- Video
-
Club Roar
Captured a great grassroots sporting moment? We want to see it!Content Collections
The Roar Community
- Join
- Login
Now are the times that try men’s souls. And by “men”, I mean me.
Maybe it’s just the usual post-football malaise, but sport seems uncommonly depressing right now.
Obviously it’s worse when your team misses out on the big prize, as both my teams did on grand final weekend, but surely even those Australian sporting fans lucky enough to escape that heartache are feeling a little dispirited.
In cricket, our brave men in yellow have been humiliated in South Africa, 5-0, in one of those disposable one-day series that mean absolutely nothing and can safely be ignored except in the unlikely event that you lose 5-0.
It was a blow to our prestige and pride that probably showed, once and for all, that winning cricket games without any good bowlers can be difficult. Admittedly, when back at home this summer the Australians will have a much stronger attack – but THAT much stronger? I feel we’ll be pinning a lot of hopes on Glenn Maxwell.
That might not have even been the most depressing recent development for Australia’s cricket fans. Possibly more upsetting – certainly more ominous – was India’s complete splattering of New Zealand in their test series.
The Black Caps have been generally considered a pretty decent side, but they were crushed mercilessly beneath the delicate heel of Ravi Ashwin.
Strong indications are that India is basically unbeatable at home, and moreover that when Australia next arrives there, they’ll be even more unbeatable than usual, when faced with the baggy greens’ famous indomitable spirit and complete ineptitude against spin.
In short, it looks like both home and away in the near future Australia must pin all its hopes on Mitchell Starc recovering well from injury and bowling every opponent out for under 100 in every innings.
Elsewhere in the sporting world, Australia came second in the Rugby Championship, a less-than-inspiring result given that runner-up status was achieved via a couple of fitful victories over the Pumas and splitting two tests against a Springboks side that was positively atomised by the All Blacks. And that in our own sorties against the latter terrifying combination, New Zealand kicked sand in the Wallabies’ face and stole their girlfriends.
Really, there is simply no cause for optimism in rugby at all, given that the All Blacks have somehow ascended to a heretofore unsuspected level above “invincible” and seem to be incapable of decline.
After last year’s World Cup their two best players retired, and it only made them stronger. (Click to Tweet)
Right now they might as well be the Harlem Globetrotters for all the likelihood that anyone can ever beat them. And the Wallabies can’t even beat England: winning the Bledisloe Cup is currently as distant a prospect as the reunification of the rugby codes.
Speaking of the rugby codes, the rugby league Four Nations is about to start, a tournament deficient in hype, sorely lacking in glamour, and promising very little in the way of satisfaction for any Australian.
Should the Kangaroos triumph, a sigh of relief is the most euphoric emission anyone will allow: should New Zealand or England take the prize, wailing and gnashing of teeth shall be in order. It might be best we just hope nobody notices the thing is even on. A hope that may well be fulfilled, by the way – the Australian rugby and cricket teams may be feeling a little battered and bruised, but for real world-beating weakness, you have to go to the concept of international rugby league in 2016.
We turn to the indigenous game, relieved that there is no international competition to bum us out. What CAN bum us out, though, is the trade period, that time of year when AFL clubs do their best to disabuse of the notion that romance or loyalty still exist.
A Hawthorn legend looks to move west. Sydney’s exciting young gun wants to go to Hawthorn. Brisbane shops its captain around. Free agents careen around the country like pinballs. The game just isn’t the same. So for light relief let’s think a bit about whether a Brownlow medallist should be stripped of the medal for doping violations. That’ll cheer us up.
I guess there’s always football. The round-ball variety. The penalty Australia scored in order to salvage a draw that will be vital to their progress to the next stage of qualifying for a World Cup in which victory is literally impossible was incredibly exciting, was it not.
I joke, but there are several national teams I’d kill to see salvage a draw right now.
Honestly, the best sporting story I’ve seen in the last week has been Nick Kyrgios. No
w there’s an Aussie I can get excited about, which is ironic, because he’s an Aussie who can’t get excited about himself. But as I always say, if you can’t beat ’em, piss ’em off, and Kyrgios is doing a great job on that front. If only the Wallabies were capable of upsetting anyone that much.
But let’s be honest, Kyrgios is relatively small comfort. So I guess, Aussie Diamonds, a nation turns its lonely eyes to you? I’ve never been much of a netball man, but now, it seems, is the time. Because I’m sure sport wasn’t supposed to make me feel this sad.
If there are other sporting stories warming your cockles this week, do let me know. I need it.