Its 3:30am in rugby league’s dodgy discotheque and after a night of rejection, our two out-of-sorts stragglers catch one another’s eye across the sticky, smoke-filled dance floor.
A coy smile. A cocky eyebrow raise. You don’t have to be Wade Graham to draw a picture of what happens next.
The increasingly weary wingman, who has spent the last hour looking at his watch, swoops in with a round of drinks for our lovebirds and it’s a quick boogie, a slightly uncoordinated snog then out the door and into a taxi for Maccas drive-thru and the hope that they’ll still respect one another tomorrow.
Benji, meet Cronulla. Cronulla, meet Benji.
News yesterday emerged that Benji Marshall’s romance with the Sharks “is not a done deal and nothing is official.” This means it is now officially safe for the rugby league public to believe that the NRL’s long-term poster boy will indeed be turning out in the black, white and blue, as the above statement equates with having the ‘full support of the board.’
It is an interesting situation, and one that has obviously come about through the sheer desperation of both parties.
This isn’t necessarily a bad thing. After all, many wonderful, caring, long-lasting relationships are formed from two people desperately wanting to avoid dying alone in a house full of model aircraft and draft letters to the editor.
If any of the ‘too comfortables’ still resided in Marshall after his lukewarm 2013 NRL season, then they surely would have been knocked out of him after a Super Rugby career that had him being mentioned in articles alongside a bloke who played two first-grade games for the South Queensland Crushers.
Benji won’t be crawling back to rugby league so much as tunnelling under the perimeter fence Great Escape-style, his every mistake to be magnified monstrously for a fraction of the take-home pay.
He is no longer the golden child. Hell, his old club are more upset about social media scout Uncle Hairy not being able to provide more photos of the attractive female Wests fan from their Monday afternoon match than they are Marshall’s defection.
If he’s not coming back to the NRL hungry, then it’s only because he’ still getting a discount at Robbie Farah’s restaurant.
As for the Sharks? Well their 2014 season is still bunny-hopping past Miranda Shopping Centre after Shane Flanagan’s ban stalled them at the lights.
Cronulla were a good side last season but ultimately came up short. To expect them to improve and break through for their maiden premiership win is a huge ask in a year when their real coach can’t watch them, they only bought fringe first-graders and have had injuries to their best players.
To stop them middling along and finishing thirteenth before getting into trouble on Mad Monday, the place needs a fire starter à la Ellery Hanley at Balmain in ’88.
While an autumn-years Benji is a long way off the Pearl in his prime, Marshall’s signing will be the first piece of positive news the club has had all year.
Considering they have mostly the same squad as last season, a garnish of good news might be all the Sharkies need.
And while like any deed done out of desperation things might end awkwardly, at this stage of the game it might be a case of Cronulla having to just close their eyes and hope for the best come morning.
JezRu
Guest
I honestly don't think he has the pace anymore to play fullback, maybe 3 - 5 years ago but not now.
JezRu
Guest
I don't think even Bellamy could structure Benjis game and to be honest I wouldn't want him to. Benji has tried structured play before, mainly when playing 7 for the tiges and it was a failure. Benji is who he is and whatever club takes him on they need to allow him to play his natural game. Allow him some freedom to play what he sees and feels.
JezRu
Guest
I could possibly see it working the other way...Carney at 7 and Benji at 6.
Will
Guest
He will pick up a short term contract to fill the fullback hole at the Cowboys
Muzz
Guest
Scott - How can the Storm have any room left in their cap?
John
Guest
If Benji wants to add to his great career he'll got to Bellamy and the storm. If he's more worried about media opportunities and money he'll stay in Sydney. It's a question of whether he's still serious.
Sports fan
Guest
I don't think the Storm will sign him. He would not buy into the Storm culture. Benji is selfish and will only go where his personality can dominate. I would be worried if I was a Sharks player. The only reason went to the Blues was to stick it up the Tigers.
Pete75
Guest
Penrith?!?!? What then do they do with the two superior halves that they already have?
Le Gaz
Guest
I really think that the Gould factor may see him shift out to Penrith
Don
Roar Rookie
Tony D'arcy would be up there pushing for that number 1 worst rugby recruit spot Jeznez.
Clark
Guest
They said that the Bulldogs were interested. I had a laugh to myself about that. Oh the Bulldogs and their endless salary cap.... In all seriousness though it would be great to see Benji at the Storm (which could be possible), but more likely it will be Cronulla.
Boydy
Guest
If he does become a "Storm Boy" Scott he will be sure to get on well with the refs. I've been calling them "pelicans" for years!
ScottWoodward.me
Roar Guru
Eye I think he will be a Storm boy
PGNEWC
Guest
We all wanted to in the early nineties
jeznez
Roar Guru
Worst scouting of a player I have ever heard of. Good union player - could never in a million years have made it in league. Considering they had the historical experience of Price, the current (at the time) experience of Gourley and Kennedy soon after there were some really obvious signs as to what type of union forwards are successful in crossing over and that is the little men of the pack, open side flankers. The fact that even blind side flankers and and 8's in Elsom and Palu couldn't crack the NRL effectively and made it to the heights they have in Union re-inforces this. Makes Thorn stand out for the athlete he is, that he cut it as a union lock and as a quality league player.
Boydy
Guest
Benji publicly stated he would never play against the Wests Tigers. Simple solution. He goes to the Sharks were he'll feel like he's still at Leichhardt anyway considering how many ex-Tigers there are there and he can sit out the two rounds they play against the Tigers (or is it just the once - I don't know anymore, I can't keep up with how the draw works these days). It's a win-win. He can keep his promise to the West Tigers fans and still play footy with most of his mates. Maybe Cronulla can even change their name to the Tiger Sharks to make him feel even more at home (just a suggestion is all).
Chris
Guest
He will play 7 at the sharks??? Didn't that fail at the tigers???
John
Guest
Garrick Morgan
Chris Chard
Expert
Garrick 'the Toovey tacklebag' Morgan
Renegade
Guest
I want to go play for Canberra...... said no one ever