Jean de Villiers, Richie McCaw and Michael Hooper decide to spend some time away from it international rugby. They book a five-day trip off the west coast of Mexico, at the Rancho Leonero resort.
The plan is to do some fishing, enjoy the golden beaches and relax.
On day two Richie pulls out a black marlin of 617 pounds, and on day three Michael reciprocates with a 324 pound yellow fin tuna.
By the evening of day four Jean is perplexed at his failure to compete and turns to his two rivals for some advice.
Richie decides to let Jean into a secret, “Well I use the SWOT technique for facing a challenge.”
“What on earth is that?” Jean asks.
“It is a method we use on the field of play as well, regardless of the preparation we do pre-match, I assess the strengths and weaknesses of the two teams on the field, I seek for opportunities and threats, and then decide how we will approach the rest of the match.
“Haven’t you noticed how we put teams away in the last quarter of a match? Everyone believes it is fitness, but that is a complete misnomer, it is simply the plan coming together.”
Michael weighs in, “Similar to Richie we use the GROW model during the match, we find SWOT to be so passé.
“Our goal is defined and processes are in place when we run onto the field, however the match brings its own reality to the table, and within that we must find the obstacles within the match, be it the referee, the conditions, the opposition pack outmuscling us or whatever. Once we have identified those we can weigh up the options for going forward and play accordingly.”
“Huh?” says Jean, now even more perplexed.
“The proof is in the eating,” says Michael. “We have been using it at the Waratahs this year, and it works, we scored more points in the last quarter than any other team this season.”
Richie asks, “What method do you guys use Jean?”
“Well we use the KISS method,” Jean replies.
Michael falling of his deck chair laughing “KISS? Don’t you mean BASH method?”
“No, KISS – keep it simple, stupid.”
“Well, how does that work?” Richie asks.
“We do what coach tells us,” Jean replies.
“When?”
“Before the game starts and then at half time.”
“What about during the halves?”
“Well, duh, we can’t talk to him during the halves now, can we?”
“So explain to me how this works.”
“You see, Heyneke Meyer believes in discipline, he showed us how it works with his doberman. When he tells him a command the dog just does it, if he fails he is taken to the pound, and he gets a new one.
“So we do the same. If coach says kick, we kick, if he says attack, we attack, if he says defend, we defend. Simple really, it allows us to focus.”
Richie asks, “What if the kicking isn’t working?”
Jean says, “We wait for coach to tell us what to do at halftime.”
“But Jean, that makes no sense at all, if something isn’t working you need to adapt or lose the match.”
Jean says, “Ja, err, well, your coach isn’t going to send you to the pound if you don’t do what he says, is he?”
Harry Jones
Expert
After this round, maybe... SA 8 NZ 6 OZ 3 ARG 1 Not sure .... Maybe SA 9
Harry Jones
Expert
Damian does not have out and out pace JJ did; but never got the hang of the defencive part
StrYdeRZA
Guest
Hmmm the Championship just comes down to points, best to get them by winning! At the end there's no difference between normal and bonus points they're all just points, win all your games you win the whole thing, start drawing and losing games and you better reach for the calculator! What are the chances of 2 draws this coming weekend? And the Pumas and Boks scoring 4 try bonus points in the process?!? Just imagine the calculations then?!? Forget the calculator, grab a spreadsheet!! :-)
StrYdeRZA
Guest
No, no, no Harry it's your faith in the Boks not to be complacent or overconfident that has me labeling you an optimist. I know they scraped last weekend so there shouldn't be complacency or overconfidence but these are our beloved Boks... old dogs, new tricks? Let's be honest; so far in 2014 the best that can be said of Meyer's Boks is that they did not lose to Wales or Argentina and I know in both those games it took quite a bit not to lose them but I really hope that's not going to be the tune for the rest of the year! May they produce a solid win in Argentina for once and show us a bit more of all the progress we know they should be making!! Google's got no street view of Salta but it does look rather provincial in the photographs and satellite views... sure it's going to be hostile and unforgiving... hair on chest stuff!?! Malherbe and Lood looked decent in a tough game last weekend and really hope that de Allende is a lot quicker than he managed to look, the lad is big and strong but we can't invest in a slowish 13... just look at how England have struggled with big and strong but slow 13s they're effective 80-90% of the time but at the top level where illusive gaps have to be taken advantage of and speedsters reeled in that lack of pace will cost you tries... not in anyway writing de Allende off just saying he looked slow on Saturday and I hope it was the weather and my cockeyed perception... Bring on Salta... these Boks need to prove a point! (and earn a bonus one?)
Harry Jones
Guest
Not really. I'm generally pleased with the overall trend of Meyer's version of the Boks. So maybe that's "optimistic," but the results have been there to see. Good teams win when they don't have their A (or even B) game working. Now, why do I like this situation? Far from home, in a dusty colonial city, with tough guys ready to do us harm? I tend to get more out of these games; you can really see what Malherbe, Lood, de Allende are made of.... Looking forward to Willie & The Boys playing on a hard dry field.
Superba
Guest
Yes they could have drawn . But they didn't . Cos, well , in the end , they couldn't.
StrYdeRZA
Guest
No problem WallaTah... "stay and play" rule is going to have an increasingly limited effect as the NH teams throw more dosh at our players... these guys are professionals how can we prevent them from earning the best living they are able to? Where professional sports have national teams there are conflicting interests and our national unions are going to have get their skates on and become professional about dealing with the issue. NZRU have been the most effective so far with their central contracting system but it's ultimately short sighted and assumes the pulling power of the black jersey will continue to outweigh the NH $£$... Thanks for the sentiments regarding this weekend in Argentina... if the last 2 years are anything to go by we'll need it! And a great big thank you to your team for stopping The Darkness one short of the record... hope we get two cracking games this weekend... rain rain stay away!
StrYdeRZA
Guest
LOL... ever the optimist?
fredstone
Guest
After the Boks' emphatic victory this weekend over the Argies please do one of them what's changed articles with an emphasis on fickle Bok fan responses.
Nobrain
Guest
We should not forget that this is a Championship rather than tests matches. The cold true is that a draw and getting a loosing bonus point when you play away are good results , and a win is a must when you play local. Also, imo, you must get a bonus point on a win at least in one game to become the champ. I think NZ and ARG came out pretty good, SA not that good although they won but did not get bonus against the team that on paper they sould, and AUS came out as looser although they tied because they could not win at home. The way each team got the points is important but more important were the results. I am looking foward to watch two better games this weekend and a win for NZ and ARG will be good for them, and a lost with bonus a good result for AUS and a very bad one for SA.
Yeah maybe. A big loss will be devastating to him, but a small loss will be equally frustrating as these are the issues we have been dealing w tih for a while now, ill discipline, poor decision making, missed tackles etc. The fact is Meyer needs validation, the sooner the better.
StrYdeRZA
Guest
IMHO it will depend on the nature of the loss. HM has to analyse an 80 minute performance.
I don't think the self imposed pressure will be relieved if he does win, however as you suggest he will have validation that his processes are working vs losing will bring with it the self doubt.
StrYdeRZA
Guest
BB I think it will depend in the nature of the losses. Bismark's yellow and consequent red at Eden Park last year robbed all of us of being able to really tell where the Boks stood v the All Blacks and the Ellis Park contest was a bonus point spectacle, still the only thing that really counts for you and me is that the Boks lost both those games, it would be interesting to know how HM sees those games, he won't have liked the result but he may well be happy with the progress and aspects of the Boks game, all I'm getting at is that without being able to have direct access to the man who knows if he will or won't be feeling the pressure? It took him a while to get results at the Bulls and the board were very open about their displeasure at the lack of consistent results in the first 3 to 4 years but he stood his ground and backed his processes despite considerable external pressure, basically he had the attitude of "fire me if you want, but this is what I'm doing..." in the end it paid off... The one thing he has achieved regardless of results is the Boks have been competitive in every game he has coached them, on it's own it's not good enough, but it's been good not to have that odd blow out result which is an indication that the "processes" and "systems" are working.... ... and if we flipped your question around? Imagine the Boks win both their AB contests this year, it would indeed be a validation of his processes, but would we want HM to feel any less pressure?
Harry Jones
Expert
Watch Wynberg High School Just hammered Bishops 34-17
Michael
Guest
KISS? K - Keep I - Introducing S - Stupid S - Strategies
Colin Kennedy
Roar Guru
Love it, this is hilarious BB. Well done :-)
Harry Jones
Guest
At least Bokke won't be overconfident or complacent
WallaTah
Guest
Fair enough Harry re Pots. Yes the rain made both these games quite interesting, I believe it poured down harder in SA than Sydney. Hoping we see more running rugby from all teams this weekend.
WallaTah
Guest
Hi StrYdeRZA, thanks for taking the time to reply. You give an interesting perspective on it. I'm still not sure if Australia should be so strict on this 'stay and play' rule, I do understand why we have to be, but as you guys have been doing this for awhile, just wanted to hear some feedback on it. I do agree with you on the cricketers aspect. Good luck to your team this weekend in Argentina.