With allegations of match-fixing surfacing again and an amateurish attitude creeping into cricket, what about selecting a truly professional World XI?
After employing tools of the trade and putting tongue firmly in the cheek, I’ve come up with a genuine Professional World XI where surnames of Test cricketers represent different professions; namely Engineer, Contractor, Bishop, Butler, Turner, Miller, Archer, Pope, Cook, Smith, Clark and Merchant as you holler for a Marshall.
So here is my Professional team of Test cricketers in batting order:
Vijay Merchant (Ind), Nari Contractor (Ind), Graeme Smith (S. Af., capt.), Keith ‘Nugget’ Miller and Colin ‘Funky’ Miller (Aus), Basil Butcher (WI), Ron Archer (Aus), Farokh Engineer (Ind, WK), Malcolm Marshall (WI), Ian Bishop (WI) and CTB ‘Terror’ Turner (Aus).
12th man: Mark Butcher (Eng).
Reserves: Stuart Clark (Aus), Mike Smith (Eng), Ian Butler (NZ), Ken Archer (Aus), Geoff and Nicholas Cook (Eng), George Pope (Eng) and Ghulam Guard (Ind).
Believe it or not, Guard was by profession a policeman in India!
I was tempted to take poetic license and include Australia’s Mark and Peter Taylor and Michael Clarke but the spellings were not accurate and I decided against it.
As many of the players come from different eras, some require an introduction. Opening batsman Merchant was known as the Bradman of India and his first-class batting average of 71.22 from 229 innings is second only to Don Bradman’s of 95.14.
On the tour of England during a wet 1946, Merchant scored 2385 runs at 74.50. Making him one of five Cricketers of the Year 1947, Wisden wrote, “No praise is too high for Merchant who, on any reckoning, must be counted one of world’s greatest batsmen.”
When selecting England’s team to Australia in 1946-47, England needed a reliable partner for Len Hutton. Merchant’s consistency made an English critic sigh, “I wish we could paint Merchant white and take him with us to Australia.”
The Aussie all-rounder Keith Miller was so dynamic and spectacular that today he would have been auctioned for 10 million dollars by an IPL franchise. No wonder he was nicknamed Nugget!
Leading India in the West Indies in 1962, Contractor became the first Test cricketer to almost die on the field when a chucker from Charlie Griffith hit him on his head.
Charles Turner captured 101 wickets at 16.53 in only 17 Tests from 1886 to 1894 and was nicknamed Terror.
Marshall and Keith Miller will open the attack, ‘Terror’ Turner coming at first change, then Bishop and Archer. ‘Funky’ Miller will be the lone spinner, colouring the occasion by dyeing his hair rainbow!
A Professional XI needs professional umpires and they are England’s David Shepherd and India’s Piloo Reporter.
Any additions, Roarers?
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