Future telling Octopus, can it get any weirder?
Roar Pro By Paddy Kilmurray, 12 Jul 2010 Paddy Kilmurray is a Roar Pro
Future telling Octopus, what next? Paul, the ‘Octopus Oracle’ has predicted the outcome of the World Cup final. Unbelievable, or the most ridiculous thing you’ve ever heard?
The media attention which Paul has received is raising eyebrows with the superstitious. Many people – including Roar columnist Adrian Musolino – have deliberately chosen to support the opposite team to whatever Paul has chosen in the hope that it’s all a load of codswallop.
Unfortunately, Paul is yet to be defeated.
Paul rose to fame after predicting the outcome of all of Germany’s six World Cup matches, including their loss to Serbia, and stunning victory over the Socceroos.
Trust the industrious nation of Germany to come up with such a bizarre method of predicting the outcome of matches, especially since Nostradamus gave no inclination during his time as to who would lift the trophy in 2010.
How much faith are people genuinely placing in Paul, and how far are people willing to go in order to come up with other weird and unusual methods of predicting the outcome of sporting events?
There have been suggestions for a Psychic Skippy to be employed to foresee the outcome of domestic codes, I’m sure other nations are coming up with their own mascot to take up future telling duties.
But do we really believe this is possible, or has Paul just got lucky…very lucky?
At first it was considered a good laugh, a conversation starter and something to mull over at the water cooler:
“How bout that Octopus huh, Jeez, he’s a genius.”
Now, regular TV programming is being interrupted in order to get Paul’s opinion on the biggest sporting event in the world.
I for one think this is going to become an even bigger farce than it already is. People are gullible and could take this all too literally. Could you imagine someone literally putting their house on a prediction from Paul, only for him to have an off day, or for it to be the stupidest thing anyone has ever taken notice in?
If I were his owner, now would be the time to capitalize on Paul’s fame, and try to earn a fortune from the creature. He should be capable of being “floated” on the German Stock Exchange, and the initial subscriber share sale should set the owner up for life.
Problem with that is that there are risks inherent in Paul getting it wrong…especially if the business was conducted with football gamblers from certain South American countries. Paul might the need 24-hour protection, or he might end up on a platter.
On the other hand, the owner might have grown very attached to this phenomenon of the deep, and might wish to keep “it” as a member of the family, or, perhaps on display for people to gawk at (for a fee of course).
Perhaps we should enquire as to whether or not Paul sub contracts. We could give him a host of tasks such as whether or not Australia will ever win a World Cup?
Problem is, once Paul starts to lose his knack of getting it right, his value will plummet, even to his owner, and ultimately, he will end up being “cooked”.
Ah! fame, such a fickle beast.
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July 12th 2010 @ 9:56am
Daz said | July 12th 2010 @ 9:56am | Report comment
There are some scientist that have theorised that before the last asteroid strike that gave the earth a ‘clean sweep’ then re-started evolution in favour of the eventual animal, homosapien, that in-fact an octopus-like animal was the most intelligent on the planet, as the earth was 100% covered by water.
I think Paul the Occy proves this, and I will be voting for him in the next election. I’ll also give my plate of calamari a minute silence before diving in aswell.
July 12th 2010 @ 9:57am
Roger said | July 12th 2010 @ 9:57am | Report comment
The octopus doesn’t know what football is, let alone that there is a world cup on.
So, is he just very lucky? By randomly flipping a coin, the odds of guessing 7 games right in a row is 0.78%.
So, what to make of it then?
Explanation: his owner is a very good tipper, and drenches one of the muscles in an irresistible flavour, one that the octopus will go for everytime.
July 12th 2010 @ 2:46pm
BigAl said | July 12th 2010 @ 2:46pm | Report comment
.
.
. this analysis doesn’t really clarify any thing ! – whether it’s the octopus or his ‘owner/feeder’ – it all comes down to the same…
July 12th 2010 @ 3:45pm
Roger said | July 12th 2010 @ 3:45pm | Report comment
Hahaha. Well I for one would’ve thought that it would make much more sense for a PERSON to pick winners than an OCTOPUS.
Maybe that’s just me?
July 12th 2010 @ 6:23pm
John said | July 12th 2010 @ 6:23pm | Report comment
Octopus, journalist, apart from the number of limbs on one and the capacity for alcohol of the other, is there that much difference?
July 13th 2010 @ 5:58pm
Lee said | July 13th 2010 @ 5:58pm | Report comment
That assumes that each flip of the coin effects the next one. Assuming the flips of a coin(octopus picking a box) are an independent event, then each time the odds of him picking right are 0.5.
Sound unlikely that the octopus would get them all right? Or even taking the odds above of 0.78%. Which is 78 out of 10000, roughly 1 in 100, now remember how many aquariums and zoos in the work have probably tried to get their octopus/near/mmanitee to pick the winners and suddenly in 100 doesn’t sound to unlikely. In fact probably more surprising that more animals haven’t picked them all.
July 12th 2010 @ 10:04am
Brett McKay said | July 12th 2010 @ 10:04am | Report comment
For 2022 in Australia, I’d like to see Trevor the Saltwater Crocodile in action. And if his buffet choice of flag-wearing backpackers is a bit harsh, then perhaps we can just settle for chicken carcasses, or maybe octopuses (octopii?). Lock in now, Mr Lowy….
July 12th 2010 @ 10:07am
apaway said | July 12th 2010 @ 10:07am | Report comment
Paul has 9 brains – that’s 6 more than SBS’s panel this morning.
July 12th 2010 @ 10:24am
AndyRoo said | July 12th 2010 @ 10:24am | Report comment
If this is a joke about Kalac then you get a thumbs up from me.
July 12th 2010 @ 3:40pm
apaway said | July 12th 2010 @ 3:40pm | Report comment
You got me, Andy!
July 12th 2010 @ 11:52am
Fussball ist unser leben said | July 12th 2010 @ 11:52am | Report comment
As far as I’m concerned, the SBS WC panel (Kalac, Zdrilic and Zelic) once again provided a fantastic analysis of Football, in general, and the 2010 WC Final, in particular.
Whilst other sports in Australia rely on analysis provided by journalists, who have never played that particular sport at the highest level, BRAVO to SBS for giving us 3 blokes, who have actually played with and against the best in the World.
July 12th 2010 @ 3:50pm
Roger said | July 12th 2010 @ 3:50pm | Report comment
Actually, I found the SBS commentators to be bandwagon opinionists with no real insight into the games.
If I had of wanted to hear negative commentators with little insight, I would’ve switched to FoxSports. I expected more from SBS.
July 12th 2010 @ 11:11am
Rich_daddy said | July 12th 2010 @ 11:11am | Report comment
I couldn’t help but laugh when Paul Demsey said “You guys have all achived on the biggest stage”. Yes, Kalac’s bench warming skills for AC Milan were crucial to their success.
July 12th 2010 @ 12:08pm
mahony said | July 12th 2010 @ 12:08pm | Report comment
The life of a leeper to be fair – even very good ones. He WAS a great keeper – but never a great person or analysis IMO.
July 12th 2010 @ 9:45pm
apaway said | July 12th 2010 @ 9:45pm | Report comment
He was a great shot stopper when at his best. Unfortunately, there’s a lot more to goalkeeping than that.
July 12th 2010 @ 9:52pm
Fussball ist unser leben said | July 12th 2010 @ 9:52pm | Report comment
apaway-
What level have you achieved at playing GK?
FACT: Kalac was Number 2 GK at AC Milan (205-09), which is one of the most prestigious Football clubs in the world. They don’t sign & re-sign rubbish footballers.
I reckon Kalac’s GK credentials can only be lampooned or negatively critiqued by someone, who also has successfully displayed technical proficiency in Goalkeeping at a reasonable professional level.
July 12th 2010 @ 12:31pm
Tom said | July 12th 2010 @ 12:31pm | Report comment
I read somewhere that Octopi are attracted to the colour red, which would explain most of the results to some extent.
July 12th 2010 @ 7:06pm
Tim said | July 12th 2010 @ 7:06pm | Report comment
If you actually look at the flags of the countries involved in the matches that Paul has predicted, this theory doesn’t hold water at all. The Australian and English flags have as much red as the German flag, which has, again, as much red as the Netherlands flag, which has the same colours as the Serbian flag. In fact, the only match Paul predicted in which one team did not have any red on its flag was the Germany-Argentina match.
The same was the case in Euro 2008, where the octopus picked Germany to beat Portugal, despite Portugal’s predominantly red flag, and Germany to beat Turkey, despite the fact that Turkey’s flag has even more red than Germany’s.
July 12th 2010 @ 12:44pm
Towser said | July 12th 2010 @ 12:44pm | Report comment
Wouldnt worry to much about Paul being consulted about anything & everything.
Theres a limit to what an octupus can eat. Isnt there ?
If not Paul could also be an object of diet plans. If succesful this could further enhance his credibility,leading to a career as a television host accompanied by a crab sitting in the other chair.
Maybe then those morning shows will be hosted by people who can talk some sense.
July 12th 2010 @ 12:52pm
Brett McKay said | July 12th 2010 @ 12:52pm | Report comment
Towser, there’s also a limit on how long octopus live, and Paul is apparently nearing stumps in terms of life expectancy..
July 12th 2010 @ 1:07pm
Towser said | July 12th 2010 @ 1:07pm | Report comment
In that case he’d better cram in as many life experiences as possible.
Whens our next election?
July 12th 2010 @ 1:16pm
Planet Warrior said | July 12th 2010 @ 1:16pm | Report comment
or perhaps the planet is one large living organism where all life is contected …..
July 13th 2010 @ 6:10pm
Lee said | July 13th 2010 @ 6:10pm | Report comment
Interesting theory, in fact some claim that when there is a major global event ie 9/11, boxing day tsunami, that random number generators around te world generated numbers that formed sequences, some hold this up as evidence of a “global consciousness”, ofcourse you could argue there will always be some form f a sequence in random numbers if you look hard enough.
July 12th 2010 @ 1:37pm
Mushi said | July 12th 2010 @ 1:37pm | Report comment
Maybe hes just the old Nth monkey
July 12th 2010 @ 2:06pm
Franklin Black said | July 12th 2010 @ 2:06pm | Report comment
Anyone who finds Germany’s win over the Socceroos “stunning” probably believes in the “predictions” of an octopus.
I’ll give Paul one thing – his coach knew his football. Whoever treated the mussels with something to attract Paul had to know which mussel to coat to begin with.