In these tough economic times of GFCs and KPIs, potential employees everywhere are forced to keep their noses clean in an effort to land meaningful employment.
That is, unless you want a gig playing in the NRL.
Yet again proving that the world of professional sports exists in some bizarro universe to the rest of society, it has recently come to light that the interview process for a position on an NRL team is the opposite of what it is for the rest of us poor schmucks.
That is, incredibly fun!
For everyone not born in Downton Abbey, applying for jobs is a massive drag. Opportunities are scarce, and when they pop up you have to have everything ready to go.
The mountains of paperwork, the groomed corporate image, semi-reliable referees who are willing to talk you up and not just go off on tangents about your hilariously disastrous run in the work footy tipping comp.
It is nerve-wracking stuff.
As a talented footballer though you can have a haircut that would frighten small children, a gaggle of past employers bemoaning the day you darkened their doorstep and used your paperwork for a roll-your-own in the lobby and it wouldn’t really matter.
All that matters is how good a player you are, and if you’ve spent your career basically baring your buttocks at all that is good and decent, well….you’re still a good player right?
None of this is new of course. However certain machinations in rugby league over the last decade have exacerbated the fact to breaking point.
The first is competition for players. Whereas once a stint in the sticks getting spear tackled on hard country grounds greeted the space cadet player, now the Waratahs or some red faced bloke out Rooty Hill way with more money than sense will give you a run.
And secondly the scrapping of the June 30 deadline has radically shifted how the player market operates.
The old July first mass player signing announcements was undoubtedly a massive sham, however the process of players ricocheting around the league between clubs like heavily tattooed pinballs during the season is just shameful.
And, I believe, open to skulduggery.
There is a Seinfeld episode where to escape a relationship turned stale the character George purposely is caught by his girlfriend picking his nose so that she ends their relationship.
I have become convinced that more and more players have started to purposely “go the pick” with their NRL side.
And why wouldn’t they?
Look at the Broncos Ben Hunt for example. Stuck in reggies, not getting a run when other team’s would happily have him playing NRL, maybe even for more bucks. What incentive is there for him to toe the line or plead for a release when he could go out, get blitzed, do a nude run down Caxton St before mumbling a half-arsed apology then lead out the Dragons next weekend?
Zero.
Same goes for outside players like Kurtley Beale being picked up. Should we really allow desperate NRL sides to buy an entire team during the season? Shouldn’t there be a cut-off point that says team X contains Y players?
Now if the NRL wanted to have a week long mid-year trade window followed by a larger one post-season that could be interesting, but the current system appears to just be rewarding poorly organised clubs and poorly behaved players.
Sure it’s impossible to expect players to forever keep their noses clean, I get that, but if we could give them a reason to get their bloody fingers out of their noses, it might be a step in the right direction.
Follow Chris on Twitter @Vic_Arious
Mantis
Roar Guru
Nothing annoys me more than a player signing for a club whilst still playing for a different club. They should have a transfer window (a la soccer) and have 30 days to sort stuff out. A team can sell a player to another club before he comes off contract, or if not then the player has free reign to negotiate a new contract with that club or become a free agent and test the open market.
Bazzio
Roar Guru
Dragons need to pick AND flick
Bazzio
Roar Guru
Grand Final over = Open Season next year's competition Begins = Doors Closed
Bigjohn
Guest
I do not like Dugan, but I dislike Wallace even more.
Hansoloai
Guest
I sure hope the Broncos sign Dugan...
phascolomis
Guest
So trapped players should demonstrate a little nostril penetration, and perhaps, if they don't try this already, do what George once did at the gym : piss in the shower ! Hey I reckon I would make a great player manager.
xaviercrane
Roar Rookie
"Was there any nostril penetration?" XD
xaviercrane
Roar Rookie
This reminds me of a guy I know who once went surfing for 3hrs on Valentine's day so his girlfriend would dump him
Dean - Surry Hills
Guest
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RU3Q4nRWq7I
Norfolk Enchants
Guest
After watching the tigers tonight I am convinced that Adam Blair has been going "the pick" ever since joining the club
Victor the very unattractive man
Guest
Never get a pick and a scratch mixed up
Baloo
Guest
Dragons and Broncos desperately need to pick a winner. The current siuation also hurts teams who do the right thing and go for the opposite of "the pick" ; "the scratch" (ie: get rid of troublesome players)