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Even Kim Jong-un probably reckons fourth-grade cricketer’s yarn is “a bit much”

Riordan Lee Editor

By Riordan Lee, Riordan Lee is a Roar Editor


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    The cricket world is in shock after Glenworth Valley CC fourth-grade captain Vinnie ‘The Glove’ Glover reportedly bowled the “single greatest spell in the history of the game”, according to himself.

    After his side’s successful 28-run win over the Wendoree Park Rangers, Vinnie, completely unprompted, told all and sundry at O’Shaunessey’s Pub about his heroics:

    “So there I was, the Rangers needed just 28 to win from four overs and I just knew…I was like, ‘Vinnie, this is your time.’

    “Tore in, first ball. I start it basically off the pitch then get it swinging back a mile… Boom! Knocks the middle stump in two. No joke, it’s literally in two pieces.

    “As I’m walking back, umpy pulls me over, says, ‘Mate, that is the greatest ball I’ve ever seen in 50 years of umpiring. Thank you for letting me be a part of this moment.’

    “His exact words, exact words.

    “Now, get this, next ball… Same thing. Batsman looks straight back at me and just applauds, he’s not even mad – he’s just standing there in the middle of the pitch applauding me. I’d never seen anything like it – and neither had he.

    “So I’m on a hat-trick, right?! They’re expecting another yorker… Wrong. I jam it into the pitch, ball flies at his throat but he just gets his glove to it – I dive forward and pluck it out of the air one millimetre from the ground.

    “Luckily I’ve got top-shelf athleticism from when I was in the national diving team in juniors – I would’ve gone pro but wanted to focus on my studies instead.

    “Anyway, I was stoked about the hat-trick but also knew I had a job to do. Four more wickets to go.

    “Next ball? LBW. Plumb.

    “Ball after that? Another caught and bowled. This time, he hits a full-blooded drive straight back at me, I catch it one handed – don’t even celebrate, don’t need to, not my style.

    “Next one, the guy tries to work a quick single to get off strike – smart guy, I’d try to do the same if I was facing me – but not gonna happen on this arm, champ.

    “I pick it up in my follow-through and in one motion turn on a dime and knock down the one stump I had to aim at. Jonty Rhodes eat your bloody heart out!

    “So now they’ve got one batsman left, but get this – he refused to come out. He told the captain he’d seen enough and didn’t want me to humiliate him. Probably for the best, y’know.

    “But yeah, ha! Guess I could say I had an alright day,” Vinnie says, with a slow sip of his beer.

    The Roar asked Vinnie if there was any footage, but he told us they didn’t film any of his games.

    We then asked him to give us any of his teammates’ contact details, but he just looked at us sheepishly, saying, “They um… None of… Um.. None of them have… Phones”, before quickly changing the topic.

    Don’t be like Vinnie! Film your games this season and submit your best and worst moments to Club Roar. You can win $10,000 AND become Internet famous – so get filming and send us your vids.

    The Socceroos' hopes of qualifying from the group stage at the World Cup are hanging by a thread after a 1-1 draw against Denmark. See how the match unfolded with our Australia vs Denmark match report, highlights and result.

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    The Crowd Says (5)

    • September 8th 2017 @ 4:26pm
      Duncan Smith said | September 8th 2017 @ 4:26pm | ! Report

      Reminds me of that time I hit 42 off one over. One of them was a no ball.

    • September 8th 2017 @ 5:15pm
      Arwin said | September 8th 2017 @ 5:15pm | ! Report

      That’s a totally legit story. I was there. I was in fact the last man who did not come out to bat. Now if only I had a phone…

    • Roar Rookie

      September 8th 2017 @ 8:21pm
      cinque said | September 8th 2017 @ 8:21pm | ! Report

      This doesn’t quite make sense.
      I’ve worked out that Wendoree were three down when Vinnie bowled the fateful over.
      Five wickets in five balls is plausible but the sixth makes no sense at all.
      Vinnie states ““Next one, the guy tries to work a quick single to get off strike – smart guy.”
      Hang on. It’s the last ball of the over and he would be off strike anyway. Dumb play!
      Likewise the number 11 had nothing to fear.
      I’m betting the two teams set this up for some coverage in the local rag. Shades of six sixes for Sobers and Shastri.
      Not a good look for the Betfair Cup.

    • September 9th 2017 @ 3:12am
      DavSa said | September 9th 2017 @ 3:12am | ! Report

      Hilarious Riordan , couldn’t quite think of an appropriate response other than a few of my chommies in the pub would have embraced Vinnie and stuck him to another pint.

    • September 9th 2017 @ 2:43pm
      Mad Dog said | September 9th 2017 @ 2:43pm | ! Report

      Gold mate. Vinnie sounds like a bloke i used to work with

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