It’s common to choose a team to support based on family allegiances, but what happens when you follow a completely different team to someone else in your immediate circle?
I got down on bended knee and proposed to my long-term girlfriend a couple of weeks back – she said yes, thanks for asking – and she’s someone who accompanies me to a fair few football games.
She’s now seen the Socceroos win an Asian Cup on home soil, strut their stuff unsuccessfully against Japan at Saitama Stadium, and she was even there when Milos Ninkovic swept home from the spot to clinch an A-League championship for Sydney FC.
She knows quite a lot about football these days too, despite never having watched a game until she met me.
I put that down to the fact that she’s the smartest person I’ve ever known – and she’s also the most beautiful, if you don’t mind me saying.
There’s just one problem. She’s a Queenslander.
It’s a bit of a running joke in our house but whenever the topic of the Queensland versus New South Wales rivalry comes up, she’s always quick to remind me which side of the border she’s from.
I usually laugh it off, but only until one of my teams loses to one of hers, at which point I tend to disappear in a huff and it becomes abundantly clear that I care more than I would prefer to let on.
And something happened recently that really drew a line in the sand. She became a member of a rival A-League club.
She’s now two-timing me with a season ticket.
I should know. I bought it for her.
It got me wondering: can a relationship survive when you each support different teams?
There were some tell-tale signs that this moment was coming. She and her best friend attended plenty of Brisbane Roar games together last season.
They’re both originally from Cairns, but shortly after the Roar drew with Sydney FC in a fiery encounter at Suncorp Stadium, my partner asked me to procure a maroon jersey for her.
(AAP Image/Dan Peled)
They were pretty much already sold out – let this be a reminder to certain Roar fans that the state-based jersey carries some serious meaning to those born elsewhere in Queensland – and it took the Roar’s unfailingly affable general manager Brendon Boss ringing around on my behalf for me to eventually track one down.
I attend every Brisbane Roar game when the schedule permits, and the more my partner became invested in the team last season, the more I found myself willing them on to win.
That is, of course, until they came up against my team – the one I first joined the very same day the A-League was launched.
I guess I’m a typical supporter who has moved to a new city but still follows a team from my home town.
That is what other fans do, right? Or is the A-League young enough for fans who’ve moved to switch allegiances?
I seriously can’t wait for the new season to kick off, and I’d be lying if I didn’t admit I thoroughly enjoy watching games in Brisbane.
I can’t wait to watch the Roar go around again, even if three times a season they do so against the club I support.
But this time around it will be different, because for the first time my fiancée will be a season ticket holder.
She’s fully invested now, and I can’t imagine her supporting anyone else even if a Cairns-based team enters the A-League somewhere down the line.
We hear much about split loyalties among families in Europe and South America, but usually it’s more common for a pair of siblings to follow different teams.
So what happens when it’s your partner? Can you still live in perfect harmony, or is it a recipe for disaster?
Stuart Thomas
Expert
I've always wanted to run a tipping comp where a group of people pick a team from the top 100 leagues in the world and points are allocated for every win that team gets. It would be fun. Not sure how we would go with the bottom 50 leagues though. Not a lot of people following Latvian, Fijian or Equatorial Guinean football. Hell of a job to do. Might see if the eds are interested.
Stuart Thomas
Expert
Think the Roar towelled 'em up well. Only caught a snippet. Obviously second string team.
Brisvegas
Guest
I not only support a different team to other members of the family (in an Australian context) but I support a different sport to just about everybody I know.
Midfielder
Guest
Its an impressive stadium, but as is the case in the US they or soccer struggles for any proportional media coverage. As you said its a shared facility between the Gridiron team and the Football team.... tis an unbelievable stadium.
Waz
Guest
Well hopefully the management find ways of doing that as well, the dysfunctional management over a decade or more has been the biggest problem. As for a second Brisbane team, I'm not convinced that would galvanise support but a couple of big derbies each year would certainly help - we just need whoever comes in to be strong and stable; Queenslanders won't support a lame duck (in any code - look at Reds and Lions crowds this past season, the equivalent in football is 3-5,000 ....)
Midfielder
Guest
Clever
Caltex TEN & SBS support Australian Football
Guest
I've got more clubs than Tiger Woods.
punter
Guest
They need all the fans they can get.
Buddy
Guest
This is a fun subject Mike tht can have a darker side. Mny years ago, I was nuts about a girl who came from North London, but I broke it off as we supported two different teams and at. Young age I could not see any light! In the UK I sidn't get on with my father at alland he was a Spurs supporter. Needless to say, they have been tip of my hitlist for as long as I can remember. These days our house is Red and Black and there is no dissention! We just wore our shirts to LAGalaxy this weekend, much to the amusement of many, but they do share a major sponsor..
republican
Guest
.....I could easily support another footy club besides St Kilda, given the family history of allegiances on both sides, which are as follows, Carlton, North Melbourne & Essendon I would like to support the Giants given my Canberra heritage but this is a bridge too far. Their plastic DNA and hard sell that they are a Canberra entity, is an insult to the loyal and educated footy community here, while we all know very well, that 'Greater Western Sydney' as opposed to 'Canberra' are a product of the expedience that is synonymous with the commercialisation of sport and our great game. There is absolutely naught that is organic about the Giants, which makes them very tough to love............
republican
Guest
This seems to be far more prevalent today, whereby consumers change allegiance subject to marketing and form sadly. I have friends and rels who have drifted across to the dark side however these have been based on substance rather than on a whim. While having grown up in a strong tribal tradition over generations, they have usually been unduly influenced by another. One example, a cousin mine, has long been a passionate Doggies supporter, because one of our Uncles would take him to the Western oval with the cousins of that family, all of whom assumed allegiance of their fathers footy heritage, Footscray, rather than there mothers, St Kilda. All of this particular cousins siblings, ma and da supported the Saints as we did and my Auntie and cousins in Perth, the exception being my 3rd auntie who married into a very tribal Doggies family. As a result this cousins family now support the Doggies and not St Kilda, while one of his sons has defected to Hawthorn because he briefly played for them. My daughter took to the Swannies despite my St Kilda heritage, simply because they had a strong profile here in Canberra at one time. I started supporting them due to her passion for this footy club, moreso than the Saints for a brief period, due to their affiliation with our footy community. I have many more examples and while I hold to the sentiment that blood is thicker than H20, I also acknowledge that these sorts of allegiances are not so cut and dry............
Yowzers
Roar Rookie
Yep Mike Newie Shall rise again...... one day. Need that off field stuff to come together first though, the Tinkler era did too many people wrong.
pauli
Guest
It is most certainly not an option. I also have several cousins who support Melbourne City. They live in Melbourne but seldom attend games. Typical eh
Tommo
Guest
Wife follows Eagles. Me Crows
Mike Tuckerman
Expert
I actually saw a bit of Atlanta United's first game at Mercedes-Benz-Stadium. They're sharing it with the Atlanta Falcons, but unusually for a co-tenant with an NFL team, United are viewed as equal partners. It seems like another big step for Major League Soccer.
Mike Tuckerman
Expert
My childhood friend Adam Waterson was Western Sydney's strength and conditioning coach when they won the AFC Champions League - a fact my Dad was happy to remind me of pretty much every time we spoke!
Mike Tuckerman
Expert
Cheers for the well wishes, Lionheart. Unfortunately I think we're a long way off admitting more regional teams to the A-League (not that I agree with such a policy).
Mike Tuckerman
Expert
The Jets are a sleeping giant if ever there was one!
Mike Tuckerman
Expert
You're right about having twice as much interest in the league, TK. Not that I need much of an excuse to watch more football!
Mike Tuckerman
Expert
I certainly have a soft spot for the team in orange. I wonder if the addition of a second Brisbane team will galvanise the Roar's support the same way Western Sydney Wanderers did for Sydney FC fans?