After a pretty tough first day of the Championships, we return to Randwick for an absolute belter of a card for day this Saturday, featuring a ripping Queen Elizabeth and very open Sydney Cup.
Let’s get one thing straight: if there’s a topic in the world that I’m completely unqualified to discuss, it’s horse racing, and the Melbourne Cup.
But let’s get a second thing straight too: if there’s, like, a second topic, that I am somehow even less qualified to analyse, then without a doubt, it’s fashion.
Case in point, my own Melbourne Cup outfit is the highest form of fashion today – pants with zippers at the knees so you can turn them into shorts if you need to. Elite-tier clothing.
But seriously, I do feel like I deserve recognition for making an effort today, as my six-dollar t-shirt matches the colour of my five-dollar socks.
You get the message I think. Don’t take my fashion ratings too seriously! Or at all seriously. Let’s get started.
The expression on her face says she’s somewhere in between utterly confused and a little bit uncomfortable, and that sums up where I sit with both racing and fashion pretty well to be honest. 7/10.
You can understand why Marc Murphy would be keen to come out today, it’s the nearest he’s ever going to get to a big trophy. 6/10.
A bit like seeing Hot Cross Buns at the supermarket on Boxing Day, going with the gift-wrapped theme here may have missed the mark, timeline-wise. 4/10.
Shaynna Blaze rocking a serious “arriving at my husband’s funeral after I secretly murdered my husband” kind of vibe here, and I’m a big fan. 9/10.
Nick Cummins just absolutely owning the entire day. Is he here to herd cattle? Is he here to watch horses? Fairly safe bet it’s both but also neither. 9/10.
My understanding of it is that whomsoever wears the tallest hat is named the new Pope of Melbourne Cup fashion. And this woman is seriously in the mix. 6/10.
Woah, I stand corrected! Some of these women would make great villains for another Tim Burton-directed Batman movie. 7/10.
As a big fan of trying to wearing my PJs out in public as often as possible, I am one hundred percent behind these lads. And would never sit within a 500m radius of them. 9/10.
Nice of Tom Hawkins to represent Geelong at Flemington after Chris Scott refused to attend due to it not being hosted at Kardinia Park. 6/10.
Wait, how did a screencap from The Hunger Games wind up in here? I’m so, so sorry for the error. 6/10.
I don’t know how this woman acquired my grandmother’s bathroom curtains, but it’s quite inventive to turn them into a dress. 6/10.