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First cricketing memory: Ten Little Ducks

The MCG hosted more than 80,000 fans for a BBL game. (Photo: Twitter)
Roar Guru
28th June, 2015
1

I think it was the English paceman John Snow who once said “The Ashes are coming!” and it is certainly getting close now.

However, far from the Test grounds of England called by David Gower or David ‘Bumble’ Loyd, are feats on the cricket field that are exceedingly humble.

Below is one of my earliest cricket playing memories.

10 Little Ducks
It was in the Under-10s
In a summer long, long ago,
When we were sent in to bat
On a cement pitch that kept really low

They had a zippy bowler
From the rougher side of town,
And we were still getting settled
When the first wicket went down

Our opening bat Charlie says,
‘I tried me hardest just to clock it’,
But that ball went past me so fast
with more zing than a rocket

(What he was really saying,
lest you think me some kind of dope,
Was that if Charlie couldn’t score,
then the rest of us had no hope!)

They say the role of a number three
Is to right a ship that’s sinks,
But when the ball removed his middle pole
Number three said ‘crikey that stinks’

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Billy Turner our solid opener
Tried to steer us clear of trouble,
His forceful flick through the leg-side
Brought up a much needed double

As wickets tumbled left and right
A feeling was felt bright and clear,
Through the remaining batsman it spread,
Like a bushfire this thing called fear

When the groan from the parents
Signified that I was in,
I announced to all and sundry
That I would not give in,

As for what I was really feeling like inside
I will place it in this awful context,
It’s like when a prisoner on death row is told
‘Hey mate you are next’,

When the bowler turned with a menacing glance
In my mind a thought was created,
This surely was the Demon Spofforth
In a 10-year-old body re-incarnated

His first ball that he bowled to me
Made an unearthly fizz,
In my mind I cried aloud
‘Mummy I want to whizz’

I summed up the ball like Bradman
And let it pass with flair,
Then I heard a nick and said to myself
“Who put that bloody off stump there?”

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It didn’t take a mathematics don
To tally up our score,
It pains me but I must concede
We were all out for four

By carrying his bat through the innings
Billy Turner was our best,
A feat achieved by Charlie Bannerman
In cricket’s first ever Test

With two runs to his name
And the two extras their bowler sent,
Billy’s contribution to our score off the bat
Was a perfect 100 percent

So I will not jest and I will not lie
I can tell you all quite solemn,
The scorebook from that innings revealed
10 little ducks all in a column

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