There is much to gain from staying humble in victory or defeat.
The All Blacks, despite their domination in World Rugby are perfect examples of “keeping your feet on the ground”, when you sit comfortable atop the Everest in your sport.
Even in defeat, the same type of demeanour and candour is evident among the All Blacks. We do know however, deep down the All Black as world leaders in their sport, do not like to lose. They’ll accept it if it happens, but defeat is not an outcome they take lightly, I take it!
But when opposition coaches Steve Hansen and Heyneke Meyer profess to have a buddy relationship off the field of play – as well as do a few players – you have got to ask the question: “what for?”
I am all for back-slapping and handshakes – and maybe a beer together after the game. But private agreements, where the losing coach buys the winning coach a case of beer, and Heyneke entertaining Hansen with barbecues at home before or after matches?
I say: “no thank you” to those kinds of informal arrangements.
These self-same coaches before their World Cup semifinal encounter spoke about ‘going to war’ – the All Blacks even enlisting the help of an old war veteran pre-match as was reported – which in itself is not an outrageous analogy
Because when you have age-old foes together, of the ilk of the All Blacks and the Springboks on the same field, scrapping it out for ascendancy – it is tantamount to war!
If you are all battered and bruised physically and emotionally, would you still feel like having a barbecue with a fierce rival who shot down all your hopes and dreams?
No thank you. Not even a phone call from Hansen to Heyneke saying: ‘sorry mate’ would do. Do the commiserations on the field after the match and leave it there.
If you are saying that by engaging with the opposition off the park that you are building friendships and learning what makes the other team so successful why don’t you hook up a video of previous matches and take it from there?
This is international rugby. Not a kick-around on the C-field in some overgrown park.
In my opinion, this friendly relationship off the pitch, is not beneficial to both teams. This is a softening-up of what this rivalry really stands for. No quarter asked. No quarter given.
No, Steve Hansen and Heyneke Meyer, this buddy system must be brought to an end. We do not want a situation where fans start thinking you are faking it only because you are now friends off the field of play.
There is history between the two teams – a history that cannot be wiped away. It is a fierce history – of rivalry that is one of respect of course, but that does not necessarily demand some sort of compromise.
What is going on here?
Yes, let’s be friends to a degree, but please let’ s not taint the respected rivalry!
CA3ZAR
Roar Pro
You share my thoughts exactly Biltongbek, Friendship born out of mutual respect and ancient rugby traditions
Paulie
Guest
Agree tinman has this author ever played rugby and enjoyed the mateship from either side sounds like he hasn't.
hopalong
Guest
Excellent post. Speaking personally,I do not crave or require love.afffection or that stupid word "bromance" . Only respect. Well done T.Man.At least you understand. And go well both teams in the final..
hopalong
Guest
Good post.That well known libtard journal,"The Guardian" summed it up adequately i.m.o.' as "Dignity in defeat" Parochialism should not detract from that sentiment.
taylorman
Roar Guru
When I say stemmed from professionalism I agree it has always been there in The NZ club scene, but professionalism has added that layer of unity at a different level. I don't think it existed to a great extent between internationals prior to professionalism.
taylorman
Roar Guru
I think this has all stemmed from the introduction of professionalism. These guys do this for a living and in that way Meyer and Hansen are probably the two closest in terms of the role they perform. Both perform a particular role, both are subject to the same critique, job pressures, expectations. No one from either side truly understands the role each plays better than eachother. I think it's that unique commonality that brings them together. Us Fans are a different breed. We are the sports true idealists. We want our team to win, we love the romanticism of the hearty duel and historic rivalry and may not understand this friendship. Saw a movie once about a rabid group of Boston Red Sox supporters, your normally highly energised bunch of fans who have supported the side forever, even through generations. They had their own lives but all got together to watch the games and buy all the gear to attend every match to support their great team. Their hatred of the opposition was also 'part of the deal'. One night they lost and are in town, all drowning their sorrows after a loss and come upon a restaurant where their heroes are all having a nice, friendly, non boozy dinner with the some of the players from the opposition, happily chatting and enjoying each others company straight after a loss. These fans just could not believe it, were outraged and betrayed by their team. How could their heroes be enjoying the company of the opposition. Fact is this is their job, and like any job you have workmates and competition of some sort within the workplace. You also have respect. Respect that you are all in the same business, performing similar roles. As fans we think we somehow think our teams are there for us and us alone, when the reality is these guys are at work. That's why coaches and players have these long lasting friendships. They share a commonality that we as fans just don't understand.
hopalong
Guest
The most obvious test would be for you to go into the dressing room afterwards and repeat ypur bromance statement. A caveat.Beware the entangled bodies.
hopalong
Guest
Do consoling hugs or words constitute "Bromance" in your opiniion.?
hopalong
Guest
And all Gods chillun said ?Amen" Again Very good post.
hopalong
Guest
Always had a beer in respective clubhouses after game.Don.t know what it was like in other countries. Enjoyed both the beer and the tradition.But that was Cape Town. You disagree with this but players from both sides have formed enduring friendships through this action. I think of Schalk and Jerrie Collins,Bissy and Hore,and countless others. The drinking does not make for friendship or respect. It is the most sincere form of camaraderie,and requires an invitation. One does not force ones wors.(Now there is a challenge for you) And it does not make for a less physical confrontation. An annoying little post.
chucked
Guest
Crowd. you are so at off the mark it's not funny. It is after all a game. I started playing at 6 years of age..gave up at 13 at my peak.. It's a game played for fortunes these days and the bounce of a ball can ruin careers but I personally admire the two. It must be an aussie thing..the cricketers refusing to have a beer after the game during the ashes as they want to play hard. I play my friends at golf and Tennis and slag them, abuse them, intimidate them, ridicule them, but shake there hand and have a beer with them later possibly just possibly this is a way forward. I do recall the years gone by when after cricket or Rugby tests the losing team would go tbthe winners for a beer. GO to a rugby club rooms in 300 NZ towns and the same thing occurs every weekend..it's called sportsmanship.
wardad
Guest
I read recently about how Hansen and Henry have made a point of going back 30 odd years to post game traditions ,what the French call the 3 rd half .,Uruguay and Georgia were amazed at the treatment post game from the ABs who invited them to share a beer in their shed. Apparently after losing in ChCh in 2010 the wallabies knocked back an invite only to take it up after Hong Kong so as to have a wee gloat ,which would be pretty shameful but in keeping with the 3 amigos attitude . I think that the ABs have kept one of the great things about rugby .Unless you think ego driven stars who cant wait to get off the pitch and into their private jets and sports-cars, with nary a thought about who or what they were playing like soccer players is a good thing.
Southerner
Roar Rookie
Correct It doesn't take a particularly great deal of maturity to separate the game played and the relationships off the pitch. One mustn't lose sight of the traditions, not just of the SA NZ rivalry, but of the older traditions of the game itself. In fact I would argue that such a mature approach is what makes rugby special and distinguishes it from some other sports that have not retained, or never had, that culture.
mactheblack
Guest
Naw .. I need a Heineken ... at least that's more comforting! You gotta love the rivalry but the bromance, sorry not for me!
tinman
Guest
Sounds like someone's jealous! Need a hug bro?
Harry Jones
Expert
It may sound odd, but SA-NZ games seem to be even more ferocious because of the respect and affection. And it extends to the fanbases, even at Twickenham. I don't see any problem with the Heinekin-Shag bromance.
I disagree, that "awkward " friendship is built on the traditions of that rivalry, respect is something you earn, not demand. Besides I think your interpretation of their friendship and their mutual frindly rivalry are two different things.