I had a bit of a chuckle when I read this story, even though as a life long football fan I shouldn’t have.
I’ve experienced African culture and this tells you a bit about how football reflects the people themselves, their values and way of life.
Two lower division Nigerian football clubs – Police Machine and Plateau United Feeder – were locked together on points heading into the final round.
To gain promotion to the Nigerian National League they both needed to win and win convincingly so they would progress ahead of the other on goal difference.
Both teams were expected to win but no one could have predicted the final scores.
Police Machine 67 – Bubayaro 0.
You would have thought that was enough of a win for the Police Machine to win promotion but no, hang on, the results from the other ground have just come through over the loudspeakers:
Plateau United Feeder 79 – Akruba 0.
Police Machine needed to win and outscore Plateau United Feeder, but the final results would have seen the latter promoted on goal difference.
So you think those match results sound a bit one sided? Well so did the Nigerian Football Federation and a chorus of betting shops all around the world.
Nigeria’s football authorities have suspended all four clubs involved, calling the results “A mind-boggling show of shame.
“It is unacceptable – a scandal of huge proportions,” said a spokesman from the Nigeria Football Federation (NFF) on the two scorelines.
They have imposed an indefinite ban on the four clubs and struck the results from the records, with further investigations promised.
Leading 7 – 0 at halftime, Plateau United Feeder managed to score 72 of their goals in the second half or roughly a goal every 34 seconds.
Similarly Police Machine found the net 61 times after the break in their match but lagged behind the Feeders at a goal every 44 seconds.
Bubayaro owner Shuaibu-Gara Ahmed Gombe, who was in Lagos and not at the club’s game, had heard rumours about the sting before the event and said he had ordered the team not to play the match, but he was outmanouvered by team officials.
“As soon as I heard the result, I disbanded the team,” he told BBC Sport. “It’s disappointing that some people would bring the game to disrepute out of greed and desperation.
“I have written a petition to the police in Bauchi to investigate this shame and arrest anyone found to be involved.”
Not sure if writing to the police would actually have any effect, because his club was after all playing the Police Machine, a team made up of Nigerian Police.
It is also claimed that attempts to make arrests after the Bubayaro match were thwarted when players and officials disappeared to the betting shops as soon as the final whistle sounded.
Those who attended the two matches reported strange incidents, including bizarre refereeing decisions, amazing own goals, non-existent offside, inexplicable time added on and club officials, rather than ball boys, running the ball back to the half way line, immediately after goals had been scored.
A Nigerian journalist who saw Bubayaro’s defeat against Police Machine, who asked not to be identified in order to protect his own safety, told BBC Sport: “In the second half, we started witnessing outrageous own goals, free-kicks and terrible goalkeeping.
“Feeders blasted goal after goal past Bubayaro. Officials of the club turned into emergency ball boys, instead of retrieving the ball from the net, they quickly threw another ball into the centre circle.
“It was ridiculous, because the losing side didn’t make any effort and the officiating was abysmal, with controversial calls being made and unaccounted additional minutes played.
“Police Machine people were on their mobile phones updating officials of the scores at the other match and urging the team to hurry up and score more goals.”
The NFF called the situation a “mind-boggling show of shame” and said players, match officials and the tournament coordinator will be investigated for match-fixing.
Funnily enough, this is not the biggest defeat recorded in club football.
In 2002, AS Adema recorded a 149 – 0 victory against Stade Olympique L’Emyrne in Madagascar’s Premier League.
That’s a very respectable goal every 36 seconds.
Some other notable football thrashings:
1885: Arbroath 36-0 Bon Accord (Scotland FA record).
1995: Man Utd 9-0 Ipswich Town (English Premier League record).
2001: Australia 31-0 American Samoa (World Cup qualifier record).
Despite their heroic goal scoring efforts, the Police Machine and the Plateau United Feeders didn’t quite make it into the Nigerian National League.
Are you the ultimate team manager? Pick your own superstar team and go head to head with other football fans for glory and cash prizes on Draftstars. Imagine what you could be buying instead. Set a deposit limit.
Emi Martinez was saved by a new rule that resets yellow cards at the end of extra time, meaning his second yellow for taunting…
This season the top five leagues rankings of European football have been flipped on its head, as new competition heavyweights emerge. Just look at…
In all likelihood, just sixth spot remains up for grabs as we approach the final three rounds of A-League action in season 2023/24 and…
Not only did Erling Haaland's header hit the bar, but Bernardo Silva missed the rebound tap-in that came off his knee. Manchester City went…
After Manchester City saved Luka Modric's shot, the person in the stands didn't return the ball, holding up the penalty shootout for almost a…
Bayern Munich scored the only goal to defeat Arsenal 1-nil and progress to the semifinals. Former player Martin Keown says it's disappointing his former…
