Dear Wallabies, it might actually be you

 
Brett McKay Columnist

By , 16 Aug 2011 Brett McKay is a Roar Expert

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Samoa beat Wallabies

Australia's Matt Giteau, right, fails to handle the ball with pressure from Samoa's George Pisi during their rugby union test match in Sydney, Sunday, July 17, 2011. (AP Photo/Rick Rycroft)

Dear Wallabies, if we’re honest with each other, the doubts have been creeping in for a while. Love like ours will always be full of ups and downs, granted, but still, it doesn’t make the doubts disappear.

We’ve been through a lot in our time together; some amazing highs, like the unexpected Rugby World Cup win in ’99, and some shocking lows, like Edinburgh, and all the shellackings in South Africa, and let’s not even get into any detail about playing New Zealand over the last few years.

But I’m starting to wonder how much more of this I can take?

I’ve tried to stand by you. I’ve tried to maintain face amidst all the setbacks. I’ve given you the time you wanted to rediscover yourself. I even agreed with your desire to refresh yourself with younger bodies, despite the obvious risk that brought upon us when you did.

Maybe that move is starting to pay off, but are you really happy with yourself at the moment? Are you really happy with what you’re doing to us?

Let’s just look at these last few months, just for some examples of the angst I’m feeling.

In June you felt we were in for an amazing period ahead. The Reds had laid the blueprint for successful southern hemisphere rugby, beating all in their path, and doing it in style. You thought the Queensland players would give us the spark we’ve lost in recent years, and that our time to shine was here. I was excited.

But there wasn’t much ‘shining’ against Samoa, was there? What happened there? Was it cockiness or arrogance? Was it a lack of respect for a known giant-killer? And why couldn’t you adjust on the run?

And then you reassured me, and sure enough, everything was rosy again against South Africa. I was relieved.

But hang on, you know that was a long way from the ‘Boks top side, right? You surely didn’t string us along too far ahead of ourselves, while the true Springboks side was secretly training, sorry, “rehabilitating” back in the Republic?

If not, then what did you do to us in Auckland, again?

For the whole week leading in you assured us that this time things would be different. Hoodoos, schmoodoos, you said. The young whippersnapper in 15 went as far as saying you could “tear any team apart”, which I thought was a touch presumptuous, maybe, but still you remained calm in the build-up and the country’s expectations went with you.

I was excited again. Anxious, but excited.

You don’t need me to go into detail about what happened, though, do you?

This is what I’m talking about, with the roller coaster business. I want to ride it out and enjoy everything comes with it, but it can get very tiring very quickly. A week of reading comments like ‘you stupid Wallaby optimists,’ and reminders that hoodoos at certain grounds are nothing to be sneezed at can get very taxing. I wanted to defend you, like you should in all good relationships, but they had a fair point.

And now, we’re ‘up’ again. A strong showing in Durban against the Boks has restored some faith that was on the precipice. I’m suitably impressed. You did everything you should have done against the All Blacks the week previous, and I can feel the love rising again.

Our much-maligned Captain has had his best game in easily twelve months, and a few on the fringe have certainly stepped up when it mattered.

So here’s the thing. I want to say that this up-and-down relationship that we have is a case of classic Costanza: “it’s not you, it’s me.”

But I don’t think it is me. I’ve swallowed all your platitudes, and I’ve “bought in” to all the corporate speak and borderline cockiness/arrogance that you serve up, even if it’s not quite deserved. I know you can’t say, “Actually we think we’re in a bit of trouble this week” at a presser, but really, “we can tear any team apart”?

So, if I can be blunt, I think it might actually be you.

How much practice does it take to be so consistently inconsistent? Why is it that you can play like scared schoolboys one week and master warriors the next?

And why do so many of the team need the axe hanging precariously above to fire up? Isn’t trying to win some silverware – or heck, even just two games on the trot – motivation enough? Do I need to mention there’s a World Cup coming?

The great Roarer Sheek said this week, “Pulling on the gold jersey every time ought to be motivation in itself” and he’s right, that alone should be your only motivation. You’re Australians, for goodness sakes, the best twenty-two Australians in your chosen field.

So please, make it easier for me to maintain the love. I don’t like second-guessing our feelings for each other when it should be obvious we want the same things.

I keep hearing the neighbours, and my god they sound happy together, like a couple of post-first kiss fifteen-year-olds. I don’t think there’s many downs on their roller coaster.

I’m in this for the long haul, I truly am, but I want to believe in you without question. I don’t want the doubts to resurface, not coming into such an important time. I want to be excited for us properly, not nervously or cautiously.

So let’s just stay ‘up’. It’s a much warmer and fuzzier feeling, and who knows where it might take us together…

Love, Brett

Follow Brett McKay on Twitter: @BMcSport
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