It goes without saying that Channel Nine’s so-called ‘Footy Show’ has become the most atrocious prime-time TV show next to Big Brother.
I have come up with a panel to replace the current line-up of Fatty, Slats, legend-in-his-own-lunchbox Beau Ryan, The Big Maaaarn and restore the Footy Show to what it used to be – watchable.
Before I begin: I’m only writing this because the Footy Show will air next year – if I had my way it would have been cancelled two or three years ago.
Fatty’s replacement: Ray Hadley
I can hear the mob coming already.
I know he’s not everyone’s cup of tea but Hadley is a passionate and knowledgeable voice of rugby league.
We all know he’s not made for live television commentary with his ‘SmithfromdummyhalftoFinchwhopassesittoCronkwhokicksafieldgoal’ style of calling.
He would chair the panel well and offer the strong opinion that has been blatantly absent from the Footy Show in recent years.
They’ve swept up logie after logie purely through lack of competition but now with three far better options for viewers – NRL 360, Sterlo and Monday night – Channel Nine needs to make changes and it starts with Fatty.
Slats’ replacement:
Anyone with just one brain cell containing a pinch of league knowledge or worthwhile opinion… Oikee maybe?
Beau Ryan’s replacement: Matty Johns
I would petition strongly if Fox Sports ever cancelled Monday Night, but I’d let Matty leave if it was to return to Channel Nine to resurrect the Footy Show and restore it to its former glory.
It’s no surprise that they’ve started to include more ‘vintage’ footage of the show from the golden years in more recent episodes, and Matty Johns is the very first thing that comes to mind when I ask myself what used to make the show great.
He rejected an offer to return because Channel Nine wouldn’t sack the Vautin, so problem solved if Ray Hadley gets the nod.
The Big Maaaarn’s replacement: Nobody
I want to regain the airtime (and huge amount of panel space) he is currently wasting.
The hardest thing to stomach about the current Footy Show is that it is so much worse than what it used to be. It’s never been the most analytical or opinionated show but it used to be great.
Ray Hadley will provide the right dose of solid rugby league chat, Matty Johns is one of the funniest blokes in television and whoever was eventually chosen to replace Slats would simply be better than him.
It’s disheartening to think that (even though I’m not the only one that hates the Footy Show) we’ll more than likely see the same panel next year, avoiding any actual conversation about footy and the same low-brow imitative style of comedy that Beau Ryan spews out.
Perry
Guest
The NRL Footie Show is on right now, my wife and our twin 20 year old daughers are watching it and I'm not - tells you something about the audience they are targetting! Two hours of crap, about five minutes of football discussion.
Nathan
Guest
You really don't have a sense of humour, I can't really watch johns after what he did, Beau has a brain between his ears
Kent
Guest
Go watch something else you bunch of whiners!! Nine's Footy Show is great for a laugh and an insight into some of the personalities in the NRL. There was more than enough diversity in 2013 NRL TV Shows and it looks like that will continue this year. If you're after a program that talks more about the game try Sterlo or The Game Plan. I'm sure you won't be missed if you stop watching the Footy Show, plenty will continue to be entertained by it including me.
Troy
Guest
More and more over the years the footy show has lost its way, time for a complete change, make the show about football. Put the pressure on the show to report real stories, explain Refs calls get the Refs boss to explain and answer questions. Use social media questions about football from the fans, Name and shame offenders, players, staff and fans for poor behavior etc. The show needs to have something to do with grass roots, show some stuff on NSWRL and QRL. So sick of B Ryan, A Johns and B Fitler trying to be funny sooner watch Gould, Bennett etc talk about the game, how to improve etc
Scott
Guest
There's a simple answer champ.......... Change the channel!!!!!!! Long live the fat!!!!!!!!!!!
Dianne Maguire
Guest
I watched the footy show on Thursday for the first time in about three years,Andrew johns walks out,cringe,does he think he is funny with his remark about conspiracy theory,I hope mal never becomes an immortal,he would be lowering himself to be in johns company,maybe in another three years it might improve,I will have a look again then.
R Anderson
Guest
There are over 33000 people have signed petition for the Cowboys to have a rematch or at least have the points taken off Cronulla Sharks. There has been a wrong doing so its only fair to correct it. The Nrl have admitted it but just let a loser team go through.
smithha
Roar Pro
Yea, but he was mostly on his own for that one. The Footy Show was ten times as good when he used to be there.
Johnno
Guest
Matt Johns tried his own show in 2010, it failed.
smithha
Roar Pro
A Matt Johns Footy Show comeback would make my year, so that gets my tick of approval. In fact they all do, except for the call to replace Slater, who I actually don't mind. He is the most articulate of the lot. I just really don't want to see or hear from Gordon Tallis for at least a decade. He is the worst pundit in Australian Sport at the moment.
dwayno75
Guest
Tuned in the other night for the first time in years..... cringe!!
Matt
Guest
Wow if you're watching the footy show for indepth analysis of the game then it's time to give up mate!! You have just named plenty of other shows that do those exact things anyway nrl 360, the game plan, sterlo. How many shows do you need doing the same thing? I don't watch the footy show but obviously people do and they get ratings so why would they change it? Don't be greedy you have plenty of other options!
Linedropout
Roar Pro
What is worth watching when it comes to the big marn? He is utterly hopeless.
KiwiBear
Guest
Forget the Channel 9 footy show. Period. Look at 10's The Game Plan and/orAFLs Footy Classified formats and start from scratch.
jamesb
Guest
It's funny how in the "Footy Show", they have a segment called "five in the bin". Yet, on the field, there is no five in the bin rule. Below average show, actually, let me re-phrase that, one of the worse tv shows going around.
蜘王
Guest
At the moment the Big Marn is the only aspect of the footy show worth watching. Bring back Vossy and his Stuff you may have missed, and punt Beau. At least next year there won't be Benji
Fran_Gipani
Guest
'Slats' no biz being there. And that obese bloke is as funny as a flu shot.
Kev
Guest
Give me the game plan any day. I have been an avid supporter and player for a long time. I have not or very rarely watched the footy show for years due to their actual coverage of football for all 16 teams in the nrl. They have their favourites as special guests and the same ones all the time. They are all bias to the team they use to play for or barrack for. At least the game plan talk footy have opinions and give good coverage for every supporter. The footy show is a joke and does need a over haul. Keep up the good work The Game Plan and keep those mixed opinions and different guests coming.
Linedropout
Roar Pro
Exactly. Why call it the Footy Show when they hardly mention anything about football? The same panel can start their own couch show about nothing in a different timeslot if people actually like them, just don't have the word 'footy' in or anywhere near the name of the show...
Johnno
Guest
footy show has gone to pc, as is tim glbert to pc on the sunday footy show so boring. Matt Johns, MG Geyer, Gus Gould,Vossy, were all out there and not PC, and had a good laugh, and actually new about rugby league.