The book on How To Lose An Ashes Series

By James Mortimer / Roar Guru

You would think that with just one Ashes triumph since 1989, England would have approached the first Test on red alert, DEFCON 1, and all other battle station analogies.

But they clearly walked into the first Test at Cardiff thinking that an Australian team without some of the greatest players of all time would be a fairly easy proposition for them.

After all, they had just defeated the calypso kings, the West Indies, by ten wickets in the first Test and by an innings and 83 runs in the second. The same West Indian team that is barely seventh on the Test rankings, and in complete disarray, now striking over collective pay issues.

The English also made the right noises coming into the Tests acknowledging that, despite the lack of Shane Warne, Glenn McGrath, Adam Gilchrist, Matt Hayden, Justin Langer and Damien Martyn among others (my god, what a collection of players!), this was still Australia: ‘we know what we are up against’, and so forth.

They also said that focus, discipline and intensity would win this series.

But they didn’t back any of this up.

There were some grave underestimations on the part of the English as well.

They forgot that Australian cricketers have long memories, and the pain of the 2005 Ashes loss, while somewhat forgotten with the 2007 whitewash, would only be erased with a statement made back on the hallowed grounds of England.

England forgot that there was still some very good players in this Australian team, thinking that with Australia’s only 300 wicket taker (they used to have two 500 plus bowlers), Brett Lee, out as well, it would be a pretty simple task.

After all, the entire Australian bowling attack had barely 40 Tests between them, with over half of them belonging to Mitchell Johnson.

They forgot that captain Ricky Ponting, for all the criticisms levelled at him about his captaincy, is still one of the finest batsmen in the game, and history will remember him as one of the greats with a blade.

Equally, while he is not recognised by many as the captain that Allan Border or Steve Waugh was, he still has the same sheer bloody mindedness evident in his predecessors.

And while it is not the swaggering front five – all with 50 plus Test averages – batting line up that haunted the world’s bowlers for years. It is still a competent Test line.

While Michael Hussey continues to be out of form (it is almost mocking to call him Mr Cricket now), the talents of vice-captain Michael Clarke, Brad Haddin, and Marcus North will now surely be noted by England.

But most importantly, this was an Australian side that has had to scrap their way through toughest cricketing theatres in the last twelve months.

You could not ask for a more uncompromising preparation than India in the subcontinent, South Africa beating you on the previously unbeatable Australian soil, and having a return series against the same team.

England showed a borderline arrogance throughout this match.

No batsmen knuckled down and dominated the novice tourist attack. For every batsman to reach double figures is one thing. But for seven players to reach 30 and three to pass 50, and not score a hundred in an Ashes Test match is a cardinal sin.

It was the same with their bowling.

To not use Freddie Flintoff as an opening strike weapon, when he is your best bowler, is a terrible transgression.

Their attack was in stark contrast to Australia’s, as players who had never played in an Ashes contest bowled with the determination and spirit that wins Test matches. If Johnson can find the form of a few months ago, it will be a fearsome attack if and when Lee returns.

The most telling signal as to England’s mindset was at the end of the match.

An admittedly weaker Australia, after dominating for close to four out of five days, could not quite kill the English off, but came very close. A Test match draw.

And what does England do? Celebrate like they have won the Ashes.

If England is to win this series on home soil, they will need to pull their heads in, and very fast.

The Crowd Says:

2009-07-19T14:54:12+00:00

Colin N

Guest


"And what does England do? Celebrate like they have won the Ashes" Actually, the fans did, yes, but that's to be expected. But the players realised how poorly they played and although there was obvious relief, I didn't see the overjoyed celebrations comparable to Australia four years ago at Old Trafford. The difference between then and now is that England went onto win at Trent Bridge and Australia are currently struggling. It also wasn't arrogance that caused England's performance at Cardiff, it seems like a typical stereotypical view to me. I could switch that round to the Australians on this site who said that England had only one world class fielder, a poor middle order and an untested bowling attack against the top sides. They also raved about Mitchell Johnson and Phillip Hughes. Australia were far better than England in Cardiff and England were poor, very poor in fact. At Lords, many of the Australians have been out to poor shots and a couple of poor umpiring decisions, but England have bowled to plans (some have worked, some haven't, such as Broads 'bouncathon' to Siddle) and bowled quite well. Now is that Australia arrogance? "England forgot that there was still some very good players in this Australian team, thinking that with Australia’s only 300 wicket taker (they used to have two 500 plus bowlers), Brett Lee, out as well, it would be a pretty simple task." Have you seen the media attention Hughes and Johnson got, because we rated them very highly? I'm sure the English players do as well, or did before the series. The only player the English media have dismissed is Hauritz. "To not use Freddie Flintoff as an opening strike weapon, when he is your best bowler, is a terrible transgression Only as terrible as breaking up a good opening partnership between Broad and Anderson, who performed very well against the West Indies. You adapt to these situations and that's what Strauss has done. He's no Michael Vaughen, but he's a competent captain. Re: the spirit of cricket. What about Ricky Pointing's disrespect to the England side when they had just been humiliated 5-0 in 2007? What about when he continuinely argues with the umpire, and his outrage at the decision not to give Collingwood out, when it was a correct decision? Is that in the spirit of cricket? He kept preaching this last series, despite using four word expletives towards Duncan Fletcher, which to me isn't in the spirit of cricket.

2009-07-16T06:23:45+00:00

Lewie

Guest


Dave's right you know

2009-07-16T00:16:57+00:00

Dave

Guest


Against the laws or the spirit ? Rowdy Against the laws http://www.lords.org/laws-and-spirit/laws-of-cricket/laws/law-42-fair-and-unfair-play,68,AR.html law 42 part 10 10. Batsman wasting time It is unfair for a batsman to waste time. In normal circumstances the striker should always be ready to take strike when the bowler is ready to start his run up. (a) Should either batsman waste time by failing to meet this requirement, or in any other way, the following procedure shall be adopted. At the first instance, either before the bowler starts his run up or when the ball is dead, as appropriate, the umpire shall (i) warn the batsman and indicate that this is a first and final warning. This warning shall continue to apply throughout the innings. The umpire shall so inform each incoming batsman. (ii) inform the other umpire, the other batsman and the captain of the fielding side of what has occurred. (iii) inform the captain of the batting side as soon as practicable. (b) if there is any further time wasting by any batsman in that innings, the umpire shall, at the appropriate time while the ball is dead (i) award 5 penalty runs to the fielding side. See 17 below. (ii) inform the other umpire, the other batsman, the captain of the fielding side and, as soon as practicable, the captain of the batting side of what has occurred. (iii) report the occurrence, with the other umpire, as soon as possible to the Executive of the batting side and to any Governing Body responsible for the match, who shall take such action as is considered appropriate against the captain and player or players and, if appropriate, the team concerned.

2009-07-15T23:33:21+00:00

Brett McKay

Guest


Jameswm, I actually thought you and James Mort. were one and the same!!

2009-07-15T23:29:52+00:00

Jameswm

Guest


James - you missed the Tour de France and British Open golf.

2009-07-15T10:09:21+00:00

Rowdy

Guest


"What the English did was against the laws of the game and no the Australians wouldn’t have done it and what does it have to with underarm?" Against the laws or the spirit ? Get your eye tested. If you seriously think Australia wouldn't have done the same and are blameless on the spirit of the game thing, then you must have started watching the game just after tea on the last day of the Cardiff test.

2009-07-15T09:46:08+00:00

Dave

Guest


mart What the English did was against the laws of the game and no the Australians wouldn’t have done it and what does it have to with underarm? If the Australians did it imagine the self loathing Balmain basketweavers or the born to rule conservatives form the north shore and the English and roebuck. You would never had heard the end of it.

2009-07-15T09:08:35+00:00

Dave

Guest


Sheek One of the problems is that as you get older youve seen it all before. when you young its all new. i myself will never watch another rugby game but again if you are going to talk about the 70’s, this ashes series is my popular and more widely watched/followed than the ones of 72 and 77. The game just keeps getting bigger

2009-07-15T06:45:42+00:00

sheek

Guest


James, You can have too much of a good thing. I think part of the problem with sports today is this - familiarity breeds contempt. Quantity over quality. Back in the 70s, I counted the months, weeks & days to the next series, either cricket or rugby, or anything else that took my fancy. In the meantime, I soaked up everything I could from the just completed series. These days, it's a case of "miss a test, no worries, there's another next week"....."miss a series, no worries, there's another next month". One test meshes into the next, one series meshes into the next. There's so much going on, it's impossible to keep track of it all, & all the other things in your life as well. So what do we do? We drift in & out of our consciousness of what's happening in any particular sport. ' We become 'acquaintances' with sports, rather than the 'good friends' we used o be. In this info-tainment era, we can get all the stats we want off the internet, but our first-hand knowledge becomes hazy. Anyway, pardon the rant. Ashes 2009? I really couldn't care less - I'll follow it casually, but not with the passion I once had.

2009-07-15T05:59:16+00:00

mart

Guest


Sorry - James not Dave (apolgies James !)

2009-07-15T05:57:45+00:00

mart

Guest


Sheek - agree 100%. Great post. Dave - as Fisher Price says and, er, underarm bowling anyone ? Guys, I'd have liked us to knock over that last wicket too but, as was brilliantly said on The Back Page on Fox last night, yes the Poms were underhand but if we can't knock over a last wicket pair on a very turning pitch in the last hour of the last day, well......... Finally - for Ponting to even bring up "Spirit of Cricket" (isn't that a Qantas plane ?) beggars belief given the behaviour of the team on his watch in recent times.....

2009-07-15T03:46:39+00:00

FIsher Price

Guest


Not sure I'm with you on your closing point, James - If you recall, Australia celebrated like they'd won/held the Ashes after a day lost to rain helped them draw in Manchester in 2005.

2009-07-15T02:49:31+00:00

Dave

Guest


Crowds are up in England though Record crowds for county matches in 2008• Over 2.2 million people watched domestic cricket last summer • Figures represent a 10% increase year on year http://www.guardian.co.uk/sport/2009/jan/22/ecb-announce-spectator-increase

2009-07-15T02:41:13+00:00

James Mortimer

Guest


Cheers for the compliment Brett. Sheek, I read an interesting piece on the wonderful cricket site CricInfo (which, curiously, is one of the biggest sites in the world - period) stating that in England coverage for cricket has been in a steady freefall since 2007. I liken this to living in New Zealand when the All Blacks lost, such a result would be lucky to get one article. But win, and it would cover 5-6 pages. It's an interesting point you refer to about such golden ages. I'm in my thirties, so my first "viewed" memories of sport were of All Black cavalier tours and Richard Hadlee tearing apart Australian teams. From there I spent a huge portion of my life viewing sport, including having a run in the mid nineties where I had season passes to Wellington rugby, cricket, netball, and of course motor racing, being lucky enough to witness the greatest street racing competition I have ever witnessed, the now defunct Nissan Mobil 500 (god, the debut of the Nissan "Godzilla" still sends goosebumps down my spine). However, I still regard sport as being in a golden age. But I think a large part of this corresponds with the fact that I now essentially "work in the industry" being blessed enough to have been employed by two rugby organisations of late, including writing for allblacks.com - something even a few months on I consistently pinch myself about and giggle like a ****head. But, I do see it as a valid point you make. I used to watch cricket religously, but to be honest have watched preciously little in the last year or two. Perhaps that is why this Ashes contest has appealed to so many. When was the last time we watched some glorious drama? As for rugby, I do see many peoples points regarding technicians and even personalities. Ironically, sportsman are payed the most money by a long way in history, but am I alone in thinking when listening to an interview "sure, you are a good player, but shouldn't you have a personality to be classed as a superstar". David Beckham stands out here. So in essence, I think Sheek we are on the same point in the fact that there is a bit of flamboyance lacking in our great passion of sport - but for me, I see this as an opportunity :) (think there is potential for a pure extrovert like myself) But, I think of the next few days, for example. State of Origin tonight British Lions first test replay early tomorrow morning 2nd Ashes test tomorrow night Two Currie Cup replays Friday afternoon Tri Nations Bledisloe Cup opener sat night And honestly mate, life is bloody good.

2009-07-15T01:28:21+00:00

sheek

Guest


Dave, Okay, I'll take that back, probably swallow it with a nice shiraz this evening.

2009-07-15T01:05:18+00:00

Brett McKay

Guest


great piece James. It's been said by plenty this week, but I'm still struggling to understand by England (and not just the players and commentators, the whole country!) seems to be so preoccupied by the events of 2005. Forget 1882, you'd swear The Ashes were born in 2005, and obviously weren't contested in 2006/07. I'm starting to wonder if the only way to bring this continued delusion to a halt is to be up 2-0 by the time we get to Headingley...

2009-07-15T00:28:38+00:00

jonno

Guest


England did show poor sportsmanship. That is what time wasting is. It is not 'rich' to complain about it. It is called cheating. England are by no means saints, they are quite hypocritical. I seem to remember their press claiming Mathew Hayden 'spat' on a young boy in the crowd. Were those lies sportsmanlike?

2009-07-15T00:18:25+00:00

Dave

Guest


sheek Cricket is booming and ratings and crowds are up. if you compare the English crowds from the 60's you will see that the game just keeps growing in popularity. The ashes of 89,93,97,2001 had nowhere near the following that 2005 and 2009 has had. And no the Australians have not done anything like what the English did which irrespective of any “sportsmanship” thing was against the rules/laws

2009-07-15T00:01:42+00:00

sheek

Guest


You know James, Perhaps I'm showing my age here, but I'm thankful I was able to watch most sports from about the mid-60s to say mid-2000s. I call it the 'golden age' of sport. Sport was becoming mass-produced on TV, but you still had plenty of variety in personalities & styles. Today sport is different, & I don't know if it's any better. Sure, there's 24/7 blanket coverage of any sport you desire. The players are bigger, stronger, faster but are they really better technicians of the game? I now can see more rugby union than at any time in my life, but I still prefer many of the guys who ran around in the 70s, 80s & 90s. Homogeneity (bland sameness) hadn't yet set in, as it has now. With cricket, the 2005 series was an absolute cracker, but most of everything else around it has been bland - like a lone island in the vast seas of either the Pacific or Indian oceans. I don't think Englishmen love their cricket anymore, especially test cricket, not like they used to, or like the Aussies (most of whose fans are just hanging on). The world of sport is changing, whether for better or worse, I don't know. But I'm none too impressed with what I'm witnessing. Maybe for me, more or less, the world of sport as I knew it, ended on either 31/12/99 or 31/12/00, depending on when you believe a century starts & ends! On another point, it's rich of Ponting to complain about poor sportsmanship from England. As if Australia would have done differently. And as if the Aussies are saints themselves! They've perfected the art of being hard-nosed bad-asses.

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