Just like the post-work lunch hours on a Friday afternoon, so too has the NRL off-season entered into a torturous, unproductive time warp.
While the thick, humid summer air saps all the energy from your body, something very similar occurs to your grey matter as you try to wade your way through the pre-season journalistic junk shop that pollutes the sports media landscape.
“(Player name) is the fittest he’s ever been.”
“(Coach name) brings a lot of (noun) to the club.”
“Professional sportsmen are exercising hard and sweating profusely.”
The stories are as old as the game itself, and almost amusing in a crappy clichéd Grandpa Simpson sort of way when there was something decent to watch on telly in the Ashes.
Now though each article feels as difficult to conquer without vomiting as any seaside sandhill.
To date the most interesting off-season yarn has been about an ex-representative player and barely coherent commentator coming out of retirement to play in a modified game’s tournament, as well as a few new jersey announcements and players behaving like boneheads pieces.
Until yesterday that is.
Fans were given a rare glimmer of interest when Titans centre, occasional wrecking ball and aspiring Double Dare host Jamaal Idris was granted a release by the Gold Coast to return home (not Brisbane funnily enough) on compassionate grounds.
Idris was quickly snapped up by Penrith in a pre-orchestrated move, and in return the Titans received Panthers centre Brad Tighe and probably a few extra leftover sandwiches at the team’s next training session.
Interestingly enough it wasn’t just Panthers boss Phil Gould screaming “Yes yes yes yes yes!” when the news broke, but just about anyone with even a passing interest in footy.
Here after all was a story of actual substance that may have some sort of bearing on NRL season 2014.
And there should be more stories just like it. Many, many more.
If the dearth of any real rugby league events in the hotter months highlights anything to fans, it’s that the ‘off-season’ needs to get benched and be replaced with a ‘swap season’.
You want to sign for a new club for next season? Be my guest… but save it until the post-grand final swap season.
No doubt the Players’ Association will moan that players don’t have enough time to find a new house, school, tattoo parlour etc in such a limited time frame.
To which I argue that NRL players having too much time on their hands is pretty much the worst thing for them, if some of the player indiscretions doing the rounds this week are anything to go by.
Chuck them a $10 thousand dollar moving bonus, they’ll quickly sign on the line.
Plus, as if players managers don’t sort this sort of thing out for them anyway.
In the world of the 24-hour news cycle and social media, the idea of an ‘off-season’ is something that belongs in the era of Scanlens footy cards and the magic sponge.
It should be dumped, just as it already has been essentially dumped by the clubs themselves.
Competitions like the NFL with much shorter playing seasons have managed to create an environment where worthwhile and important stories are produced 365 days a year, many of them surrounding player movements.
Sure, an NRL draft is about as likely as Terry Hill reading the six o’clock news. But why not control what we already have to elongate media exposure for the game and save fans from being dudded when their star player signs for a new club halfway through the season?
And more importantly, give us something decent to read in January!
mushi
Guest
to be fair.. he might be the best parra half back since sterlo
mushi
Guest
It is a light piece on the internet and your arguing necessity?
peeeko
Guest
i really cant see the opposition to mid season signings that league fans have - it happens so many sports and is part of prefessional sports.
peeeko
Guest
the Titans could have kept in if they wanted but were quite happy to let him go
Alicesprings
Guest
I've never understood those mid season signings..makes absolutely no sense!! Also I don't think the idea of a nrl draft is crazy at all. If/when the nrl decides to become truly nationally and Perth and Adelaide get a look in the nrl will have to seriously consider implementing some kind of draft.
Von Neumann
Roar Guru
Rugby league does not solely exist to spice up a person's life should that life enter a drab period for a while. To me this just says that people are hankering for some league action. But they will have the wait. Its good rugby league is there to entertain us and surprise us and dazzle us and all the rest I just dont think we are entitled to abuse it as such and demand it becomes the Dancing Monkey....for to do so would belittle it and disrespect it, and show a lack of appreciation for the time and effort (and lives) that need to go into making a single NRL season awesome. __ I note that Soccer the world over has mid season signings, they have 2 transfer windows and an extended free-transfer window. Such transfer windows are not there for entertainment reasons....they are there for the players....yeh that other side of the equation when it comes to entertainment. Its not a bad thing - its often a "life-saver" for players and the like who don't fit in, bad run, ect.....so in that sense the only thing wrong with mid-season stuff thats even been discussed, and nothing else, which has been the case, is stopping player-managers from getting their grubby mits into players the year-over....newspaper reports, ect I hear from reports that the NRL is looking at transfer windows and the like and these things may or may not be introduced along with a host of other things in the next couple of years regarding the salary cap.
Adam
Guest
Didn't say it wasn't true, just said it wasn't necessary. Comprehension. Old boy.
Don
Roar Rookie
"The best Parra halfback since Sterling" says Paul Carige.
Boz
Guest
And Blair.
Chris Chard
Expert
Well Idris started at the club in 2012, the same year it was revealed the club was in a financial hole and the issues with management. So, ahh, probably a few things got put on the back burner whilst the club stabilized i'm guessing. They did give him some stuff on the website with 'Titans TV' if I remember correctly
Jim
Guest
How about the part where the Titans promised to push his TV career. And then didn't. I wonder if any of that was in the contract. Still, they handled it great, but Titans made promises and didn't deliver. Why should Idris treat them any better?
Sportsfan
Guest
Its ironic how the NRL are always stating "We are the greatest game of all" and yet it treats its fans with utter contempt by allowing the farcical process of mid-season signings.
The High Shot
Roar Pro
Or Chris Sandow
Barney
Guest
Hold the phone!
Josh Wye
Roar Pro
Rugby League off season is snore fest, BORING!
Gavin Miller
Guest
The mid season signings are definitely getting farcical, how often have we seen someone sign mid season then either (a) stop giving the club 100% and their form wanes or (b) coach dumps them from 1st grade. The fans are robbed almost every time. Perhaps signing should be allowed after the regular season though, or even after round 24, which would give fans the opportunity to give loved/hated players the appropriate send-off they deserve?
Don
Roar Rookie
With Russell Crowe.
Don
Roar Rookie
A few weeks into the year you will read; "Curtis Sironen and Lucas Brooks are better than Prince and Marshall in 2005" says Benny Elias.
The Barry
Roar Guru
Yawn...this is a mountain out of a molehill. Everyone involved agreed to the deal and we still get the old "contracts don't mean anything" rubbish. Wake me up for the 9s
The eye
Guest
Tighe played 7 NRL games in '13 plenty of value there,Jamaal didn't have niggles,he had a broken leg