Back in 2005 Australia were smote by and smitten with Freddy Flintoff. Not long after, our love affair with Shane Watson began.
He had so much talent. Sure he was injured more often than an octogenarian (or Shaun Marsh), but he had undeniable stuff, the stuff of champions – and his head looked good on a Weet-Bix box.
For a few good years Watto delivered on all his sponsoring promises too. For a time it was almost ok to buy Brut. Watto won the AB Medal – not once but twice – and he thoroughly deserved it, even if he couldn’t quite ton-up like other batsmen.
But recently Watto has teased to deceive more than usual. Every year there is a bit of banter about his place in the side but this year there hasn’t been so much, so what are Roarers thinking?
I personally feel a Watto article every now and then keeps the man sharp. It’s a part of summer, like sandflies. And presently it seems Watto’s role in the Test and ODI sides, while not guaranteed is… actually it is guaranteed. We’d be surprised if he was dropped from the Test team. More likely he’ll be captain!
We all know what he brings. When bowling he is ‘indispensable’, someone who adds ‘balance to the side’ and who ‘picks up handy wickets’. During the Ashes last summer he broke a few key stands and he did hit a century in a real hurry in Perth (even if his eventual dismissal, run-out off a dropped catch, was one of the funnier incidents I’ve seen).
Now let me focus this piece. Watto, you’re 33 now. We know you wish you could find that form you once had by opening the batting for Australia again, but that doesn’t look like it’s ever going to happen. David Warner and Aaron Finch will take us through to the World Cup in the ODIs and, according to Warney, even Phil Hughes has more chance of opening in Tests than you.
Which brings us to consider your involvement in Australia’s middle order. Actually, let’s look at what you’ve done to our middle order. You’ve singlehandedly made it ok for it to be clogged up with your ilk: the sort-of-an-all-rounder type.
There’s Mitch Marsh and Glenn Maxwell helping you out in the ODIs, and a lot of people seem to think you’ll have one of these blokes alongside you in the Test line-up too.
What a trifecta. All match winners. All big hitters. Not front-line batsmen nor front-line bowlers, but all bowl a bit – a bit good sometimes, a bit sh*t sometimes (let’s be honest). Lately Watto your bowling has been more of the latter, and lately your big shots have been going up in the air.
All the while, Australia’s Test batting line up is not exactly rock steady. We have some bankable blokes in there, but with the skipper out there’s a whiff of vulnerability – smells like Brut in a cramped change room. It smells like Watto.
Your ODI batting average this year is not good. Tell me if I’m wrong but it’s 12.5. Your bowling average is 80 something. Expensive, those two wickets you’ve picked up so far.
I don’t know what Maxwell or Marsh’s averages are. Don’t get me wrong, I’ve got nothing against these sorts of players – it’s nice to have one (1) (uno) (ein) in the team for ‘balance’ and ‘handy wickets’. Indispensable even you might say.
But when there’s a spate of them Watto, I’m beginning to wonder why you are still there and why we can’t just get a proper batsman in there instead. Someone who likes scoring hundreds more than fifties and who doesn’t plant the foot. Someone who focuses on one job.
Call me old school, but what that saying about a jack of all trades being master of none?
Golden
Guest
Ha! Perhaps Ken. I reckon he played pretty bloody well though. I'd pick him if we could get him in our side. I do feel we could probably focus more on picking proper batsmen than bits and pieces players though.
Ken
Guest
Always thought Flintoff's contributions to that series were really over rated? The figures were okay but really wasn't there suspicions about using sweets on the ball (never saw him swing a ball like he did in that series before, or after) and he was absolutely dead plumb to Warne when he was about 2, when he made that century in that series. A lot of hysteria about nothing.
Craig Watson
Guest
Mitch Marsh has the tools to be a better all rounder than Watto ever was. In fact when he has matured, in say three years, he could bee one off our greatest ever all round cricketers. By all round I mean that he is good enough to be chosen for either his bowling or his batting...like Miller, Botham, Kallis. What an asset he will be batting in the top six and bowling first change or perhaps even opening the bowling. His apprenticeship should start in the Indian series.
Tom from Perth
Roar Rookie
Stellar title to this story; well done (Patrick?). I don't agree with the thrust of the article, but no doubt it's a valid commentary on one of the more controversial issues in Australian test cricket in the past few years.
Tom from Perth
Roar Rookie
Barry, you've made a couple of good points. However, your opinion is, unfortunately, an uninformed one. Watto's best position is undeniably at the top of the order. In fact he averages over 40 in tests in the top 3.
Craig Watson
Guest
But it has. He averages in the low forties batting three with lower av. batting lower in the order. Watto should see out his days in test cricket. Has never been a quality short format cricketer...that I can see. He does not rotate the strike often enough because he hits good shots to the field. Is not a good accumulator of runs and gets out to a rash shot far too often. His bowling used to be very handy even vital, but with Mitch Marsh in the side now to bowl, Watto really is not needed. He bowled poorly against the Saffers. In short there are better players just waiting to get the opportunity.
Trev
Roar Rookie
If all we want is an all rounder who picks up a handy wicket or 2 here and there then we already have that in Steve Smith. Watsons batting form hasn't justified selection for a long time.
Neville Neville
Guest
Not sure, I think Richard Chee Quee got a guernsey. Was he on trombone? Gav Robertson on bass? Chapelli tinkling the ivories? Pretty sure Watto would be better suited to solo artistry than band work. No doubt Ed Cowan would agree
Hutchoman
Roar Pro
Not sure why this has been tagged as "humour"? Sounds right on to me!
Jason Hosken
Roar Guru
Neville Neville - wow, where did that come from. Haha, was Watto ever a member of Brett Lee's band? Six and Out?
Neville Neville
Guest
Watson's biggest problem is between his ears -- the injuries and obsessions are sideshows to the big issues. Would love to see him crack it for a good endorsement deal though, say a nike ad campaign or Raleigh bicycles, leave the brut and weetbix days behind. He could then maybe spend the extra cash on guitar lessons and use the balance to pay the entrance fee for the 2016 edition of India's got talent. Introducing Shaun Votsun............
Sideline Comm.
Guest
Haha, yeah, but it's been due for the better part of a decade.
The Barry
Roar Guru
I think Watson's main problem is that as far as I can remember he's never had an extended run at 5 or 6 in the order. There's an obsession with turning him into an opener or a no.3. The other area where his 5 day cricket has been let down is that every time he comes back from injury he's rushed into limited overs games, then straight into a test match without getting any time in the middle in red ball cricket.
MJ
Guest
Don't forget Faulkner as another good ODI all rounder. Watto is best at T20. After another injury he has to prove himself again. Lucky for him the India tour usually is a run fest for our batsman.
Ross Fleming
Roar Rookie
I think Watto is about to prove himself this season with a couple of hundreds, he knows its due now
Rugby Reg
Guest
Great article mate. There is no doubt the talent is there, but temperment? well He looks great for 40 balls, then hits it to a feilder Look what Mr Smith has done, he has focussed on becoming a 'Test' batsmen, and he has acheived it! Its not to late Watto, give up the bowling and focus on each ball faced. Australia needs you as our number three!
Jason Hosken
Roar Guru
I feel your pain too, but I reckon Watto a must for all forms...IF FIT! Can't underestimate his value in the long form. Blokes averaging near 40 for Australia in Tests can't be discarded, especially when they can hold up an end with the pill and pinch a wicket or too. I just wish he'd stop screaming at departing batsman, more chance of an opponent ending his career than the selectors.