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The walking dead? Lost seasons loom for Richmond, Fremantle and Port Adelaide

27th April, 2016
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GWS and Richmond: more alike than you might think. (AAP Image/Joe Castro)
Expert
27th April, 2016
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When the weekend’s bullets left their mark on Richmond and Fremantle’s wounded seasons, the greatest indignity was the identity of the triggermen.

Both of these teams had expectations perhaps not to go all the way, but at least to be formidable roadblocks for the teams that ultimately would go one or two steps just past them. What these teams were ‘meant’ to do was lose title fights by decision after bloodying the likes of a Hawthorn or West Coast. They weren’t supposed to have their seasons ended by freaking Carlton and Melbourne.

Richmond’s season isn’t over, although it is on life support, with Sunday’s defeat a significant flesh wound leaving them at 1-4. The Dockers on the other hand, are done. Their premiership chances were written off in this space a fortnight ago, and now their finals hopes are gone too.

Standing (or, rather, passed out on the pavement) at 0-5 with away games against Adelaide and Hawthorn in the next three weeks, Fremantle are more likely to finish in the bottom four than the top eight. Aaron Sandilands and Nat Fyfe are out, and then there’s the other problem that the Dockers aren’t any good at football right now.

The Carlton game was a farce – a suburban reserves football clash contested by hungover tradesmen masquerading as an AFL game. Fremantle are down on personnel, but where once they seemed the most disciplined, mentally switched on team in the competition, their defensive lapses are killing them more than their lack of attacking creativity.

Dale Thomas’s third goal snuck through because no Docker thought to guard the goal-line. Bryce Gibbs, the only Carlton player whose foot skills should be a consideration, was left unmanned inside 50 for a decisive goal in the dying minutes. Defeat was sealed the only way it could be: with a mind-numbing turnover.

Fremantle’s collapse can be put at the feet of a confluence of factors: injuries, luck regressing to the mean, and, perhaps, just a general fatigue. Last season’s preliminary final against Hawthorn felt like a team emptying all its chambers and then throwing the revolver at its foe’s face as a final desperate ploy. The Dockers were heroic that night, and commendable all season. But they might have fired not only their last best shot, but also their last shot full stop.

Richmond’s fall is less explicable. Heading into last year’s finals they might have been the third best team in the league. Today, only percentage separates the Tigers from 17th.

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The 2015 yellow and black were the AFL’s answer to Atletico Madrid. They were defensively brilliant, expertly structured and disciplined, and while they were modest on offence, they were efficient going forward, and clinical when they needed to be.

Richmond also had the habit of rising to the quality of their opposition. Like Atletico make Barcelona seem less frightening than anyone else can, the Tigers made Hawthorn look almost reassuringly mortal. Unfortunately though, Damien Hardwick is not Diego Simeone.

The Tigers are no longer shape shifting to meet the quality of their opponent. They now have a permanent shape, which is ‘badness’.

It’s unclear what Richmond do well, aside from swimming in mediocrity. Their defence has been under siege, with the Tigers ranking third last in inside 50 differential, unable to win field position. The two teams below them in that stat? Essendon and Brisbane.

An odd lethargy seems to have infected the entire team. This iteration of the Tigers has no verve. They don’t play with pace, or passion, or force. They drift through games, not good enough to be effective, not quite terrible enough to draw too much attention to themselves. If Richmond were an actress, they’d be Kristen Stewart.

The Tigers miss Brett Deledio desperately, and without him they seem sapped of creativity. On offence, the Tigers are epitomised by their conservative skipper, and on defence, they resemble Dustin Martin on Chapel St after a music festival.

Richmond have rebounded from slow starts the past two seasons, but with a deeper crop of ‘decent’ teams this season (how many ‘gimme’ games are there in the AFL right now?) competing for the finals, their Lazarus performance might not have a final act.

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Richmond play two of their next three games against Hawthorn and Sydney, and right now it seems impossible remembering that the Tigers beat both of those teams last year. A 2-6 start for the Tigers (at best) seems almost inevitable, and while that won’t quite be a death knell for the season, an overweight lady will begin to clear her throat.

This week the Tigers play Port Adelaide, the season’s biggest disappointment to date. It’s not as though Richmond and Fremantle give the impression that they’re not trying – it just seems like they’re not all that good. Port Adelaide don’t have that excuse.

The Power play with the intensity of a broken fork. Their pressure is deplorable and their defensive set-up aspires to be deplorable. There are more ‘easy’ goals kicked against them than any other team.

With the talent on their list, simply finishing in the eight should have been disappointing for Port. It should have been top four, or at least top six, or bust. Accordingly, they’ve spent the season hitting on ‘19′.

Port Adelaide Power walk off sadly The Power is out at Port Adelaide. Can Hinkley provide a fix? (AAP Image/Dave Hunt)

As Ryan Buckland wrote, Port could very well finish in the bottom four. For a team with Robbie Gray, Ollie Wines, Chad Wingard, Travis Boak, Charlie Dixon, Hamish Hartlett and Justin Westhoff, and respectable supplementary talent, that isn’t just disappointing – it’s inconceivable.

Across 2013 and 2014, Port Adelaide were the most entertaining team to watch in the league. Hawthorn were the best team to watch, but Port were new and fresh, and lacked Hawthorn’s clinical polish, in a way that made them more endearing. The cauldron of the Adelaide Oval seemed like the best atmosphere in football. All that goodwill has since turned to ash.

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Port aren’t finished. They’re the most uninspiring 2-3 of all-time, but they’re still just 2-3, one win from sixth. There’s a soft fixture to come too, although it’s hard to know if a ‘soft fixture’ exists for a team as soft themselves as the Power.

Port have won 20 of their past 41 games. Despite how intoxicating their best looks, the reality is that they’ve been a mediocre side for a long time now. They’re a one-way running team, and when they’re met by teams that can put up the semblance of a brick wall, Port don’t have the work rate to find an alternate route to victory.

It’s easy to look at the names on Port’s list and talk yourself into them turning it around. You can’t teach what Wingard and Gray can do, but you can teach effort, right? Maybe not. Work rate isn’t just a mindset – it’s a skill, every bit as valuable as Hamish Hartlett’s bullet passing, and it’s one that this team doesn’t possess.

Richmond, Fremantle and Port Adelaide have all been cruelled by circumstance. How different would these teams have looked in the first five weeks with Brett Deledio, Ivan Maric, Aaron Sandilands, David Mundy, Harley Bennell, Paddy Ryder, Jay Schulz and Angus Monfries running around?

All three fanbases deserve better than this. For decades, the only currency that Richmond and Fremantle fans have dealt in has been misery. Port Adelaide were as low as a football club could be after the 2011 and 2012 seasons. Their rebound to become every neutral’s second team was football’s best story in 2013 and 2014.

The three teams can curse happenstance to varying degrees, but the reality is that when they started the year they all would have had not altogether fanciful dreams of playing deep into September. Now, they live with the nightmare that their seasons might be over before the end of May, or in Fremantle’s case, in the last week of April.

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