Why France should get up early on Sunday

French sports daily l’Equipe on Saturday devoted its entire front page to 50 reasons why French ppeople should set their alarms early on Sunday morning to watch the World Cup final against New Zealand.

Among the more tongue-in-cheek suggestions were No.5: “To confirm that it really is France that are taking on New Zealand”, or No.42: “To perform the Haka with my mother-in-law”.

To counterbalance the politically-incorrect No.30 “Because in the morning, my wife looks like an All Black”, No.31 suggested: “Because 30 well built boys make a change from my husband, in the morning, going to bed and at every other moment of the day”.

The list, appearing under the headline “Why you should get up early tomorrow”, kicked off with the simple fact that Sunday’s final at Auckland’s Eden Park “is a historic moment”.

No.2, with a nod to the general perception that the All Blacks are hot favourites to beat a side that has lost twice en route to the final, stated: “Because sport is not an exact science”.

There was some wishful thinking too, as in “So as to be on the Champs-Elysees on time when the (French) victory will be celebrated” or “Because (wing) Vincent Clerc is going to score a try from 80 metres”, or even “To put the champagne on ice”.

No.45 (“Because at least it won’t be Spain who win”) harked back to France’s appearance in the 2006 FIFA World Cup final in Berlin.

In a reason that would have appealed to French existentialist Jean-Paul Sartre No.48 said simply: “Why not?”

The list concluded with a call to arms, irrespective of what lies in store on the battlefield of Auckland on Sunday: “Because I support my team right to the end”.