A few weeks ago a pleasant stroll through the farmers’ market was interrupted by a Rugby Man.
Really it was my own fault, I made fleeting eye contact with a potbellied man in a rugby jersey – at a farmers’ market.
It was a rookie mistake and my newfound acquaintance wasted no time punishing me for it. He launched into a detailed analysis of all the recent Super Rugby matches and then segued into the “horrifying” effect referees were having on the game.
Rugby Man really didn’t like referees.
As his gesticulations reached a climax I wondered if perhaps he was having a seizure, truth be told part of me hoped he was, at least then I could have departed the bizarre monologue from which there appeared to be no escape.
Eventually Rugby Man ceased quaking long enough to ask me what I thought of all this. Tempted as I was to tell him the truth – which was that I’d not thought about any of his claims until he mentioned them – I also knew I was dealing with a professional. I was dealing with a man who wouldn’t take “who cares” for an answer. He cared, a lot, and deep in his bones he must have thought I did too.
So I mumbled something about being too busy to catch all the games and that being a referee is a thankless job at the best of times. Rugby man could not accept this, it was though I had uploaded a faulty script to the central processing unit of his brain.
“But the refs are killing the game maayte” he said. At this point I longed for a charitable solution, some way I could make a small token donation to a cause I didn’t care for and make a hurried exit. A coin slot atop the head of Rugby Man would have been perfect.
“Um, I guess it doesn’t help that the rules keep changing and the refs have to adapt quickly” I said, now praying for a quick death. “MAAAAYTE, I’m telling ya the refs are killing the game, everything’s a bloody penally these days, it shits me to tears Maaayte!”
How had this happened, and why? Normally I can spot Rugby Men a mile off and I’ve spent a career arming myself with escape tactics, but in retirement I’d gone soft. I was off my game and I’d been caught out by a true believer. I was going to have to take this like a man, which is to say I was going to have to lie through my teeth and give him what he wanted.
“You know I think you’re right, most refs are pretty pedantic”.
Rugby Man looked at me as though our souls had become one, as if the brotherhood of Rugby Men would remain forever unblemished by reason. He slowly extended his arm while retaining eye contact and nearly rattled my bones to dust with a vigorous handshake.
“I always knew you were fair dinkum” he said, before vanishing as quickly as he had appeared.
Mark
Guest
Having said that ref's have 2 eyes, then why do they often only use one of them?
Mark
Guest
Having said that ref's have 2 eyes, then why do they often on use one of them?
Todd Shand
Guest
You are both right.
In Brief
Guest
There's only one way to avoid penalties, and that is to stop competing for the ball. If you compete for the ball, even within the laws, you will be penalised from time to time.
ThugbyFan
Guest
oops, 2nd paragraph 2nd line 3rd sentence should read "when a maul is first formed from a tackle both teams ..... is deemed as offside". My error, too many sips of beer before running off to watch the Tah's putting out the Storm-ers.
ThugbyFan
Guest
I digress with The Battered Slav (Luv the moniker LoL). In rugby, the opposing side is supposed to have a sorta even chance to get the ball. In a scrum, the half feeds in the tunnel and both sides can shove and/or hook for the ball. Yes the odds favour the put-in side but you can get wins against the feed. The other point is the ball is on the ground and no one can touch it with their hand. Even if the ball is between the 2nd row and No 8, a super shove might win you the ball (or a penalty.. same as). Likewise in line-outs and rucks, its a fair contest for the ball. Now look at the rolling maul. Firstly the ball is NOT on the ground and both teams do NOT have an almost equal chance of obtaining the pill. With a normal maul from a tackle, both teams have an even chance of winning the ball as anyone in front of the man with the ball is deemed as offside. In open play just one man between the opponents and ball carrier is obstruction. A rolling maul has 7 blokes between the opposition and the ball carrier. How can you call that a fair chance? Even an almighty shove will only stop the maul from moving forward whereupon the ref stops play for a scrum, al-be-it your put-in. That means your team has to win 2 pieces of play to obtain the ball which is wrong. The other point is in a scrum, if the opposition puts on a massive shove and say the ball is near the No 8's feet, you just cannot splinter 3-5 guys off the scrum and head in another direction with the ball locked in between their feet. Yet a rolling maul they can splinter off, as long as the players are attached (holding each others' jumpers). How can that be called an equal chance? Sadly the NH sides love that sort of play so its here to stay. From what I remember of rules evolution, the rolling mauls developed in the mid-80's (I think) as a protection strategy for the catcher (pod) as he came down in a line-out. If he was still holding the ball, then as soon as his feet hit the ground, the opposition were all over him like a bad rash. Refs began to allow lifters and others in the lineout to stand between the catcher and opposition. From there it progressed to allowing the whole unit to move forward, ergo a rolling maul. We are starting to see similar tactics in taking an up-n-under, one bloke catches and 3 others stand in front of him picking their nose. As long as they don't deliberately move, they are not deemed as obstructing players. I wouldn't be surprised to see rolling maul tactics develop from this also.
RobC
Roar Guru
Brando, we obviously support the same team
RobC
Roar Guru
Kia, I should check Sean's articles, if an Asian Australian Rugby man story appeared, previously. Then see if he will sue Clyde for copyright infringement If wonder if SeanF can get as much as Marvn Gaye family from Pharrell Williams
RobC
Roar Guru
Rugby is good for the soul Lano! Just stay away from refs. And Clyde if youre wearing a Brumbies jersey. specially if you have a beer gut. :lol:
Nick Turnbull
Roar Guru
Dan Petrie is my favourite 'Rugby Man'...
RT
Guest
Lancelot. Very good. A paragon of virtue right up until he rooted his bosses wife. :)
Eddie O
Guest
yeh too right Mick. Bloody do-gooders annoy the hell out of me too.
nickoldschool
Roar Guru
haha thanks harry, appreciate that! (and thanks for the correct spelling!). I didn't know saffas knew the word bogan ;) To tell you the truth, all roarers like Michael can definitely convince me or 'teach me' a few things, but me being a bogan is not one of them. But have no problem with them thinking that, all good. Tahs v Stormers though tonight!
Mick Gold Coast QLD
Roar Guru
To be fair Lancelot has an interesting position on who should enjoy long term jobs in Narrabri and the circumstances, or industries, in which they may be offered; and a curious ignorance of the efficacy of development consents granted by democratically elected governments. I don't know that one would need to set aside a lot of time to hear the substance of it though, no.
taylorman
Roar Guru
yes its like saying firemen are to blame for fires. This is a tough job, and a dangerous one. In the past there have been death threats and wth the players all pushing the envelope trying to squeeze avery yard out of he existing interpretations who'd be a ref. Beginning to think the World cup is going to bring all these frustrations to a head and something is going to boilover. We are not playing this game in a good environment at the moment.
Steve Beach
Guest
ROFLMAO
Andrew
Guest
Jack .. could you be Rugby Man? :)
Lano
Roar Guru
Rob, it's morning and I'm still chuckling!
Brando Connor
Guest
I've noticed an odd thing with referees. They are always too pedantic to the team I'm barracking for and too soft on the opposition. Its just weird... how do they know I'm even watching the game.
RT
Guest
So David Pocock must bore the hell out of you.