I’ve been called a lot of things in my time – a sundry, a ham-fisted lover, a glam rock apologist – but, proudly, I’ve never been dubbed a hypocrite. And I’m not keen for it to start.
As such, I have a confession – I don’t like Aussie soccer. Never have. My attitude towards the Socceroos is of laissez-faire tolerance. I often serve it with a haughty dollop of contempt. As such, I just can’t support them and keep a clear conscience.
So, where does a love of rugby and my World Cup FOMO intersect? Finding a new team, that’s where! I need a team that can actually win a game, one that will keep me interested until deep in the tournament. And I thought I’d start with what I know.
Anyone else in the same position? Here are some thoughts…
The Crusaders – Germany. You think people don’t like you because they’re jealous of success. I guess I could agree, but then we’d both be wrong. It runs much deeper than that.
The Waratahs – England. You’ve fluked it once and you’ll keep dining out. You bill yourselves as the perpetual underachievers. However, this says more about your deluded ego than your true potential.
The Sharks – France. They may look like a professional team, and play like a professional team, but don’t let them fool you, they could actually be a professional team. You say you’re rocks or diamonds, but you look like a crepe.
The Hurricanes – Spain. You’ve got all the pieces – pace, skill, and some die-hard support. But, this year, something’s missing. However, I don’t have the time nor the crayons to explain it to you right now.
The Bulls – Uruguay. Once were feared and now derided. You aspire to mediocrity. You’re often your own worst enemy. At least at least you’ll try hard to win, albeit after you’ve had a go at everything else.
The Western Force – Italy. As my high school cricket coach would delight in saying – you’re playing an important position, it’s called left-right-out. Get over it. When life gives you lemons, you should at least say thank you.
Evanfinity
Roar Pro
Honestly mate. Pull your head in. You are way off the mark.
Evanfinity
Roar Pro
I think Reds fans will most likely identify with the Socceroos - a plucky team of relative no-names just having a red-hot go. Everyone loves an underdog. I'd guess they're both seen as a bit of nuisance value by the big teams.
Evan Askew
Guest
From my experience there are usually Four reasons why an Australian wouldn't go for the national team at the world cup. First - They don't like the sport, which is fair enough, so why the hell would they be watching or writing an article about it? Second - they don't like the Australian national team beause they are unlikely to ever win it. Third - they don't like the national Australian football team because of its percieved foreigness. The weird names, the fact that they can play for Australia while playing overseas. Fourth - they have ancestry from another country that overides their alleigance to Australia. I have said my piece on the first reason. I highly doubt it is the fourth reasons and the second and third reasons are pathetic reasons not to follow the national team. Hence why this is nothing more than a pathetic troll article.
Jarijari
Roar Rookie
So who are the Socceroos, Evan? Will they go at it like the Sunwolves? Or maybe the Blues. Don't know why people get upset about someone having a bit of of fun.
The Phantom Commissioner
Roar Rookie
Other Super rugby fans don't have to be as pathetic as you do they?, of course they are welcome to support other nations if it makes them feel better.
Evan askew
Guest
What a pathetic article.
bob
Roar Rookie
You can always tell when a World Cup is approaching when the haters come out of the woodwork to cash in.
Geoff Dustby
Guest
well written article for the 5 remaining Autralian super rugby fans
Taylorman
Guest
And when they win they confirm their status as the best in the spirt.. well cant speak for footballet ir Brazil, think their awards should be at the oscars. Best drama queen the most sought after.
Evanfinity
Roar Pro
Thanks for the feedback. But I can assure you that you're boxing at shaddows there.
Brian
Guest
Well done on getting such a ridiculous article published. Please ROAR have SOME regard for quality control. There's only so much of obscure headlines, political correctness and running agendas a reader can take.
The Neutral View From Sweden
Roar Guru
The All Blacks - Brazil. Okay, they did not invent the game, but they certainly have adopted it and the spiritual home of the game left England a long time ago. Tops all kind of statistics and always comes to tournaments as outright favorites. But the pressure and expectations is a real beast to deal with, and when the wheels come off it sends the nation into a national trauma.
Rex
Guest
Australia 4-0 Czech Republic