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The chopping block: Madge is no longer on Neighbours, Souths need to follow suit!

Michael Maguire preaches a brutal form of rugby league. (Photo: AAP)
Roar Guru
25th June, 2016
17

With Round 15 over plus Origin 2 going to script, let’s attempt to come up with at least four players, officials or technology to place on the guillotine this week.

Firstly, I will make it clear the flogging of a dead horse in relation to the Burgess brothers will be overlooked, as their master is responsible for their dip in form.

Unlike Chris Waller taking charge of a promising, albeit inconsistent colt and turning it into an unlimited ATM for owners and his racing team, the Burgess brothers have regressed.

Michael Maguire
Unlike his namesake on Neighbours, who probably over stayed her stint by a few decades, this Madge needs to go before South Sydney return to the dark old days of crowd numbers to rival that at the SFS a few weeks back between the Roosters and Tigers.

The Burrow looked well down on numbers last Friday night, and continued insipid performances could see it renamed the ‘The Row’.

2014 should be a thing of the past and South Sydney need to leave the tactics that won them the title to Russell Crowe’s ghost writer to insert in an update of his Book of Feuds.

Predictable is the simplest way to describe the current Souths game plan. The lightweight Tigers have easily accounted for the bash-and-barge style twice in 2016.

If that doesn’t spell out in capital letters that you need to change your game plan, then your time is up.

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It’s hard to point to any current member of the first-grade squad who has progressed under Madge and his sidekick, Matt ‘Krusty’ King. The controversial Coffs Harbour session has clearly developed a rift within the ranks, not helped by with the shoddy recruitment off the field.

The current side is slowly resembling the halcyon days under the guidance of Alan Jones. In Jones’ defence, his side was not predictable during his reign, aside from the fact they didn’t have a great emphasis on defence.

A man who was playing around that era was none other than Manoa Thompson, the great Jarryd Hayne’s old man. The release of Greg Inglis to the Broncos should pave the way for a huge play for the Hayne Plane.

The St George Dragons and Paul MacGregor
The inept use of a ‘cooling off period’ clause in a contract agreed by Luke Keary a while ago has left St George completely (pardon the French) rooted! Their options now stand with re-signing Benji Marshall, taking back Jackson Hastings (who is on the nose at Bondi more than a Daryl Sommers comeback) or hoping Ash Taylor wants a move if Elgey returns and Tyrone Roberts is preferred.

Realistically they’d probably end up with the underwhelming Roberts, though in his defence he has performed consistently well this season. The problem for the Saints is balance, having two similar halves who both like to organise, kick and do not complement one another. Both possess solid running games but neither straightens the attack like a Keary would do.

If I were a fan of this club I’d be rounding up the troops and commencing the old ‘Oust Doust’ campaign with plenty of gusto and purpose. Nobody could question the sides forward pack but the outside backs and halves are the obvious glaring weakness in a side that continues to frustrate their fans.

I’m sick of hearing Saints fans who lay the blame on Wayne Bennett.

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Bottom line, since the great man has departed the players St George Illawarra have signed have been totally underwhelming, not thought out or addressed key positions that needed strengthening. Hands up who thinks Tim Lafai, Kurt Mann, Gerard Beale, Dylan Farrell, Sam Williams or Dane Nielsen were good signings?

Daniel Tupou
Another regular on the Block who must be feeling the heat after the awesome debut of young Rooster rookie Joseph Manu. Surely a trip up the F3 to Morry Breen Oval for the ex-NSW winger, is on the cards this weekend. With Ferguson to return after Origin, SKD and Copley both solid in the weekends improved performance, Tupou must be close to ‘The Chop’.

Aside from Tupou’s form coach Robinson must be having nightmares about is SKD’s passing skills. Without flogging a dead horse who could forget that pass early on last year in the Roosters defeat to the Broncos which hit Darius Boyd on the chest? He reminded me of that howler when he had the Warriors at sixes and sevens and passed the ball to the touch judge late on in the piece.

Keeping SKD in the centres might be fraught with danger as he possesses the same passing skills as Josh Dugan. Any winger playing outside SKD will only touch the Steeden passing the ball to Jake Friend for tap re-starts or retrieving the pill from either the touchy or row three in the stands after an SKD off-load.

Brett Stewart
Another carry over champ, the Snake was slow and looked way passed his used by date on the sunshine strip last night. Great club man and all but if Trent Barrett wants to save his career it’s time he shift’s Tom Trbojevic into the No.1 jersey. Possibly a shift to the No.6 could work for the man known as the Snake.

Dylan Walker is not a No.6 and Jamie Lyon should stay in the centres. A lot of players that have tried to form a combination with DCE have failed so why not give Stewart a run. He is a smart player who can sniff a gap or sum up a situation, but his time at the back is done and dusted, as his pace is starting to decline at an alarming rate.

Manly can still utilise Lyon, Tommy T and Parcell as kicking options over Stewart. Before Manly fans say, what about Steve Matai, well he plays as many games these days as Brett Papworth did for the Chooks from 88-91!

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Something needs to change as the side many had locked in as top four contenders look unbalanced and lost in attack at present. Another option could be moving Dylan Walker to fullback and shifting Tommy T into the centres, Jamie Lyon to No.6. A radical shift in could get the best out of a squad that on paper should be sitting higher on the ladder than 14th.

However, after spending a king’s ransom to secure the services of DCE, the depth at Trent Barrett’s disposal has been exposed and then some during a tough initiation to life as a first grade coach.

Ray Barnacle
Ray has taken off with Semi Radradra to be his security guard and take out any suspicious journalist types on the island of Taveuni. Sure the money he was offered pales into comparison to the four schooner and a meat pie Friday, but his loyalty has left me struggling for material this week and missing his statistical genius that assures I’m up to scratch with each round.

A few weeks ago I had Keith Galloway on the chopping block until Ray kindly advised me I was watching a clash from 2014! His attention to detail and Rainman-like statistical quotes,have been sorely missed. Ray, I hope you read this message and we get the band, the wolf pack, back together. It’s a label you had for us, usually around three am at the kebab shop on Beaumont Street Hamilton!

I did hear you took out Danny Weidler when you were posing as a Finnish tourist at a local watering hole by spiking his pineapple cruiser with kava. Sending him packing with a one way ticket to neighbouring Rabi Island, had me in stitches. I’m sure you got the idea from when we watched Season 1 of the new improved Hawaii Five O in the off-season.

The Blues old brigade
When we catch up with Laurie and Bozo, this time at a closer venue to game three. The Man O War Hotel in the Rocks to decide the line-up for the dead rubber, Ray and I will vote to dispose of the Blues elder brigade: Blake Ferguson, James Maloney, James Tamou and Josh Mansour, all well over 25 and past it, and bring in new blood with a view to Origin 2017.

Trent Merrin, the Morris twins, Mitchell Pearce and Tim Grant will be the names we put forward. Seriously the balance was off the other night. Mansour spilling that great off-load from Jenko and then calling him in and leaving Gagai unmarked for the second try. Made the prince of centres look ordinary and he unfairly copped the wrap for the loss.

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Replays will show the two dropped balls he was pinged for should have been penalty tries as Allan Langer held him back on both occasions.

Robbie Farah was way ahead of Cam Smith and I fell off the Jason recliner when the serial cheat was named man of the match. He is now pulling the wool over the eyes of the panel who makes the call of ‘best on ground”.

Sheesh! Anyone get the campaign song started for Origin 2017, Ain’t no Mountain High Enough. The Jimmy Barnes featuring Shannon Noll version, of course.

So fellow Roarers – who made your skin crawl this weekend and why?

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