Australia and New Zealand faced off in their respective penultimate group games at Lord’s. New Zealand knew that victory would guarantee them a semi-final spot. Australia already had a semi-final spot, but they knew that victory would irritate the Black Caps. So, everything to play for.
Here are the ratings for the World Cup match between Australia and New Zealand.
French
Grade: C
Kane Williamson allowed Trent Boult to share the new ball with Colin de Grandhomme. Of course, as every big man who has completed the first level of Duolingo will tell you, de Grandhomme is French for ‘de grand homme’.
But it was Boult – French for ‘early wicket’ – who was supplying the lessons. In his third over, he had Aaron Finch trapped on the crease for just eight runs.
When Lockie Ferguson snorted his first ball off the face of David Warner’s bat to dismiss the other opener, this triggered two things: 1) the arrival of an ultra-fidgety Steve Smith to the crease and 2) a pre-recorded interview with Ferguson where he discussed how intimidation is a key part of his armoury.
Now, I have no doubt that Ferguson – one of the fastest bowlers in the World Cup – is fearsome to face. But I also found it a smidgen ironic that his soft-spoken talk about intimidation succeeded primarily in making me want to give him a hug because he’s just so darn adorable.
Fidgeting
Grade: B+
Smith, as previously mentioned, was in world class fidget mode. His now-trademark ‘Jedi leave’ had been upgraded to a ‘Jedi “wait there!”’, as every non-opportunity for a single was followed by a frenetic mind trick that convinced batting partner Usman Khawaja to stand his ground.
With all the exaggerated moving about and crazed gesturing Smith indulges in when batting, the shower in which Justin Langer so embarrassingly informed us the former captain always trains must be, frankly, enormous.
Sadly, for fans of physical comedy, Smith was soon caught by what must surely be the fifteenth catch of the tournament. This time it was Martin Guptill, somehow plucking a full-blooded Smith hook shot from his position at leg gully.
(AAP Image/Dan Peled)
Trent Boult’s Hat Trick
Grade: A-
Smith was soon followed by Marcus Stoinis and Glenn Maxwell to leave Australia at 5/92 and Michael Slater in commentary in a state of bewildered, erroneous panic.
“Australia, they haven’t been in this position!” screamed Slats.
This, of course, conveniently ignored the fact that Australia had been in an incredibly similar position the only other time in this tournament where an opener fell before the end of the first Power Play. That had been the match against the West Indies where Australia had fallen to 5/79.
But, as in the West Indies game, Alex Carey came to the crease and began sorting things out. He and Khawaja knew that New Zealand’s highest score in World Cup matches against Australia over the last 20 years had been 214, and that if they could therefore reach 215, Australia would be ensured victory.
The pair got close, putting on a century partnership to reach 199 before Carey was dismissed. Khawaja then took the score to 243, before he became the first wicket in a final over Boult hat trick.
Mitchell Starc and Jason Behrendorff followed Khawaja in successive balls, because that’s how hat tricks work. Oh, sure, Behrendorff briefly held up celebrations by needlessly reviewing his plumb LBW. But that’s only because Australians like ribbing our cousins from across the ditch with such little pranks.
Like Starc bowling Brendan McCullum in the first over of the 2015 final to destroy their World Cup dreams. Or winning the first ever Day/Night Test because third umpire Nigel Llong decided a Hot Spot mark on Nathan Lyon’s bat could have ‘come from anywhere’. Or, y’know, underarm.
Great bunch of lads, the New Zealanders. They love our little japes.
Pakistan and Afghanistan
Grade: B+
Sensibly, the ICC had organised the final overs of the Pakistan-Afghanistan match to take place during the innings break.
This was a storming finish. Pakistan, who had been in grave danger of Pakistaning their way out of the game and possibly tournament with a lacklustre run chase and a series of bizarre run outs, eventually scrambled home in the final over.
Heartbreak for the Afghanistan side, who had come perilously close to winning their first match in the tournament. But, on the plus side, Pakistan’s win meant that England dropped out of the top four.
So, y’know, all in all, a net positive.
(Photo by Alex Davidson/Getty Images)
Momentum
Grade: F
Back at Lord’s, Boult’s hat trick meant that New Zealand went into the run chase with all the momentum. Unfortunately, having all the momentum is no good to you if you’re about to run into a Mitchell Starc-shaped wall. Indeed, it’s just about the worst possible thing you can have. Sir Isaac Newton knew that in 1687. New Zealand should have known it now.
Starc took 5/26 and, as a result, New Zealand never looked like reaching Australia’s total, crashing instead to 157 all out. Hell, so muddled was the run chase that even Smith took a wicket.
There is no doubt now that Starc is Australia’s greatest ever white ball bowler. In two World Cups, he has 46 wickets. Overall, he has seven five-wicket hauls and eighteen four-wicket hauls in 83 ODIs. Astonishing figures.
I don’t know who Australia’s best ODI bowler before Starc was. Maybe Brett Lee. Perhaps Glenn McGrath. But I sure hope it was Shane Warne, because Starc usurping his title would annoy him most of all.
The Aussie needed every centimetre of his height and reach to reel that one in!
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