Raiders fans hold on for A New Hope

Canberra Times sports editor Chris Wilson recently posed one of the great brainteasers of our time: “How do you solve a problem like the Canberra Raiders?”

As far as vexing existential questions go, Wilson’s puzzler is right up there with “What’s the meaning of life?”, “Who let the dogs out?”, and “What exactly is Yoda?”

Times are tough for devotees of the Green Machine. Belts have been tightened. Expectations managed. Spirits dampened. Annual leave bookings to be in Sydney on the first weekend of October cancelled.

Sure, there have been some positives in 2014: a famous Easter miracle against the Melbourne Storm; consistently impressive fantasy football performances from Anthony Milford, Shaun Fensom and Paul Vaughan; a much improved members’ cap; the mere presence of the Knights and Sharks in this year’s competition.

But whatever rocket Ricky Stuart fired up his charges in the off-season has fizzled out. In fact, keen observers would’ve seen it lose its boosters somewhere around the three-minute mark of their 54-18 shellacking at the hands of the Manly Sea Eagles.

The side has drifted aimlessly through space ever since, like an outtake from the Star Wars prequels. Sure, they’re eye-catching in their lime-green strips, but beneath the surface there’s barely enough substance to keep even the most optimistic fan satisfied. And as George Lucas learnt the hard way, dazzling lightsaber duels don’t cancel out Jar Jar Binks.

It doesn’t help that over the past six seasons the Raiders have made stars of, then subsequently had to cut adrift, backline talent such as Todd Carney, Josh Dugan, Blake Ferguson and Sandor Earl, the latter through circumstances that only the NRL and ASADA truly understand.

Meanwhile, talismanic playmaker Terry Campese’s knees are in only marginally better shape than Anakin Skywalker’s were that time Obi-Wan Kenobi cut both his legs off. On his day he can lead the Raiders to victory, but tactical blunders like Hoth are now more common than triumphs like Cloud City.

Young guns Milford, Jarrod Croker and Jack Wighton have the skills to settle the occasional skirmish, but not enough talented troops around them to win the war. Given the Raiders’ struggles to lure any talent, young or old, to the nation’s capital in recent seasons, the fact that they’ve stayed in a city with all the appeal of Mos Eisley is a victory in itself.

But it’s in the No. 7 jersey where the Canberra side is struggling most. (And No. 9, and Nos. 2 and 5, but I realise attention spans are only so long.)

Josh McCrone has toiled honestly in lime green for over 100 NRL games. He was instrumental in the side’s irresistible late run to the finals in 2010, fed plenty of ball to #Dorguson in the latter stages of 2012, but hasn’t shown any signs of taking his game to the same level, let alone a higher one, since.

Last week against the Roosters, McCrone turned in a halfback’s game that would make the great Ben Roberts blush. In the opening stanza of the second half, he seemed to be deliberately pushing the boundaries of just how many fundamental mistakes he could make before he’d be hooked.

Coach Stuart declined to give him an answer, instead subbing promising rookie half Mitch Cornish on for Glenn Buttriss and moving McCrone into dummy half when the Roosters took a 24-0 lead with 20 to go.

Milford and Wighton’s eyes lit up at the sight of Cornish, and the passing interplay between the three bore a striking resemblance to what Raiders fans imagine threatening backlines look like. Two Raiders tries down that edge salvaged a slightly more respectable 26-12 final scoreline.

If I turned in a piece for The Roar with spelling errors, a poorly formed argument and tenuous links to a famous film franchise, I wouldn’t expect to hang around the Expert column for too long. The same philosophy hasn’t caught on in Canberra, with McCrone getting another chance to make the starting No. 7 his own in an unchanged 17 against the Broncos on Monday.

It’s either a piece of tactical genius to get unwanted players into form before he wheels out the overhead projector, or an admission by Stuart that he can’t solve a problem like the Canberra Raiders either. But he needs to find answers fast, because their fans are losing hope.