It’s about time that Port Adelaide stopped mucking around and started playing mediocre losing football again; this winning malarkey is making my week unbearable.
It’s like a football version of Chinese water torture.
Drip, Port hasn’t played anybody good yet. Drip, the Crows didn’t play very well. Drip, The draw is in Port Adelaide’s favour. Drip, it’s only a honeymoon period.
Then the weekend arrives and Ken Hinckley prepares his team of youngsters and they go out, collectively wipe the water from my forehead and strap me to the bed so the drips can come again.
The temerity of the team from Alberton to play attractive attacking football is unbelievable.
They clearly have no regard for the fact that Port fans had grown accustomed to watching a team that promised so much in 2007 only to capitulate and give up leads in the third quarter and generously allow much needed wins to teams like Richmond, Gold Coast and GWS.
This season the Power are selfishly beating the new boys in the AFL, destroying the morale of Melbourne FC and playing well in the third term of the showdown. This kind of anti-social behaviour is unacceptable.
The Port Adelaide fans are also to blame for this current state of affairs at Alberton.
The club is fast approaching 40,000 members for the first time as the AFL incarnation of Port.
This is causing all sorts of issues, as there is no longer an excuse for low crowd numbers at footy park. Every new membership is a nail in the coffin of an already struggling tarpaulin industry.
Also it makes people that support the Crows very grumpy, this means that all the fun banter has stopped.
Last season was hilarious, week after week of good-natured ribbing from the West Lakes faithful. On the lead up to the showdown the Adelaide Football Club was genuinely funny, posting on twitter that Port fans should be aware that traffic would be heavier as more people would be at the game, using the hashtag #notarps.
Being an avid tweep I decided to get my own back the following week when the Crows fans sensibly headed for cover during the inclement weather.
I suggested that AFC #getsometarps. The disgracefully good form of Port Adelaide let to a rather terse reply from their official account.
Kane Cornes is another footballer that has let standards slip this year. The fact that he celebrates his 250th game, for a team that his father publicly dislikes is quite frankly Oedipal.
It is lack of parental respect that causes most of the problems in society.
Robbie Gray should have stayed injured for longer, and now Paul Stewart has dared to put his hand up and declare himself fit. If they keep this up Port Adelaide will have depth to their squad, which is a chilling thought.
If the mob from Alberton insist on making a mockery of the status quo of football then the unthinkable could happen. I don’t want to live in a world where Port Adelaide start a season 5-0 let alone make finals.
(NB: Clearly my tongue is firmly in my cheek, mark the date. I’m officially tipping Port to make the eight.)
The Curious Case of Benjamin Stratton
Guest
Political journalists seem to get it right when they discount/inflate economic figures because of XYZ. I'm just saying that if anyone (other than the clubs) are going to wax lyrical about membership numbers you should quantify them. As a reader I want to know the real picture. Don't you want to know the real picture?
Brendon
Guest
Lol, it totally does sort of mean that, I'm going to call my mates that this weekend
Chris
Guest
You can't just discount the numbers because you feel that will make them seem more realistic. If every club is reporting these inflated figures, then its basically an industry standard, and it would make perfect sense for a journalist (novice or otherwise) to report these numbers that the consumers of said industry would be used to.
The Curious Case of Benjamin Stratton
Guest
Oedipus? Its where the word motherf******* comes from. Ask Sophocles if you don't believe me!
The Curious Case of Benjamin Stratton
Guest
My point is the glaring anomaly of membership numbers. I understand clubs exaggerating membership numbers because its used as a marketing ploy to drum up new business. Journos (novices or otherwise) however should know better and discount these figures heavily in order to paint a truer picture. They might as well say Port has 100,000 members or create a website where you simply click 'yes' and you're officially a new club member.
Brendon
Guest
Not sure what Oedipal means, but it's a cool word. Nice article Dave, not sure about you writing a Crows article in the last week though ;)
Brendon
Guest
I think this article was written for you dude. Drip, drip, drip
The_Wookie
Roar Guru
Thats not likely either. percentages of match going members as opposed to other kinds of membership have never been the half mark for any club, Richmond is probably the highest, and theyve pushed aggressively in that area. A jump to 40,000 from 33,000 isnt that unlikely given the form they are currently in. edit: In the 2011 AFl Report (the 2012 hasnt been publicly released), the AFLs ticketed members and the reported membership figures differed by 7.5%. Ports differential was 12.4% on 32,000 members. With 40,000 members that would still leave 35,000 actual ticketed memberships. In any case, unless you are with the AFl or Port youd have no way of knowing.
The Curious Case of Benjamin Stratton
Guest
"The club is fast approaching 40,000 members for the first time as the AFL incarnation of Port." There's that 40,000 member statement again. I gather there will be 50,000 at Football Park this weekend? If not its a Clayton's membership number. The true "membership" number is likely around 20,000.
Franko
Guest
West Coast is the biggest test yet, no doubt. I don't think Port played 4 quarters against Gold Coast, GWS or the fruit tingles and didn't need to against Melbourne. If they can win this, 5 wins is nearly halfway there. On a side note, good to see REbert flogging the prison bars this week, hopefully see a few at the games in the coming weeks.
Marga
Guest
Love your work, Dave as well as your passion for Port! It really is quite audacious of them to aspire and as a committed fan, member & game attendee it is wonderful!
Jason from Sydney
Guest
Anything can happen, Port need to just take it week by week and just see what happens at the end of the season. I can only see a huge improvement from last season.
Myles Stedman
Roar Guru
Great read Dave - and I admire your courage for tipping Port to make the eight. I remember the night before Essendon lost to Melbourne last year and proceeded to destroy their own season, I started telling myself and my friends "this is the Bombers' year". Let's hope you don't curse Port with your brave prediction. Best of luck to them.