) my friend’s sister and her friends took my mate and I out for one of our first drinks at a local pub (O’Neills) in Bromley, SE London. Cahill’s brother turned up, absolutely off his head, and proceedeed to try and growl at absolutely everyone in the pub, which in itself struck me as silly because Bromley is a bit of a rough house and he wasn’t a particularly menacing man. Anyway, having failed to get beaten up by anybody in the pub he then turned on my friend and I (whenever his gf was out of shot) and proceeded to threaten us and generally ‘playfully’ push us around. Obviously, at the end of the night at chucking out he really did his best to look for more trouble but was safely bundled out of the pub by the bouncers. I recall thinking he was a bit of an idiot trying to intimidate a pair of kids until I was informed by my best frined that he had been caught trying to kick seven shades of decency off some poor guy’s head. Turns out he wasn’t an idiot, just a scumbag. I imagine he’s getting his just desserts in jail.
Ian Jessup said | June 25th 2009 @ 9:06pm | Report comment
Add the cyclist Gary Neiwand (AVO by wife), former North Melb AFL star David Dench (fraud), nathan baggaley (kayak), Kevin Humphreys (NSWRL boss),
ohtani's jacket, said | June 25th 2009 @ 10:52pm | Report comment
Not a sportsman, but Don King is an interesting twist on this considering he became one of the most successful promoters in boxing history after serving time for second degree murder (later reduced to nonnegligent manslaughter.) Stomped an employee to death who owed him money. This was during his illegal bookingmaking days. Thirteen years earlier, he’d shot a guy in the back who was trying to rob his gambling house, but it was determined to be justifiable homicide.
Has to be one of the greatest crooks in the history of sport.
Knives Out said | June 25th 2009 @ 11:16pm | Report comment
An interesting parallel is Frank Warren, Ohtani, who despite never going to jail was an illegal bookmaker and trainer to ilegall bare knuckle boxers in his youth, and is related to English gangsters. Warren was also shot a few years ago.
Mick Gold Coast QLD said | June 26th 2009 @ 2:12am | Report comment
Ian Jessup names Dennis Pittard – he was our school captain when I was about half way through high school.
Cannot forget Paul Hayward – tough nut Newtown Bluebags five eighth and capable amateur boxer banged up in Thailand for life-ish, for drug running, in the late ’70s. He was let out in the late ’80s and died a couple of years later from something nasty he picked up whilst in the slammer.
Lots of rumours when he got caught about being a courier for well known Sydney media people but it turned out he was Neddy Smith’s brother in law and probably got dobbed in by rival crooks to Neddy’s business interests.
I don’t think he made it to 40.
Nipper said | August 30th 2009 @ 11:21am | Report comment
Ali was never in jail. He was arrested for “draft evasion” during Vietnam, when he refused to serve as a conscientious objector. But he was never imprisoned.
Also, I believe that OJ didn’t hold up a store, but threatened memorabilia dealers in a Vegas hotel room.
Matt S said | September 26th 2009 @ 10:21am | Report comment
Ian Jessup, pull your head in, what does the jailing of a sportsman’s brother have to do with this article?
I would add Albert Proud of the Brisbane Lions for his conviction for assaulting & glassing two women earlier this year but he got off jail time and went straight back to playing AFL.
We could soon add the Essendon player for punching & kicking an Indian taxi driver or does the spectator that knocked out a junior AFL player with a mallet count?
True Tah said | September 26th 2009 @ 10:37am | Report comment
Didnt Les Mara get jailed in southeast Asia for drug trafficking?
Johnny Elias did time as well.
cuzybros cuz said | November 25th 2009 @ 12:08pm | Report comment
Greg bird has just had his case quashed. Free man. who will he sign with????? Roosters or Bunnies???
http://news.ninemsn.com.au/national/975624/greg-bird-walks-free
Dogs Of War said | November 25th 2009 @ 12:16pm | Report comment
Bunnies can’t afford him with the talent they brought in (get your money on the Bunnies to win the comp, and for top 4). Roosters for sure, they love buying 5/8th’s, halfbacks and locks. Never thinking about where do you actually play them.
cuzybros cuz said | November 25th 2009 @ 12:19pm | Report comment
rumour mill is already spinning around town. SMS from friend says Tigers are keen. see what happens
Jim Wilson said | December 31st 2009 @ 1:07pm | Report comment
This Queensland country rugby union player:
http://www.dailyliberal.com.au/news/local/news/general/rapist-jailed/1249406.aspx
westy said | February 5th 2010 @ 8:03pm | Report comment
Dangers of mere opinion. I am as guilty as anyone else . Although i do not profess to pursue journalism in my opinions. Luckily our legal system has higher standards of evidence then Andrew. He hung Bird and categorised him as the top jalibird in world sport.
Quite a feat i might say even for the obviously biased Andrew.