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Opinion
With its early interest in canning the entire NRL 2020 season, it is clear Channel Nine has rugby league’s best interests at heart.
So with this in mind, and the broadcaster’s intimate knowledge of the league’s flaws as publicly highlighted by an unidentified spokesperson, why not just hand them the keys for the entire operation?
Let’s be frank, Nine deserves it. It is more critical to rugby league than anything, even rugby league. And after all, the game has only ever existed since 1908 because it was on telly.
With the network undermining the NRL during lockdown via a battery of calculated and sustained attacks, it has reinforced its position alongside the Murdoch press as one of rugby league’s premier media partners.
Considering its naked disdain of rugby league, where better for control of the NRL than Nine, the self-appointed Home of Rugby League?
If coronavirus has taught us anything, it’s this: despite its small role staging competitions, managing clubs and generating a product of exponential popularity growth, the NRL is now redundant in rugby league.
After becoming irreversibly entangled with broadcasters after years of over-reliance on booming rights values – an unsettling financial model unlike its previous of pokies and fines – networks have now emerged as the new Kevin Humphreys.
By cutting out the middle man and giving Channel Nine full control of rugby league, not only would this formalise the current arrangement, it would also allow the NRL to streamline costs by cutting the NRL.
Additionally, giving Nine control would not only finally eventuate in James Bracey coaching the Gold Coast Titans, it would also see a raft of new innovations introduced to benefit the game’s most important cohort- Nine shareholders.
Phil Gould (Photo by Mark Metcalfe/Getty Images)
This would see kickoffs so late they’ll start after COVID-20, breaks in play for the 6 o’clock news, and four quarter football, which will involve four quarters broken in to four quarters to increase advertising volume, giving every match that big ‘Origin’ feel.
Nine will also ensure the poorer rating teams in the competition get a fair go, boosting their viewership with three marquee players each, with one confirmed as Karl Stefanovic.
If this idea were to tank, programmers would still show the Titans, Warriors and Test match football the respect they believe they deserve – on delay, on GEM. But only if space can be cleared among repeats of the Golden Girls.
As for the tired joke about the Broncos playing on Fridays, that will change. They will now play Friday double headers, plus every Sunday night after 60 Minutes and at 5am weekdays to boost flagging ratings of The Today Show.
Nine will also use control of the NRL to reconnect with that oft-mistreated section of fans- old men.
With games no longer interrupted to cross to Moonee Valley because society has unfortunately evolved from the 1970’s, the broadcaster will go one better and get Ray Hadley to call every set of six like a Group One.
You can feel the terrestrial TV ratings skyrocketing at the mere thought.
And if things go belly-up, Channel Nine can simply do what its been preparing to do all year, and that’s abandon rugby league altogether.
Not only would this rightfully allow Bangladesh and Zimbabwe to clash on the main channel in cricket’s World T20 Cup, it would save the game upwards of $120m, because that’s the inconvenient cost of the four highest rating shows of the year, and thawing Ray Warren twice a week from cryogenic freezing.
So in summary, the NRL’s time in rugby league is up. Let’s cut losses, and let Channel Nine run the game – for the good of the game.