The Melbourne Cup is one of the most prestigious events on the fashion calendar. Every year, revellers from across the country descend upon Flemington racecourse in valiant attempts to impersonate Gabi Grecko and Geoffrey Edelsten.
There’s only one rule at the Melbourne Cup – if you’d wear it to meet your partner’s parents; you’re doing something wrong.
Join me as we review all the stunning suits and shocking frocks and this year’s Melbourne Cup carnival. The torrential downpour is sure to put a damper on many of the most vibrant outfits, but we’ll see what we can find.
If you’re wondering what qualifications an esports journalist could possibly have to be commenting on Melbourne Cup fashion, you’d be right.
I’ll have you know, however, over the years I’ve received compliments such as, “that shirt with those shorts?”, “can you turn your outfit down please? I can’t hear my friend” and, “sorry sir, that doesn’t comply with our dress code.”
Any jokes (or jabs) here are all in good jest as, after all, I still consult YouTube every time I need to put a tie on.
This is an unconventional one to start with – but just look at the purple on those uniform jackets! Hard to beat if you ask me – 9/10.
Loving the colour scheme here, although if I had an alien artefact on my head I’d protect it with a bit more than an umbrella – 8/10.
All-grey might seem like a drab and dreary choice but if you’d been forced to wear a brown and gold football uniform for eight years, you’d take a long break from colours too – 7/10.
The pained smile of a woman who’s been asked “Do you come with the car?” far too many times. Megan Gale is looking sharp, as always, however – 8/10.
Well, that’s one way to make sure your plants get some of the rain… – 3/10.
“I really feel like this shows off my darker side” – 6/10.
Now this I can get behind – outfits for the whole squad that compliment, but don’t identically match. Nice work – 9/10.
Trump-style hats that say ‘Make Racing Greaterer’. Either a biting political take, or completely tonedeaf. My money’s on the latter.
I wonder what the ‘keep politics out of sport’ crowd will make of this? 0/10.
You have to admire the engineering behind making this work. Nothing further. 5/10.
If this bloke’s horse isn’t called Liquorice Allsorts, I’ll be very cross – 8/10.
I guess this what you call a… comical effort – 2/10 (for the joke – the suits are actually worth a solid 7/10).