Time to put another NRL gripe on the barbie

Tim Prentice Columnist

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Luke Lewis is tackled by Corey Parker. AAP Images

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As the steaks and snags sizzled at a mate’s barbecue last weekend, the ice cold beer was somehow replaced by some great Australian whines.

One of the lads began rattling off the things he didn’t like about rugby league and in a flash the BBQ became a bonfire.

In the tradition of comedian Rodney Rude’s “Ya know what I hate,” everyone pitched forth their gripes about our favourite sport and the banter was still flying long after the grill went cold.

It started out with a good old moan about golden point. No-one present liked it (yet, curiously, some found tolerance for it if their team happened to get up).

We then got stuck into inconsistent referees, the blind mice in the video box, almost weekly jumper changes, salary cap rorters, crappy food at venues, the stadium at Homebush and most of all Channel Nine, the station’s match scheduling, commercials and commentators.

I didn’t say too much on the day as I could hardly get a word in and besides, those juicy T-bones were to die for.

Instead, I thought I’d have a quiet vent here at The Roar. Perhaps you will agree with some of my gripes and I’m sure you’ll have plenty of your own logs to toss on the fire.

OK, get those bibs on, here we go:

I am growing increasingly frustrated at players rushing in to pat a team-mate on the back after he has sloppily lost the ball on the first tackle or kicked it out on the full attempting a quick re-start.

For heaven’s sake, let the guilty party know he has committed a mortal sin, and that he has cost his team dearly. Hopefully, he’ll be terrified to cough it up next time he handles.

And while I am on kicking, it peeves me to see players kicking the ball dead from 40 metres in order to take a dangerous fullback or winger out of play. I realise it gives the defence time to get set but it’s boring and devoid of all confidence and imagination.

I loathe players saying “full credit to the boys” after a win. That’s a broken record, surely they can come up with something more original.

Two seasoned commentators, Laurie Daley and Bob Fulton, have really annoying habits that should have been eradicated long ago by their producers.

Lozza, the word is “get” not “git.” Take that on board. Please.

Bozo probably means well but that’s no excuse for punctuating almost every sentence with “I mean…” If you say what you mean, that will be meaningful enough.

Then there’s ABC radio with its commercial-free match commentary headed up by Warren Ryan and David Morrow. Someone should tell these guys that people need to know the score often, not every seven or eight minutes.

And while on the media, how can Channel 9 employ Darren Lockyer with a voice that sounds like broken glass rolled into sandpaper on steroids? Sure, the guy did it all as a player but he is extremely hard to listen to and take notice of as an expert.

TAB Sportsbet’s Jaimee Rogers is probably a lovely young lady. I just think she should be advertising toothpaste rather than spruiking the latest football odds. Can somebody turn those teeth down a bit?

Let’s move on to some coaches. Does anyone want to see Steve Kearney get angry, even slightly miffed at Parra’s lamentable performances? They say nice guys run last. He probably will.

And what about Ivan Clearout, I mean Cleary, at Penrith? Coach, rugby league legends don’t grow on trees in the golden west or anywhere else. What were you thinking releasing Luke Lewis, your club’s current and best player of the past decade?

Oh, and before I pass the tongs over to you, dear Roarers, do ya know what I really hate?

Queensland winning Origin.

Again.

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