Another idea to save Australian rugby union: Bring back the fisticuffs

By Harry Jones / Expert

I was at a top 14 rugby clash recently and saw two big opposing locks square off, off the ball, and have an uninterrupted 30-second boxing fight.

Jeez, it was fun to watch. Nobody seemed to care, but the stadium came alive. Whistling, stomping, jeering, singing, and shouting – we all came to our feet.

It reminded me of how the NHL not only tolerates but reveres fighting during hockey games. Every team has an unofficial ‘enforcer,’ who may have 20 or even 30 fights in a season. The fights are always one-on-one. Both have to drop their gloves, signifying assent to the duel. Big doesn’t fight little, and injured players are not challenged and can decline without loss of face.

The cause of a fight is usually foul play undetected, often against a star player who is not a fighter, but it can just be an attempt to switch momentum.

I am sure that a large percentage of NHL fandom loves these tussles, which become really complex on ice, with jerseys used as weapons and seriously strong haymakers landing on jaws.

I love it, and surely most rugby players and fans of my age remember fondly the lost ability to have a little punching intermission without anyone being sent off or carded.

Australian rugby is seeking a way to distinguish itself from AFL and NRL. While we need to clean up our concussion protocols, let’s add another kind of regulated violence: fistfights! Few lead to a concussion because only a few punches actually land when both parties know what’s happening. It will turn into grizzly bear fighting most of the time, but seriously fun!

Who doesn’t want to see Adam Coleman fight Maro Itoje? Or Tom Robertson and Steven Kitshoff slap each other around for a minute? Or Sean McMahon and Jaco Kriel do rugby MMA? I would love to see Siya Kolisi and Michael Hooper exchange blows for a while.

Don’t worry. The NHL has mastered a code of etiquette, as has the UFC, and rugby players will easily decline to gouge or knee heads or skip the agreement part.

In the middle of a dour test match with too much silly niggle, let’s see Eben Etzebeth give a nod to Rory Arnold and Arnold agree, and just let them duke it out for a while with no teammates joining, no penalties accruing and both teams watching with great interest.

It’s just an idea – an idea to save the ARU. And give us all a giggle.

The Crowd Says:

2017-09-30T07:09:31+00:00

Garth

Guest


There is another story that says a Bok foward clobbered an AB in a maul. As the maul went to ground, Skinner was seen clutching the jersey of a different Bok who claimed it wasn't he that threw the punch. Skinner's response: "You'll do."

2017-09-29T11:24:20+00:00

Pete

Guest


Oh yes Chang Mai Thai girls in your dreams man good for you lucky Swede Looks like you have your Thai fix

2017-09-29T05:38:46+00:00

kkovak

Guest


Little Johnnys mom would have a hissy fit and cry foul , as would the 3 useless female ARU board members

2017-09-27T20:19:19+00:00

NaBUru38

Guest


I thought that rugby was a game of gentlemen, based on respect of the rules and fair play.

2017-09-27T19:04:35+00:00

Taylorman

Guest


Youd be impressed with my partner then, a thin Raro and I gave up fighting her years ago...?

AUTHOR

2017-09-27T11:55:08+00:00

Harry Jones

Expert


Who is the toughest ref?

AUTHOR

2017-09-27T11:54:11+00:00

Harry Jones

Expert


Beautiful A pure memory

AUTHOR

2017-09-27T11:53:37+00:00

Harry Jones

Expert


He is not a man to fight if you have an escape route

AUTHOR

2017-09-27T11:52:07+00:00

Harry Jones

Expert


Biff and rugby are like salt and vinegar

2017-09-27T11:07:11+00:00

DaniE

Roar Guru


There's a compilation of Gorgodze? Awesome

2017-09-27T11:00:58+00:00

DaniE

Roar Guru


Uli Schmidt, the obgyn!

AUTHOR

2017-09-27T10:47:37+00:00

Harry Jones

Expert


The wraparound shot Sounds sketchy

2017-09-27T09:45:31+00:00

The Neutral View From Sweden

Roar Guru


Loving this Dav!

2017-09-27T09:14:50+00:00

DavSA

Guest


Super post NV.

2017-09-27T09:03:24+00:00

Taylorman

Guest


You mean in the Corleone Horse head in the bed kinda way biltong?

2017-09-27T09:02:39+00:00

Dublin Dave

Guest


You know there's already a sport called boxing when two guys of about the same size (thereby meeting the "big doesn't fight small" rule) can get into a ring on their own (thereby avoiding the cheap shot of a team mate king hitting your opponent from the rear while you occupy him from the front) and have at it. Why do you need to confuse it with rugby or any other sport for that matter? Be careful what you wish for, though. If Olympic results are any sort of guide, Australians are not too hot at Boxing. I can't remember the last time an Australian boxer won an Olympic medal. (An Australian male boxer that is. I don't know about women boxers. Call me sexist but I no more want to watch women box than I want to watch men play beach volleyball) Could this be why some want to confuse the noble art of fisticuffs with the ignoble art of the mass brawl in other sports? I think perhaps the best commentary on that was made by Irish Gaelic footballer Kieran McGeeney after a disgraceful "International Rules" test about 10 years ago which was nothing but a stoush from beginning to end, and there was little that was "noble" about the standard of pugilism on display. "If you want to box, say you want to box and we'll box," he said after that game. "If you want to play football, say you want to play football and we'll play football" Couldn't put it better than that.

2017-09-27T08:59:38+00:00

Taylorman

Guest


Yes he wasnt big at all, but he sure was tough where he needed to be. Came through a tough school.

2017-09-27T08:54:50+00:00

Taylorman

Guest


Nah, I would have been the softy trying to sneak a cheeky goal from creeping around the back of the goal while the fighting was on...?

2017-09-27T08:41:15+00:00

DavSA

Guest


Battle of Tucuman ...https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WbJDDSLqfEM

2017-09-27T08:38:45+00:00

Baz

Guest


Genius idea! I was also wondering if there is possibly a role here for ancillary participants. For example, can the lines men get involved in the action or possibly even the referee. I am also having visions of apposing cheer girls exchanging pom poms for fence palings and corner flags. Also bring in some of those Fijian spectators. They know how to party.

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