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Bring back the (rugby league) scrum

James Moylan new author
Roar Rookie
25th March, 2017
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Learning how to push in a scrum would help bring back the good times in the NRL. (AAP Image/Action Photographics, Colin Whelan)
James Moylan new author
Roar Rookie
25th March, 2017
24
1429 Reads

When I was a young second-rower playing for the Carlingford Redbacks, I was kept in the team for one reason only: I knew my way around a scrum.

Supported by my teammates, when the drive was on, I would often hook a ball out of a tunnel against the feed.

My teammates often joked that I had prehensile feet. I couldn’t run, had no ball handling skills, found it impossible to read the run of play and was a complete drop-kick when it came to the drop-kick. I still had some value because, way back in those days when giants still walked upon the earth, the scrum was central to the game of rugby league.

Long ago, in the dark ages up until the 1980s, the scrum actually meant something. The reason many front-rowers looked a little like the Hulk on steroids was all down to the scrum.

The reason that second-rowers had thin heads, cauliflower ears, and fat legs, was all down to the scrum. But that is a thing of the past. In the modern game the scrum has become a joke.

Like tits on a bull – everyone knows why scrums occur but they are, nonetheless, entirely useless.

Now old-timers wince whenever we see a scrum pack down. It’s become all about going through the motions. There is no contest in a modern scrum. Where once the fine art of packing down and then taking the strain preceded a genuine contest of strength and skill; now the scrum is simply an excuse for a breather and a bit of a natter.

The scrum has evolved into a break in play where all the players can spend a few moments discussing the weather and maybe what pub they will visit when the contest is over.

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One of the most satisfying sounds in rugby league was once the sound of two packs of big men thumping together as a scrum was set. Now all you hear is the faint whisper of polite conversation. So why bother with this ongoing farce?

I can remember about three instances in the last several years where a scrum has gone against the feed. It is no longer a contest.

In the modern game, when a scrum is lost, it is due to a brain explosion on behalf of a halfback who has failed to dribble a ball under the legs of his second rowers (while all the forwards in the pack are having a quiet rest break).

I do understand the arguments against the scrum; I just disagree with them all.

Anthony Miniciello tries to get into a scrum. (AAP Image/Action Photographics, Colin Whelan)

Everyone thought it was a bit unattractive to see a scrum pack down and collapse six times in a row. Or be forced of a mark and wander around a field like a drunken elephant. Or be repacked repeatedly because the feed was biased. But the current situation is even more unattractive.

Instead of a violent coming together of big men the scrum has turned into a polite little tea party. Not just a joke but an embarrassing one at that.

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Why have rules that are no longer enforced? Why keep the scrum in the game if it is not serving its original purpose? Or any purpose at all?

Scrums no longer wander off a mark, or collapse, because they no longer do anything but allow for a break in play prior to forcing the forwards to come together for a spot of polite conversation.

Nobody ever gets pinged for feeding a scrum incorrectly, wandering off a mark, collapsing a scrum, or failing to bind, because scrums no longer serve any apparent purpose.

Once upon a time much of the appeal of the NRL was to witness the battle of strength between big men packing down and giving it their all. But that has simply disappeared. There is barely any real need for behemoths in the modern game.

It no longer matters what sort of weight might be behind a scrum because they simply don’t pack-down anymore. Grunt has turned into mild grimace.

Instead of being focused on being able to exert exquisite pressure, every member of a modern pack is looking to be able to break as quickly as possible and return to the line. To return to being half-arsed back-rowers.

I don’t mean that we have to return to the bad old days of the late 70s when often half of a game would be devoted to herding a pack of unruly players around a park. But surely we can return to a situation where the scrum actually means something?

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Surely we can require that six men bind to the scrum. Surely we can require that the feed be honest. Surely we can require that there be an actual contest of strength.

With two refs on the park there are now enough eyes to be able to wrangle the players. Plus we don’t have to fall into the trap that so queered the game in the 70s. Instead we can be strict with the rules and simply award a penalty, at once, if a scrum is pulled down, wanders, or is fed incorrectly.

We don’t have to return to the endless repacking and tending of every scrum – but we do have to recognise that the current situation is simply stupid. Without a real scrum the game is less than it once was. And why retain the scrum if it is nothing more than an ornament to the game?

Surely it is time to either piss or get off the pot? We need to either eliminate the scrum or start enforcing a few of the rules regarding pack, bind and feed.

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