Who will win the Super Bowl Adam?
“Who dat? Who dat? Who dat say dey gonna beat dem Saints?”
Freezing weather, overzealous security staff and a lousy spectacle interrupted by incessantly obnoxious commercials – the NFL sucks.
A casual and neutral observer I recently attended my first match in Louisiana.
An uninspired New Orleans Saints beat a hapless New York Giants outfit 31-19. The horns and cheerleaders were more exciting than the football.
I arrive outside the Superdome early anticipating a vibrant tailgate party on the concourse. Heavy rain washes this prospect away.
With nothing better to do I decide to head inside the stadium only to be intercepted by security.
My backpack is not permitted in the arena. It must be a clear see-through item, mine is black.
I plead mercy with the security guard, a belligerent balding beast of a man, explaining I have come from New Zealand, the last place on earth before humanity stops, to let me in.
“Can you store my bag in an office please?” I ask.
“NFL policy permits no bags inside the stadium or storage of bags by the franchise,” he responds.
“Yes I understand but how come the merchandise store is selling black logoed backpacks?” I enquire.
“Look don’t argue with me, you don’t want the alternative do you?” the security guard growls.
Grumbling obscenities under my breath I beat a hasty retreat ordering an Uber back to my accommodation ten miles away to relieve myself of my bag.
An elderly man named Ullrich picks me up and notices I am grumpy and flustered. He asks me what am I doing in New Orleans? I respond I am going to the Saints, but I struggle to understand the fuss.
Ullrich’s eyes lighten up upon hearing the Saints.
“Son, see that signpost over there?” Ulrich asks pointing at 9 o’clock.
“I used to sell programs to Saints games on that corner,” he explains.
“I was 18 years old in 1967 when the Saints played their first game.” Ulrich continues.
“We lost to the Los Angeles Rams 27-13 at Tulane Stadium. Rookie John Gilliam scored a 94-yard touchdown with the first touch of the ball in Saints history. Man that was exciting.”
“In 1970 we beat the Denver Broncos 19-17 with the last play of the game. Tom Dempsey kicked a record 63-yard field goal. Unbelievable.”
“1975: We played our first game in the Superdome. We got whipped by the Cincinnati Bengals,” Ulrich moans.
“22 years. It took us 22 years to have a winning season.” Ulrich elaborates.
(Photo by: 2017 Nick Cammett/Diamond Images/Getty Images)
“Man we were so bad people used to wear paper bags over their heads at home games. We were the ‘Aints’ rather than the ‘Saints’,” Ulrich moans.
“We are the team that loses the unloseable game,” Ulrich rues.
This sounds familiar I interrupt. The Hurricanes rugby team at home are exactly the same.
Fully engaged I ask about famous chokes.
“How long ya got?” Ulrich brisks.
What’s that statue about around Entrance A? I ask.
“Oh man,” Ulrich exclaims.
In 2006 the Saints played their first game at the Superdome since Hurricane Katrina. Less than two minutes into the game against the Atlanta Falcons, the Saints’ fiercest rivals, Steve Gleason burst up the middle of the Falcons’ line to block a punt. This I learn is a brave, rare and inspiring play and helped New Orleans win the match.
Like the Hurricanes the Saints are regularly competitive now. In 2009 they won the Super Bowl for the first and only time.
“What do remember about that Ulrich?”
“Oh man. That was one goddamn party. I didn’t see my wife for four days,” Ulrich roars with laughter.
“Drew Brees, what an arm.”
“Alvin Kamara, he can can really motor.”
“Cameron Jordan, he’s a beast of a tackler.”
Beers, banter and high-fives the locals are impressed by my apparent knowledge of the game.
New Orleans – the big easy.
Thanks Ulrich
“Who dat? Who dat? Who dat say dey gonna beat dem Saints?”
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