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The Top five times 'good' did not triumph over 'evil'

10th July, 2008
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10th July, 2008
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Rafael Nadal beats five-time defending champion Roger Federer - photo via Foxsports

This column started as a list of sportspeople united by some feature other than competence. Now it has gone small-c catholic in a silent tribute to next week’s World Youth Day at Randwick Racecourse, which itself rockets to Number One in the list of Top 5 Excuses For Cancellation of Race 4.

In the canon of this broader sporting church, here is my The Top five times ‘good’ did not triumph over ‘evil’.

1. Nadal v. Federer, Wimbledon 2008 (c)
Tennis pundits who suggested this was the greatest tennis match of all time were presumably also upset that the Death Star was vandalised by local youths just when its architectural bravery was becoming apparent (this analogy assumes ‘local’ includes Tatooine). Sure, Nadal can play, was gracious in victory and personally thanked me for motivating him with last week’s remark about frantic Iberian bum-picking, but I am unashamedly a Federer fan and was disappointed he didn’t win. Give me Borg beating McEnroe any day.

2. Australia v. Iran, 1997
If Nadal v. Federer is this week’s captain, it is Kim Hughes to this disaster’s Allan Border. From the high, just days earlier, of Johns and Darren Albert stealing the ARL Grand Final, to the low of the MCG net-snipping fiasco and Iran’s 2 late goals, this was as bad as it gets.

3. Arsenal v Liverpool, final day, 1988-89 season
Tony Adams, George Graham and most of all Michael Thomas. His last-minute goal sucked the mojo out of Liverpool (the 1989-90 title an aberration) and it remains missing to this day.

4. Thomson c. Miller b. Botham, MCG 1982
At one end of the virtue scale, 1982 was the year of Sterling, Kenny, Grothe, Ella and Cronin, plus Neil Hunt and Paul Taylor. At other end it was the year of Ian Botham, Chris Tavare and Geoff Miller. When Tavare fumbled the thick edge from Thommo’s hopeful waft we thought God was punishing him for his tedious batting. However no deity worth his salt would reward Botham’s pies and Miller’s wristband restricted offspin with a second-chance catch broke a 10-year-old’s heart.

5. Italy v. Australia, FIFA World Cup 2006
The only redeeming feature of this match was that I didn’t watch it. Stuck on a plane mid-Pacific, I remember clearly the Aussie pilot’s announcement that it was “Good news! It is still nil-all with only a few minutes to play”. In that zone of vivid thought between waking and sleep, my mind bet everything it owned that an azure-shirted match-fixer would take a dive in the area. And so, goddammit, it proved.

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