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As in any subjective exercise such as this – a list ranking the top 100 rugby league players since 1980 – there’ll be good arguments for players under-ranked, over-ranked and, indeed, overlooked.
And certainly as I’ve edited, re-edited and – repeat – edited this piece, I’ve manoeuvred a man or two up and down the list.
What was I thinking putting Gene Miles behind Jesse Bromwich? Shouldn’t Stacey Jones rank higher than Steve Menzies? Should Danny Buderus rank higher than Andrew Ettingshausen? Who’s the better wing man, Manu Vatuvei or Kerry Boustead?
Your list would differ from mine, without question.
But herein lies the beauty – the fun! – of a man-marking mega-list. You remember some wonderful footy players and have a crack at ranking them into a top hundred. And then someone pays you to do it. They would not understand this in the Democratic People’s Republic of North Korea.
Anyway. Last time, we knocked out a list of 30 from number 100 (Mark Geyer) to number 71 (Ben Kennedy). Today we present the next best 25. The 70-46 men. There are some rippers.
70 – Manu Vatuvei
Aptly-named ‘Beast’ of a wing man who rumbles down the flank and scatters would-be tacklers like his great mate Jonah Lomu. Scarier than Evil Dead.
69 – Dean Pay
Super consistent defender and short-ball man, the second-rower was the Blues’ midfield glue. Didn’t speak a lot – didn’t have to.
68 – Jamie Lyon
Athletic and high-skilled centre-three-quarter who became rusted onto Sydney’s northern beaches because it reminds him of a big bush town, except with beaches. Scorer of many, many tries.
67 – Greg Alexander
Super-smooth Panthers halfback with a gliding running style and hot pace who darted around dusty old Penrith Park like a super-smart and agile kelpie-cross among angry barnyard beasts. With Brad Fittler, John Cartwright, Royce Simmons and Kenny Woolfe, “Brandy” is among the greatest of all Panthers.
66 – Kieran Foran
Well-documented recent travails with injury, mental health and a dodgy gambler-cum-star-um-lover have overshadowed the fact that, at his best, Foran is the game’s best five-eighth. Real nous for the game. Super player.
65 – Noel Cleal
When Noel ‘Crusher’ Cleal first came down to Sydney from the NSW bush town of Warialda, he was a wild and woolly-bearded, 110-kilogram pig hunter and part-Yowie. And he could run. So the Roosters devised a ‘move’ which was, essentially, ‘give the ball to Crusher with a run-up’.
If the Chooks won a penalty in the other team’s ten-metre zone, they’d tell Crusher to go back to the halfway line and start running. When he got close and his head of steam was that of a runaway locomotive steam engine, Kevin Hastings would tap the ball on his boot and pass it to Crusher, who would smash through the pack of defenders like a bowling ball through paper pins.
Try-time. And that’s why they called him Crusher.
64 – James Tedesco
The game’s quickest feet. You could power a speedboat with James Tedesco’s feet, hang him on the back like an outboard. You could.
63 – Royce Simmons
Shaped like Ram Man from The Masters of the Universe, this squat, nuggety hooker-forward scored two tries in the 1991 grand final and promised to drink a beer with everyone in Penrith. People are taking him up on this today.
62 – Josh Hodgson
With Cameron Smith and Robbie Farah entering their dotage, Hodgson can lay claim as the best No.9 in rugby league. High-quality service from the ruck base, a nose for the line, 40 tackles – Hodgson is the hooker hookers wanna be.
61 – Jesse Bromwich
Thunder man of the Storm is the game’s premier prop-forward. One of them, anyway. Watching him hit and be hit by Dave Klinger, Matt Scott and all the other mouth-breathing muscle-men, well – don’t go changin’, greatest-game-of-all rugby league.
60 – Mario Fenech
Tough, hyper-competitive hooker-forward who played rugby league like a pig-dog fighting a larger, stronger pig-dog.
59 – James Graham
A hard-knuckled boulder, a golden-haired Irish Viking, a dog warrior with a glowing moon tan, a woolly red beard and a blonde-rust nut, James Graham is all wild eyes and frothy exhortations and passion which makes spit shoot out his gob. Some player.
58 – Robbie Farah
Quick, sneaky, smart and tough, Farah was – still is – a nightmare for lumbering forwards with his quick, sneaky, smart and tough work out of dummy-half.
57 – Des Hasler
Super-fit and wiry-hard halfback who never, ever stopped running. When the referee blew halftime, Hasler would sprint into the dressing room and run around it while the coach was talking, then he would run out again. After the match, he would run home.
56 – Ruben Wiki
Turned up to the Canberra Raiders and played on the wing. Sixteen seasons and 311 games later, he ended up as the front-rower for the New Zealand Warriors. An absolute axe. And an absolute ornament. An ornamental axe. Let’s go with that.
55 – Matt Scott
Closest thing rugby league has to The Thing. A rock-hard Queenslander in the tradition of Shane Webcke.
54 – Gavin Miller
When the Sharks won the minor premiership in 1988, their backline fairly hummed. Andrew Ettingshausen, Mark McGaw, Jon Docking, and a wizzy little halfback called Barry Russell, oo-ee, the Sharks launched long-range endeavours from all over Endeavour Field. But the man making it happen, the man setting all this free-love free, was Gavin Miller.
Carrying the ball in two hands, he was a classic ball-playing back-rower who was described as “mesmerising”. Won the 1989 Rothman’s Medal, which was like the Dally M except sponsored by cigarettes, such were the times.
53 – Paul Sironen
The size of a good-sized Clydesdale, ‘Sirro’ would storm into opposition D-lines like mighty Conan the Barbarian tearing into hordes of… whoever Conan used to rip into. Saxons, maybe. Or druids. Anyway, Sirro ripped in, and people did not like getting in his way. Not no how.
52 – Roger Tuivasa-Sheck
Funkiest feet in rugby league today. Has a step that defies description, but here goes: RTS runs at his opponents, hops into the air, chest-on, and on the way down decides which of his feet to shoot off on, then does so so quickly that the defender’s eye can’t tell which one until old mate’s gone by him. One on one, he could beat Trump’s Great Wall of Mexico.
51 – Gorden Tallis
Frothy crazy man who was once sent off for calling Bill Harrigan a “cheat”, and other times for being a frothy crazy man. Once wrestled NSW fullback Brett Hodgson into touch in a miracle of balance and muscular manoeuvres. Not really one you’d rile on purpose, our Gordie.
50 – Paul Vautin
Flame-haired work-horse back-rower with enough game and footy smarts to captain Australia. Does a lot of head-wobbling on the telly today, but younger footy folks should YouTube some of his work afield. If the aforementioned Paul Sironen was thundering your way, you wanted the little Fat Man helping out. Or better yet, standing between you and Sirro.
49 – Anthony Minichiello
Human pinball who learnt gymnastics as a pup and ran around the footy field like the little Dracula-looking one in The Addams Family off his meds. Known as ‘The Count’ because of his Phoenician nose and propensity to laugh – Ha-ha-haa! – like old mate The Count from Sesame Street. Brett Kenny came up with that one. Nice one, Brett Kenny. We will talk more of you.
48 – Bob Lindner
A tall, long-striding and super-fit footy player, Lindner was the first of the locks they reckoned could play in the centres. Arguably the best lock in the game before Brad Clyde. Arguably? Well, Mark Graham went okay. And Wayne Pearce. And Ray Price. And we will talk more of these people, also. But there’s your post-70s pantheon. And Lindner’s well in the conversation.
47 – Gary Belcher
Well-balanced and high-skilled fullback who was safer at the back than King James’s jewels, old ‘Badge’ was the moustachioed link man between Ricky Stuart, Laurie Daley and Mal Meninga, and whichever wing man was lucky enough to be profiting from the work of the superstars inside. Super player.
46 – Steve Menzies
Tall, free-running and fit back-rower whose combination with Cliff Lyons and expert knowledge of how to play rugby league yielded him 180 tries, second only all time to Ken Irvine, a winger. Menzies played 349 games, the third-most all-time behind Darren Lockyer (355) and Terry Lamb (350). Played until he was 40 for Catalans Dragons.
See the rest of the list (so far)
» 100-71
To celebrate the launch of the limited edition Isuzu D-MAX X-RUNNER, we’re recounting the NRL’s 100 best players in the history of the game.