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In a stunning exposé, a much respected newspaper intends to reveal information it has that will rock the world of football much more than corrupt FIFA executives, match fixing, crowd trouble or pre-game face offs have in the past.
Melbourne based paper the Herald Sun is set to step up it’s war on the terrorist breeding ground that is association football with a campaign that will ensure Australia will be safe from potential Jihadi recruiters for a long time to come.
In an exclusive, off the record chat, an anonymous Herald Sun staffer revealed the latest, highly worrying revelations, which are due to be published this weekend.
Last night at the Euros:
» England vs Wales
» Ukraine vs Northern Ireland
» Germany vs Poland
“Soccer is an obvious breeding ground for disenfranchised individuals. All that choreographed chanting, the herd mentality and the proliferation of people with strange surnames eating foods that aren’t deep fried in batter and stuck on a stick. To be quite frank it’s an explosive keg waiting to go off”
“Our team of highly trained investigative reporters have spent hours in the local deconstructed coffee shop browsing Wikipedia and discovered a rather worrying trend that has been hidden in plain sight for years”.
“We noticed that a lot of foreign footballers have a habit of playing under assumed names. Did you realise that there was a man called Edson Arantes do Nascimento who travelled the world using a false name? A false name that wasn’t even that convincing, Pele. I mean really, is that even a name! This is a man that would eventually end up selling drugs to desperate middle aged men? Drugs are a known source of terrorist funding. This is a connection that is obvious to any highly trained reporter and we at the Herald Sun have plenty of them”
“In the UK there was a footballer known simply as ‘Gazza’. You don’t have to be a Pulitzer prize winner to see the connection to Hezbollah in that one. It’s a subtle, but obvious, connection that has, possibly, been used to forward the recruitment policies of an outlawed political organisation.”
I asked what the connection to Australian security was, both the examples he had given were of people playing the sport overseas. I was a little taken aback by his next revelation.
“Are you aware of a footballer, based in Australia, named Miguel Angel Garcia Perez-Roldan?”
It’s a name you would remember, yet try as I might I couldn’t remember him.
“Corona”.
There it was, in my own backyard, a connection I had never made. Why was this happening? Why were people entering our country using assumed names and yet still being able to influence thousands of people to chant their names?
It hit me later on. I had left my source trying to work out which jam jar of liquid he had to pour, and in which order, to make his decaf, almond milk latte when the realisation hit me. I was being played for a fool. All those years spent mixing with people from other ethnic backgrounds, enjoying their company, their love of sport and all that entails.
The feeling of community you get from following a sport that can start a conversation in any country, a bond that has the ability to create relationships where none would logically exist, was nothing but an evil plot to turn me from a sane and rational individual into a callous and uncaring killer.
I shall be renouncing my life long love of football forthwith and intend to pursue some safer pastimes, however I am unsure which sport is safer than the one I love.
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