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Australia v South Africa 5th ODI: The Liebke Ratings

23rd November, 2014
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James Faulkner has seriously slipped in his ODI form. (AP Photo/Jon Super)
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23rd November, 2014
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Australia and South Africa headed to the SCG for the final game of the series. Despite the terrible film ‘Superman 4′ scheduled to follow the cricket on Nine, neither team could be convinced to switch to a 70 over a side match.

Here, then, are the ratings for an official One Day International.

Dead Rubber Batting
Grade: D

A lot of people look down their nose at dead rubber runs, seeing them as less valuable than those scored when the series is still alive.

Not me. I remember the Mark Taylor era of Australian cricket, in which Australia invariably lost matches after wrapping up a series. It was a habit that proved awfully hard to break with Steve Waugh eventually having to gather together arguably the best Test team of all time to put an end to it. That was a lot of work, and it’d be a shame to throw it all away, so I’m a big fan of players who now step up when there is nothing on the line.

Of course, nobody steps up when there is nothing on the line better than Shane Watson, and he did so once again here, bludgeoning 82 off 93 balls before being caught with the score on 218.

Watson’s dismissal saw Glenn Maxwell promoted to see if he could also flourish in the dead rubber environment. Maxwell arrived at the crease with a Batting Strike Rate of 120 runs per 100 balls. This is, of course, statistics gone mad. One hundred balls? For Maxwell? Preposterous. Besides, we all know that if Glenn somehow ever did face 100 balls, he’d be 832 not out.

As it is, he faced only 10 here before skying one to Farhaan Behardien for 7.

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The shot did highlight his leadership potential, however, as it inspired almost all of his teammates to follow suit, with everybody going Full Maxwell as Australia crashed from 4/264 in the 44th over to 8/267 in the 46th.

Only team rebel James Faulkner somehow resisted the urge to join in the mad collapse of crazed slogging. He hit the winning runs off the first ball of the final over, ensuring Australia stumbled drunkenly home. In the process, they also regained the Number One ODI spot in world cricket. It was a performance fully befitting such a prestigious ranking.

Never in doubt.

South African Selectors
Grade: B

The South African selectors responded harshly to the series loss, dropping both Dale Steyn and AB de Villiers from their team. Oh, sure, they smokescreened it with talk of ‘resting’ and ‘incredibly painful rib injuring’. But nobody was fooled.

The absence of de Villiers allowed the other South African batsmen to thrive and they responded well, amassing an impressive 6/280. It therefore appears as if de Villiers will now have to return to the South African first class system and see if he can amass enough runs there to give himself another shot at international cricket.

Best of luck, AB! Just try your hardest and see what happens.

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Rain Delays
Grade: C-

In the 33rd over of the South African innings, with the score at 2/164, a shower swept over the ground, forcing the players from the field. The assumption, based on history, was that this brief SCG rain delay would see South Africa’s total adjusted to something like 8/71.

Instead, it had no impact whatsoever on the South African innings. It wasn’t until a similar rain delay in the Australian innings that Messrs Lewis and Duckworth forced their way into proceedings. After consultation with the umpires, two overs were lost, the original 281 target was adjusted to 275 and everybody was given permission to immediately start complaining about the complexities of the Duckworth Lewis system.

It’s a fair point. I mean, why isn’t there a blindingly trivial formula that everybody can understand regardless of their level of education, which also accurately allows for the multiple complex-factors that can be introduced by a rain delay?

Lift your game, mathematics.

Pat Cummins
Grade: B

The rain that disrupted the South African innings came in the middle of an over by the cool-headed finisher from the previous match, Pat Cummins.

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Cummins was the pick of the Australian bowlers, taking 3/54 off his 9 overs, including two wickets either side of the rain break. In the process, his bowling action drew comparisons from some of the commentators to that of former Australian all-rounder Keith Miller.

This comparison didn’t hold up all that well when checked via split screen technology, with revelations that Cummins had not once bowled in black and white footage.

Still, Miller famously once said that “pressure is a Messerschmitt up your arse, playing cricket is not.” Which raises the question of when Cricket Australia will get professional enough to test youngsters like Cummins in this fashion? Surely it’s the only way we’ll really know if they’re worthy of a World Cup spot.

Streakers
Grade: B+

During the Australian innings, a streaker made his way onto the field. Since Andrew Symonds wasn’t playing, it was left to security guards to bring him down and issue the mandatory fine of $5,500.

This seems remarkably inefficient. Why not instead charge $5,500 for everybody who comes to the game and then, at the end of the match, refund the money to those who didn’t streak? Simple.

Sure, you could argue this policy might impact the number of people willing to attend a game of cricket. But, judging by the crowd sizes this series, it might not too.

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