Well, it’s been a sorry few days in Melbourne for Australian fans – though for lovers of cricket in general, it’s been hard not to enjoy what England have served up in this Boxing Day Test. Since the drop of the coin on Sunday morning, anything and everything has gone right for Andrew Strauss.
Right call, right replacement bowler, right use of the conditions, and right response with the bat. All just on the first day.
Come the second day, it was Brisbane and/or Adelaide revisited as the English top order just batted and batted and batted. A lead of 346 at the end of the second day is a pretty handy couple of days of cricket.
On the third morning though, the Australians jumped out of the blocks first. Peter Siddle removed Matt Prior, the man spared by video review of ‘that no-ball’ from Mitch Johnson, in the sixth over of the day, some 80 runs after what turned out to be an expensive moment for Ricky Ponting.
Prior’s dismissal triggered something of a collapse, and despite some enterprise from Graeme Swann, England lost 5/54 to be all out 513. Jonathan Trott would finish 168 not out and now runs with an Alistair Cook-esque series average.
But in the scheme of things, this was just a mere hiccup.
Australia would need a mammoth 416 just to make England bat again, and after 98 all out midway through Boxing Day, that would seem a long way away.
Shane Watson and Phillip Hughes started in ominous fashion, and were still ticking along at better than five-an-over into the eleventh. “At this rate, they should lead by 350 tomorrow night,” my well-meaning but somewhat optimistic colleague, Vinay Verma, uttered at the time.
If only. If this Test is even close to still going at stumps tonight, I will be both shocked and stunned. As would England, I’d wager.
However, the columnist’s curse proved than it can also work at the subconscious level, for just as I was thinking that Hughes was looking more stable and solid than at any other point in his return innings – and even daring not to speak this observation aloud – he was needlessly run out by yet another shocking Shane Watson call.
Later in the post-match, Watson would admit, even if only begrudgingly so, that Hughes’ run out “probably was my fault, yeah” – and his calling is surely getting to the point of becoming an issue for the side.
Just as Simon Katich did in Adelaide, Hughes found himself called through by Watson after both batsmen had stuttered their run, and was eventually out of his ground by some distance. England ‘keeper Prior undoubtedly contributed to the distance of the run out by cleverly taking the ball in front of the stumps, but nevertheless, there was always doubt about the run.
And whenever that is the case, Hughes simply must learn to say ‘no’, regardless of how senior or on whatever score his partner is.
Watson further added to an already frustrating time for the Australian faithful in the super-impressive third day crowd by getting out in the fifties yet again, this time thrusting only a pad forward to a middle-stump-bound Tim Bresnan in-swinger.
Sadly, that wasn’t the last piece of poor judgement in this dismissal; for reasons I can neither fathom nor even guess, Watson referred the decision upstairs for a second opinion. Once discovered that Bresnan had neither no-balled nor miraculously morphed into a left-armer, Watson was again the subject of a skyward finger.
It quickly emerged in various circles that Watson’s fifties-to-centuries conversion is now at a touch over 11 per cent, which is generally handy for a batting all-rounder, but perhaps not so much when said batting all-rounder features at the top of the order.
Bresnan had his wind up by this stage, and after a determined period from the Australian captain, the Yorkshireman enticed Ponting to spar outside off to a ball Bresnan later described as “nothing special,” only to see a massive inside edge redirect it stumpwards.
Ponting was a dejected man as he trudged off the MCG, and people in these parts would be right to ask if we’ve seen the last of the best batsman of this generation on this hallowed ground. I quite seriously wonder if we’ll now see an announcement made in these next few days prior to Sydney.
Mike Hussey proved he is human again by sending an ambitious drive to Ian Bell in the covers, and with him gone, the Barmy Army lifted in perfect relativity to the deflating Australian fans.
At this time, I suggested to my modest Twitter crowd, “If Clarke has any aspirations for the top job, and likewise Smith as a Test No.6, they simply both MUST last to stumps. Just must.”
Sadly, neither could, and with them gone, so are all of Australia’s faint hopes of avoiding a second innings-defeat in this Ashes series.
Just as Mike Gatting’s team did in 1986, Andrew Strauss’ men will now also secure the Ashes in Melbourne. While Gatting’s lot did it inside three days, only a miracle will prevent Strauss’ team doing it well inside four.
And fair play to them.
After the small stumble in Perth, England’s sheer dominance in this series has once again returned to the fore. Simply put, they have been the better team in almost all the key moments in this series.
For Australia, the post-mortems will begin well before the body is pronounced dead. The obituaries may not even wait for Sydney.
Fisher Price
Guest
Australia is lucky Graeme Onions is injured (...).
Fisher Price
Guest
Sour grapes.
Colin N
Guest
"and the 1st innings of the ‘Gabba test on a pitch that a Sydney 3rd grader could have scored a century on." Like Adelaide then?
Long On
Guest
I agree with you on NSW centricity effecting cricket selection. The publicity that Maddison is getting is outrageous and he probably will be in the team before long even if he hasn’t earned it. The worse thing is it is counterproductive, it can destroy young cricketers before they are ready. Hughes should be dropped from the test team, this will be the third time that has happened and means he may never play test cricket again. He should had been forced to score runs at shield level, like Katich had to. His technical flaws should have been sorted out at first class level and not the test team in an Ashes series. Hughes batting average this season said he wasn’t ready. It is a fundamental thing, having to earn your place. It should not be about some young bloke from NSW having a purple patch in Shield cricket getting into the team.
Brendon
Guest
For your sake I hope Australia doesn't win in Sydney then you will look like a complete goose. 2-2. WE dominated all of Perth and the 1st innings of the 'Gabba test on a pitch that a Sydney 3rd grader could have scored a century on. The curator of the 'Gabba has a lot to answer for preparing a ridiculously fat and placid pitch so the game would go for 5 days for the $$$. If anyone's head needs to rolls its the idiot (even by Queensland's low standards) who prepared the 1st test pitch. We pretty much lost the Ashes when we drew at Fortress 'Gabba. Wait, maybe it was Ponting's fault that the Gabba pitch was so flat? Yeah, lets blame Ponting. Its what all the cool kids do. We've had 2 bad tests so lets hit the panic button. p.s. Ponting still has a winning record as captain against England. 8-6 with 5 drawn tests.
dasilva
Guest
Bit too early to rule out India They just even the series against South Africa and have a chance to win the decider Remember that this Indian team is the only team in the world that defeated England home and away which Australia is finding out is a pretty tough task.
plugger
Guest
It was a humorous retort to "anti-Australian". I'm a humourist, not a racist. By the way, if you have been reading this site you would have noticed that I have supported Khawaja more than once to be in the side. People are so touchy and precious these days. I have Italians, Aborigines and Anglo-Indians in my extended family.
Timmuh
Guest
If fit, I would give Katich the captaincy. Ponting should not have played in Melbourne, and is still talking about "should be fit" for Sydney. Rest him, until about halfway through the limited overs series. If Katich isn't fit, make Hussey captain with Katich tio take over for the next series. Katich (c) Watson D Huusey M Hussey Khawaja Ferguson (I have doubts, not in great form, but others aren't standing up; I hate to say it maybe even McDonald could go in) Haddin Johnson (just, his bad is too bad to keep carrying, one good match every two years is not good enough) Hauritz (sadly, still the bets spinner we have, and just sneaks in for Sydney ahead of playing four seamers) Siddle Copeland Ponting return as a batsman only, not captain, at number 5 or 6 for the next series; and Clarke back in if he starts to score a few runs. Clarke seems to have got complacent, isn't scoring runs, so give him the jolt of an axing. He has the ability to bounce back and make runs at Test level, he just needs to actually show it again and it might take a spell out of the side for that to happen.
Brett McKay
Expert
yep, agree James. There's a lot of parallels between now and the last time Australia lost the Ashes too, so it's not as if this is all foreign territory. Last time around, Australia lost three genuine greats of the game, went through a tough patch, lost the Ashes at home, and then won the World Cup on the subcontinent less than six months later, and started a rise to the top of the tree. Here's to history repeating....
Lolly
Guest
We don't have the bowlers, they do. That's enough to win a series. That makes a team better than the other. Sure our batsmen look like they have lost their marbles and have no confidence, but they haven't been given too many freebies out there. Unless you factor in Finn and at times, Swann (but that's only because Hussey has handled them both so well.)
Lolly
Guest
Their bowling is more accurate and they do more with the ball. That's good bowling in anyone's books. Tim Bresnan isn't anything to shout home about but he is willing to just keep plugging away accurately. How many of our guys are?
Lolly
Guest
He'll run through tail-enders like butter off a hot knife. Our lot wouldn't stand a chance. I saw him run out Johnson last summer on one of Johnson's occasional spells of looking very good with the bat. You could see that neither of them knew what was going on even though it was Watson's call. I think he takes off sometimes without calling. Seriously.
Nambucco Deliria
Guest
And this from an Australian, born and raised in that well known hotbed of tolerance, Australia. I suppose, plugger, that a century from that 'Paki' Khawaja in Sydney won't count because he isn't true blue redneck stock?
Lolly
Guest
In England, I can't get the ABC coverage even online. I can get state games though. Luckily, the TMS crew in England are reasonably good as long as Agnew isn't commentating. He's a good interviewer and presenter but his analysis skills are poor, he never really paints a picture for you. I'm still a fan of Boycs though, his analysis skils (when he isn't being nasty) are excellent.
Colin N
Guest
"England were lucky that Australia had no spinner. I think Brett you should take that into account" I think Australia were lucky that England didn't have better players than them between 1989 and 2004. I think you should take that into account when considering all those defeats England suffered.........................
Brett McKay
Expert
in-bred Kiwis??
jamesb
Guest
Oh yeah on face value i agree Brett, Australia has been outplayed by England, it's just that what frustrates me as an Aussie supporter is that England retained the ashes without having to deal with a decent opposition spinner. It's not all doom and gloom for Aussie cricket. I think this ashes defeat is a blessing in disguise. This team has been in decline for 4 years. I just hope Aussie cricket can draw a line in the sand now and say, enough is enough we are going to go in a different direction. That means change of captain and selecting young players or players with experienced that deserve a chance. Players like Khawaja at No. 3, Cam white at No.6, even a trent copeland is worth a try. And hopefully in 12 to 18 months time players like O'Keefe, Boyce, Maddison, Lynn, Duffield-fast bowler from W.A and also hughes and smith can come through. I'm sure during that time frame other players would come through. Victoria I believe have few decent youngsters in ryan Carters and Alex Keath which Victoria have high hopes for It's time to stop the decline, and start the rise again.
plugger
Guest
Yes. Slater could have been referring to that reluctance, that's true. I wouldn't condemn him at all.
plugger
Guest
And a one.., and a two... (in 4/4 time, with a bouncy foxtrot): You've got the whole world in your team, you've got the whole world in your team. You've got Saffers and Pakis in your team; you've got Paddies and Punjis in your team; you've got in-bred Kiwis in your team; you've got the whole world in your team.
Brett McKay
Expert
But James, what could have been means nothing right now, only what happened. Spinner or no spinner, Australia have been outplayed, it's all there in plain sight. That said, I've been keeping an eye (albeit an irregular eye) on Cameron Boyce, and I happen to agree with you on that front. He first came to my attention researching for a piece on the Futures League at the start of last season, and his numbers have been on the improve since then. There's a few 19-21yo spinners popping around the country all of a sudden, so in five years time (or so) Australia may have some very decent spin options...