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Every man's worst nightmare: Winter Olympics skiier suffers frozen... old fella

Remi Lindholm of Finland competes during the men´s 15km classic cross-country skiing during the Beijing 2022 Winter Olympics. (Photo by Tom Weller/VOIGT/DeFodi Images via Getty Images)
21st February, 2022
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Finnish skiier Remi Lindholm has won the sympathy of men around the planet, after suffering a frozen penis in brutally cold conditions at the Winter Olympics.

Despite fears the freezing conditions in Zhangjiakou, China, the 50km cross-country skiing event went ahead, with Lindholm revealing the consequences after the race.

While the race had been delayed by an hour and shortened by 20 kilometres to attempt to avoid the worst of the weather, it wasn’t enough for the 24-year old to avoid one of the nastiest injuries imaginable.

“You can guess what was frozen when I crossed the finish line,” Lindholm told Finnish news outlet Iltalehti.

“I stuffed a heating pad on it. It helped. It took maybe 15 minutes.

“When the body parts started to warm up after the finish, the pain was unbearable.”

For aerodynamic and speed reasons, skiiers only wear thin body-hugging attire and under layers, which offered precious little protection against the chill.

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Impressively, Lindholm was still able to finish in 28th despite the frozen appendage, ending with a time of 1:15:55.6; Russian Alexander Bolshunov earned the gold medal with a time of 1:11:32.7.

It is reportedly the second time Lindholm has suffered a frozen penis in a race, after an event in Finland last year.

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Not every competitor seemed to have a problem with the conditions: British skiier Andrew Musgrave, who finished 12th, was scathing of the decision to shorten the race, describing the move as a ‘f—ing joke!’

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“FIS have just shortened the Olympic 50km to a 28km because it’s a bit cold and windy. I don’t see that that will make it any warmer or less windy,” Musgrave Tweeted.

“What a f—ing joke!”

While he appears to have avoided frostbite, which may have required amputation; Lindholm believes there will be concerning ramifications from the injury.

When asked by Iltalehti whether he believes he will be able to have children, he replied bluntly: “No, I don’t.”

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