Roar Guru
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A look at the funny side of sport. Mostly
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I write for a living. Have done, in one way or another, for more than 30 years. Yet there are days when I can…
The biggest Olympic stories of the past 24 hours have involved the off-field antics of US swimmer Ryan Lochte and the arrest of a…
After two full blingless days, our sailors have got the Australian medal tally ticking over again, bless their soggy cotton socks. Tom Burton had…
The crowd sentiment was clear. They all wanted Bolt to win. And if he couldn’t, anyone but Cheaty McCheatface. Before the race, Bolt was…
It’s because of Cathy Freeman that I love the men’s 10,000 metres. Not that she competed in it. Wrong gender for a start. And…
The 1,500 metres showdown between Mack Horton and drug cheat Sun Yang is not to be. The self-proclaimed King, Sun Yang bombed out in…
For the first 85 metres of the 100 metres freestyle final, Kyle Chalmers swam in invisibility togs. No one could see him. The commentators…
It may not be as bad as Guanabara Bay but something is clearly not right with the Olympic diving pool. Athletes and spectators looked…
There’s one in every crowd. The killjoy hell-bent on dampening everyone’s enthusiasm. So as Australia celebrated its gold medal win in the women's rugby…
As Ian Thorpe and Grant Hackett will tell you, comebacks are hard. So it's a big deal Michael Phelps is at the Rio Olympics…
One of the best things about the Olympics is the blubbing, especially when the sooky la-la is a villain getting their comeuppance. I'm talking…
The Olympics opening ceremony is an opportunity for the host city to showcase those things that set it apart. So Rio's extravaganza will feature…
Rio's Olympic organisers thought they'd seen the worst that circumstances could throw at them. Then they came face-to-face with Kitty Chiller. Australia's chef de…
The big question for me this week has been: is there a bigger plonker on the planet than Eddie McGuire? Turns out there is.…
We’d barely recovered from the sight of former Aussie prime minister Kevin Rudd eating his ear wax on a lazy day in Parliament. Then…
You're an Olympic champion keen to defend your title. But you're worried the Zika virus might harm your future procreation plans. What do you…
It was a week for throwing away certain victories, Dutch cyclist Steven Kruijswijk most of all. Three minutes in front going into the final…
Donald Trump tried to be nice to someone this week. It went spectacularly wrong. Trying to thank Colin Montgomerie for playing at one of…
When it comes to doping, the Russians make Lance Armstrong look like a weekend pill popper. As the World Anti-Doping Agency decides whether Russia…
Brazil’s economy is tanking more than Bernie Tomic, the country’s infested with Zika-bearing mozzies, the water’s putrid and a stack of Olympics-related construction won’t…
Nice analogy. And I don’t think it’s a nasty article at all. It’s a piece that points more to how we build people up too soon and before they’re ready. Let’s hope Agar gets an opportunity to live up to that promise he showed in that first Test.
Ashton Agar is the Macaulay Culkin of cricket
Lleyton’s the Shane Warne of tennis in terms of his grasp of strategy and court craft. Much better commentator though! Will be sorry to see him go but very glad he’s there to steer the new guys through.
Lleyton Hewitt: An underdog story
It’s great to see Hayne clawing his way back into contention.
49ers excited by Hayne's growth: coach
If I had to choose one to play for my life, it’d be Cahill hands down. He’s the Lleyton Hewitt of Australian football.
Harry versus Timmy: Who is our greatest Socceroo?
In her autobiography, Rousey talks about beating up her ex-boyfriend, MMA fighter Timothy DiGorrio after he apparently took nude pictures of her.
She admits: “I punched him in the face with a straight right, then a left hook. He staggered back and fell against the door.” She also “kneed him in the face and tossed him aside on the kitchen floor” and “dragged him onto the sidewalk and left him writhing there as I sped away.”
Any man who wrote that would be signing away their career. No such repercussions for Rousey.
I regularly call out sports-related domestic violence in the Foul Play section of my blog. I focus on men’s violence to women because that’s where most of the problem lies. But Rousey’s violence on the home front is just as inexcusable as Greg Hardy’s and Ray Rice’s. And that’s where I lose all respect for her.
Ronda Rousey and the dangerous glamourisation of UFC
Loved Lleyton and his Phar Lap heart from the get go. And I think he’s the perfect person to groom the younger guns, not only in the ways of tennis but on how to manage the pressure of public scrutiny.
How Australia warmed to Lleyton Hewitt
You’ll need to explain to me how you reach this conclusion, Balotelli.
Is sport losing its romance?
The thing I like most about this idea is that each year it would determine an overall winner in Test cricket. We have World Cups in the shorter formats of the game every four years but nothing in the Test arena.
Could a Davis Cup-type structure fix Test cricket?
This period is a test for Kyrgios and right now he’s not coping well with the pressure. But I’m hopeful he’ll come through it.
As for the Scud, his performance in the Davis Cup final in Melbourne, when he tore his pec up two sets to love and won in five, screaming in pain with every serve, is about the gutsiest thing I’ve ever seen on a tennis court.
Nick Kyrgios: The corporate athlete
Right on the money, Kaks. Sometimes ridicule cuts through better than anything else. And no one is more deserving than Sepp.
UK comedian Lee Nelson makes it rain for Sepp Blatter
Totally agree, Lee. I’ve paid nowhere near as much attention to the Tour this year because I just don’t know what I’m watching anymore – superhuman feats of endurance or a mobile drug factory.
Zero tolerance? Are you taking the piss?
And let’s not forget David Ferrer, who has mastered the That Was Really Bad Sex Grunt. His grunt always sounds so disappointed and half-hearted but I have to give him points for differentiating himself.
I’d like to see the players extend their capabilities beyond the single grunt and see if we can get a few twisting grunts with pike into the equation. The grunt is crying out for further development but seems to be stuck in a creative cul de sac at the moment.
It's time to praise tennis' grunters
In the past year, Krygios has gone from being a player with no expectations on him to now being a tournament seed. I don’t excuse the ‘dirty scum’ comment or the attempt to suggest he was directing him at himself but I can appreciate he’s going through a big professional transition and may not always handle that pressure in the best way.
Hopefully people like Lleyton Hewitt and Pat Rafter can give him the benefit of their experience and hopefully he can take it on board.
How dare you say that, Nick Kyrgios
I also loved the way she verbally took down Floyd Mayweather, saying she wouldn’t fight him unless they were dating.
The Ronda Rousey Effect has transformed MMA
And Mayweather’s cut could increase the funding dedicated to domestic violence eight-fold.
Great perspective, Riordan. Thanks for putting the outrageous numbers associated with this fight into context.
Five things the Mayweather-Pacquiao fight could have paid for in the Australian Budget
Great article. Even if they were going for PacMan, I don’t know how all those celebrities ringside tonight justify lining the pockets of a serial abuser.
Floyd Mayweather: Great boxer, terrible human
damo, your response is the best I’ve ever received on The Roar. Thank you.
Mayweather vs Pacquiao: Don't indulge the Money monster
Hear, hear. He’s a great talent, with a lot of fire in his belly. So he’s still a little immature. What 19-year-old isn’t?
Let Nick Kyrgios run wild
Excellent piece and couldn’t agree more. It astonishes me how so many cyclists past and present continue to indulge Armstrong.
Armstrong's spectre still looms large over cycling
Glad to help out, Scott. And great to see Putin put in his place…
Friday Funnies: Kyrgios missing from bad boy contest