Players' limp tactics point to a CA rout in pay dispute

Cricket Australia is not concerned about the threat of a player strike, most probably because the players go on strike all the time.

Whether it be at Trent Bridge, Cape Town, on the entire subcontinent, there have been countless occasions where Australian players have gone on unsolicited strike.

But whatever they were protesting against at the time – conditions, rights, Stuart Broad – the players’ love of a picket has never hindered the game from continuing to nonchalantly reap profits.

That is why this weak threat from the players points to a pay dispute that is set to be horribly one-sided.

Now I’m no expert on industrial relations, but you can’t be paid millions to regularly go MIA and then threaten to go MIA because you demand more millions.

When tussling over coin with your behemoth paymaster, it is a plan of attack akin to bringing a spatula to a knife fight against the wealthy 2015 Biff Tannen with his 1985 physique.

That’s why I’m backing CA to win this one handsomely.

They’ll hit the players with the full force of their frugality – provided the players are available to be hit because they haven’t gone missing at the time, of course.

However, in great news for the solicitors involved, there are still many more billable hours to traverse before a verdict is reached.

So far, both CA and the players association are remaining tight-lipped on the finer details of the cash dispute, however it has been determined that the main sticking point is both want more.

With pink ball Test matches and T20 cricket seeing dump trucks offload mounds of cash at head office hourly, overworked players are desperate to retain the current model which sees them receive a fixed slice of every truck that arrives.

However, the governing body deem the current structure to be outdated.

They are proposing a newer and fairer revenue model which not only squirrels more away for themselves, it also records the revenue in rupees.

In addition, CA is desperate to budget for forecast expenditure on crucial projects like grassroots and junkets, while also ensuring enough remains for the important stakeholders of the future, that being the children of board members and their private school fees.

Based on the obdurate positions of both parties and their tremendous appreciation of gravy, it seems this bitter dispute is set to rage on uninhibited, totally overshadowing the Pakistan Test series.

Or alternatively, not.

Will an outcome ever be reached? Or will CA be forced into a rugby league-style memorandum of understanding?

Or are the players destined to do what they do best and stop playing cricket?

Let’s pray a resolution is reached in time so there is no impact on Australia’s next scheduled strike – February’s tour of India.