Operation Happy-Talk seemed to come to a dead stop during this period. The eggballers continued to hold Zone Red, but they could not break out without being spotted.
And we did not try to break in for the good reason that every happy talker held one of our own people hostage. Bosnich, Zelic, Okon … it was a situation that may go on for a long time.
The chairman wanted a simple act of cooperation – FFA curriculum on a national scale. They hemmed and hawed and sent the matter to committee for investigation. The plain truth was they did not believe us; that was always the regulator’s great advantage – only the burned believed in the fire.
Some clubs were safe from the happy talkers through their own customs. But in franchises where the “optics” taboo meant something, a happy talker could stay hidden until his host began to stink.
The Coninform interwebz propaganda system began to blast us as soon as they had worked out a new line. The whole thing was “just being negative” intended to “destroy football”: the “News Limited conspiracy” was at it again. Or so chief apparatchik Fussball ich bin whatevers informed its followers.
I wondered why the happy talkers had not stuck with other sports: closed shop, egg chasing games with zero international benchmarks seemed perfect for them. On second thought, I wondered if they had. On third thought I wondered what difference it would make…. in this age of optics where 2+2=5.
The people behind the Happy Curtain had their minds enslaved and happy talkers riding them for a decade now. There might not be two kopeks difference between a commissar with a slug and a commissar without a slug.
Everybody is for “happiness”, just as they are against the “negative” contrarian, but the cult’s practices kept getting them into hot water. “Fish where the fish are” became their mantra, notwithstanding the inherent flaws in the economic model.
They had a curious, yet very ‘Strayan solution to their problems – regulate and equalise – a solution which appeared to suit them but which produced explosive results outside the larger catchments.
Alas, the “fish” were not big enough to meet the floor in the salary cap!
And they’d just lost to Qatar. Oh the humanity!
*Allen Black (aka nordster) offers thanks and apologies to his “master”, Robert A. Heinlein, upon whose book “The Puppet Masters” this rambling contribution to the future of ‘Strayan football is based.
nordster
Guest
Is that this monty python thing i keep hearing about? :) The only british comedy i "get" is Ali G....who is back i might add on sbs two, friday nights...perfect for the philosophically conflicted football fan in straya...wot ayyyy-lickkk innit? The "sporty spice/scunthorpe united" of football leagues;) and geez these Coninform moderators are slow, part two still sitting on ice....posted 12.39!
Ben of Phnom Penh
Roar Guru
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WlBiLNN1NhQ :D
nordster
Guest
I think we'd be mucho contento if we could find a cunning linguist to blend all these speaks together. Or find the right slugs so we can just sit back and play fifa while the masters do the work. Part two coming soon below...awaiting Coninform moderation ;)
nordster
Guest
The return of the happy talkers ***** As we return to the land of the happy talkers ...our hero, nordster and his trusty goalkeeper have emerged from the swamps of eggball paradise, the northern central coast of nsw. Many slugs had been removed but there was a long way to go to Belgium. ***** Since our arrival at NT training camp, Maty and I had been living in a cubicle about the size of a bass drum. We were as crowded as a plate of smorgasboard but we did not care. I woke up first the next morning and made my usual quick check of his Twitter feed to be sure that an eggballer had not gotten to him. And yes, another Parra Eels reference. I removed the slug and we had breakfast. He smiled drowsily. They were gathered as usual in Mister Klipp Klopp's office; the head of Happy Talk, one of the high performance mango suckers, and Daisy de Boehner ...all the insiders were there. On the teleconference, Papa Frank's eyebrows shot up when he saw me but he said nothing. In a voice that reached me alone, he said, "nordster you promised me." "Well," I said, "I withdraw it. You had no business extracting a promise from a freak about his hot goalkeeper eye-candy bf. You were talking out of turn. "You're not having him back. I found another eggballer slug on him just this morning." Papa Frank glanced at Maty and so did I. "No, it's my Maty whose being experimented on; from here on I make the rules - or there won't be any more experiments with trying to befriend the eggball media establishment. I'll even withdraw Bosnich if you're not careful!" Klipp Klopp butted in with, "young freak, are you out of your mind?" I considered it and shook my head; Papa Frank's chief deputy was the executive officer type, a "carry outer" not a "think-upper". I placed my hands on the desk and leaned toward him. "Okay so i'm a genius - just the same you are not going to get me to hold the sack. When this is over Maty Ryan and I are going up in the mountains and raise kittens and kids. We don't intend to spend our time bossing reformed eggball agents." He smiled gently as though he could see farther into the future than I could. "That is what the Devil said to the Deity after he displaced him - but he found he could not help himself. Don't take it so hard, nordster. I'll keep the title for the present and give you all the help I can. In the meantime, what are your orders, sir?"
Leonardo
Roar Guru
Its happy talk through the smoke haze, but it has some foundation now. Long may the Puppet Masters flourish. A few short years ago it was bad h00ligan talk, sad talk, mad talk and w0gball speak.
nordster
Guest
hahaha must be some Heinlein heads there at Roar hq .... didn't think that one will make it through! :) have part two: return of the happy talkers rattling around my weird brain, will pump it out once i can find some more inspiring paragraphs in Puppet Masters or maybe Stranger in a Strange Land would be more ideal...hmmm....