Roar Guru
Another week done and dusted. I turned another year older, Essendon and Melbourne still suck, a bunch of teams came good and Fremantle… did a Fremantle thing.
I apologise in advance for the extraordinarily volatile rankings this week: last week was full of just enough weird results, which led to weird rankings which correspondingly leads to movement this week.
I did my best to keep things stable, but it was incredibly tough.
Last week: 2
Yes, putting Brisbane on top seems strange to me, too. Alas, I promise I won’t laugh at anyone who tips this squad to go three straight next weekend. Port at the Gabba- it’s winnable. It surely is.
Last week: 5
Excellent performance, and one that sets them up well. I didn’t pick them as a finalist in 2019, but I’m well on my way to reconsidering that. Impressive stuff.
Last week: 8
Big risers this week, but they deserve it. Emphatically brilliant. 20 goals in poor, wet conditions. Reports of their demise have been greatly exaggerated. As usual.
Last week: 4
Hard to know what to make of Sunday’s loss. It was bad – all losses are. But will it derail their season? I doubt it. I’m still a fan of this squad, and will back ‘em to smash North next weekend.
Last week: 3
Came crashing back down to Earth after last week’s high. West Coast in Perth is always a tough occasion, to be fair, but they’d nonetheless be disappointed with the result.
Last week: 6
Smashing a preliminary finalist away one week, struggling against the wooden spooners at home in another. This is the Port we’ve come to know, but want to ignore. Jack Watt’s injury is horribly unfortunate.
Last week: 9
Yes, it was Essendon that they bet. But, they’ve got two straight wins to start the season. And two could become three, as they face a severely bipolar Freo next week. God. I’m not looking forward to that. Or am I?
Last week: 1
I’m 99.99% sure this club is a psychological experiment looking to see how long one can tolerate mediocracy. A psychological experiment that I give cash too every year. Sigh.
Last week: 7
Well, that was terrible. Losing Rance in week one and Riewoldt in week two: who walked under a ladder at Punt Road over the summer?
Last week: 12
Their win could’ve been a lot bigger – and probably should have been. Nonetheless, couple the win with last week’s narrow loss to the Saints, and it’s a decent enough start to the year. The Bulldogs next weekend will be their biggest challenge yet.
Last week: 13
No, it wasn’t as emphatic as last year’s preliminary final victory. But it’s still a hugely impressive win, and holds them in good stead ahead of the grand final replay. De Goey is a legend in the making.
Last week: 14
Much, much better. And the club capped off a good weekend with a stellar AFLW premiership. Those who doubt women’s footy need only look at the 53,000 South Australians at Adelaide Oval on Sunday, and look at the way both teams reacted to Erin Phillip’s injury.
Last week: 15
Oh, my. They were frighteningly good. Back to back? Back to maybe.
Last week: 10
Sorry, Bluebaggers. I know falling seems harsh, but it’s a tough ladder and they did lose. That’s not to disparage the Blues – it was a genuinely impressive effort, but they were unable to close the gap. I’d argue everyone involved at Carlton will be better for it.
Last week: 11
Among a couple of teams to fall a long way this week. I tipped ‘em. Dunno why, but I do know this team has moved from being considered a great team to an average team.
Last week: 17
So that wasn’t too good. Better than the two teams below them in that they were a in clear position to win the clash (multiple times). But from the moment Brisbane ‘switched on’, they were never going to poach the four points.
Last week: 16
Pathetic. Next Friday’s clash against Essendon is going to be interesting, for all the wrong reasons. All the hallmarks of Carlton on a Friday night; except it’s two bad teams and Carlton isn’t one of ‘em. Hah.
Last week: 18
At the very, very least: they showed a smidgen of heart throughout the clash. But we can’t ignore the fact that they are an objectively bad team at the moment. And they stay firmly last.