How do you pick a winner in this year’s European Cup final? Manchester or Barcelona? The Red Devils or the Catalan connection? Yes, you could spend all your time analysing the strategies likely to be employed by both coaches.
Or take note of the views of endlessly-recycled media pundits on the worldwide web. Or you could just stick a dartboard up, paint one half red and one half blue and have a throw. But that’s just being a tad immature.
There are lots of other microscopic details that abound and could be used for results-based study (i.e. telling everyone who will win the thing).
Here’s just a few, mainly along the lines of ‘The 12th Man’s’ take on cricket’s rain rule.
Wasn’t it something like “divide the number of balls bowled by the number of balls faced, multiplied by the average age of the side batting second, minus the number of spanners in a Sidchrome toolkit?”
Anyway, here we go, Champions League fans…
AGE: United wins (founded 1878 as Newton Heath v 1899 as FC Barcelona).
VENUE: Barca (Nou Camp at 99,354 capacity over Old Trafford’s 75,957).
PLAYERS: Barcelona has 12 out of 21 players in its current squad that are actually Spanish. That’s 57.142 per cent. United manages to have just over a third, 35.135 per cent, who are true Englishmen, despite a larger roster.
DOMESTIC LEAGUE HONOURS: Barcelona (21 La Liga titles to Manchester’s 19 First Division/English Premiership gongs).
DOMESTIC CUP HONOURS: Barcelona (25 Spanish Cup trophies to United’s 11 FA Cups).
LEAGUE CUP HONOURS: Manchester United (4-2).
EUROPEAN CUP HONOURS: Three-all draw (at the time of writing, obviously).
EUROPEAN CUP-WINNERS’ CUP HONOURS: 4-1 Barca.
INTER-CITY FAIRS CUP/UEFA CUP HONOURS: 3-0 to the Catalans, I’m afraid. It’s not looking good for Fergie’s men.
UEFA SUPER CUP HONOURS: 3-1 Barcelona. This is getting a bit ridiculous, isn’t it?
FIFA CLUB WORLD CUP HONOURS: 1-1. Fortunately for Manchester United I’d say.
COACHES: Sir Alex Ferguson has a knighthood. Josep Guardiola doesn’t. Advantage United there.
OWNERSHIP: The Glazer Family (United) versus the fans themselves (Barca). No contest. Barcelona.
So, all up, weighing the available idiot-proof data, the following predictive conclusion can be reached: Barcelona to hold the cup aloft on Sunday morning. Eight goals to three.
With one goal each disallowed for offside. Unless Wayne Rooney has a very, very, very, very, very good day.
Bondy
Guest
Kasey. Danny (dead end) Alves ,will be in attendance for the final and will have a roll around for a while same old, as will Sergio ( the fouler) Busqests his soul aim in life is to jump on people.
Bondy
Guest
Fussball . Very interesting story amazing. I must retreat back to my trench, incoming from fake ex afl fan and i haven't even heard from S.B.F. i could be in for a busy day.
Aliza Shehpatii
Guest
Ok, here we go. Barca spends most of their time passing and running around in circles. Messi has show a tendency to disappear when confronted with bigger and stronger defenders. Possession around the center circle will not win this game for Barca. Barca a very poor defensively. Puyol especially is slow both with his feet and his head. He has no chance against the speed of Manu forwards. Alves is a disgrace that will lose his head and spend all night diving to the ground and whining to the ref. I do not think that Messi or Rooney will be the difference in who wins or loses. Manu has the players in midfield to cope and they pass the ball as well as Barca. The big difference is Manu goes forward with the ball and possess a devastating counter attack. Overall, it is a very even match up of the 2 best teams in Europe. I just hope it is not decided by the referee.
Kasey
Guest
If ManYoo want to win, they need to do two things 1. All players in Red must stay away from Sergio Busquets (aka serge Biscuits) - to go near him is to invite him to fall to the ground clutching his face. 2. Hope Lionel Messi has an off day. Seriously though, I am looking forward to a nice early start, uggs and trackies comfy on the couchio della Kasey with some fresh coffee on a Sunday Morning and hopefully a cracker of a game. be nice if Dani Alvays (on the ground) and his team mates play a good game rather than continuing with the tactics they used against Madrid in the Semi ;) I was really disappointed when I finally got to see Braziol live in Africa last year with their actions against Cote d'Ivoire. I hope my early morning isn't ruined in a similar way
Fussball ist unser leben
Roar Guru
Bondy, yes, nice story about Chicarito - a name (and face) that is familiar to over a billion people ... simply b/c he plays The Beautiful Game. I also like the way so many nicknames of Footballers - particularly Latin American footballers - have such simple and innocent derivations. For instance, several years ago on the UCL preview show (it's one of my favourite Football shows) Kaka explained how he got his strange nickname. Kaka's real name is "Ricardo", but Kaka's younger brother had a speech impediment as a child and b/c he was unable to say "Ricardo" he used to call his older brother caca ... probably one of the first (and most important) words taught to every Portuguese-speaking kid!
Bondy
Guest
The world of spin Football style through a storm of recent controversy. Listen closely. I don't think this bloke will be attending the next press conference. http://theworldgame.sbs.com.au/backofthenet/587/Fergie-bans-reporter-for-Giggs-question/ .
Bondy
Guest
Tristan. Cheers mate i'll try to tune in.
Bondy
Guest
Fussball. I was watching the Champs Lge preview show and found out how ' little pea' got his nickname. When his farther was born they demmed ( im assuming his parents ) his eyes or pupils to be the colour of a green pea . Hence Javier Hernandez has emerged or affectionately know as little pea. I like to learn from different cultures . The world is an amazing and strange place. Im off to watch Stephen Hawking's new theory on wheel chair access at shopping centres it should be riverting.
Tristan Rayner
Editor
We'll be Live Blogging the Champions League final from (shudder) 4.30am! Hope you can all join us and look forward to your thoughts.
Bondy
Guest
Enjoyable read Craig , i mean Ben sorry about that . Ryan Giggs may make an impact of the bench ( i nearly said bed then ). Im sticking to my prediction drawn at full time 1-1 and from their who knows. I dont mean to sound pedantic but Lionel Messi has not scored a goal on English soil ever.
Fussball ist unser leben
Roar Guru
Man United to win 3-2. Half-time ... Man United 0-2 Barca. SAF to provide the famous "hair dryer treatment" at half-time and, as we all know ... Two nil is the most dangerous score in Football! Second half and Giggsy starts United's revival - both on and off the pitch the man is a scoring machine(!) - and Rooney will add another to remind everyone that he, too, is adept at "putting them away". But, to appease the moral police, who are not happy to see Giggsy & Rooney getting the plaudits, the winner comes from the squeaky clean, "little pea" - a man, who gets down on his knees before each game - whilst the whole world is watching - and unashamedly says a prayer to the Almighty. The only question that remains ... will I be able to keep the faith and remain calm at half-time if we are 2-0 down?
Walt
Guest
Manchester United to pinch it 2-1. As stated, the big Roo needs to have a good one. The problem is that big games seem to be like Kryptonite to him and he turns into a pigeon on the sidelines. If he has a day out, the trophy is bound for Old Trafford!
nordster
Guest
haha 8-3 i like the sounds of that :D was a bit nonplussed last year with the Sunday am time final ... but i kinda like the build-up now, and the early midweek games clash with work for me... so no having to DVR and trying to avoid the result for a few hours!