As I watched this Boxing Day Ashes Test gallop, thrillingly, towards a deflated conclusion – before lunch had even been called on the third day – my restless mind strayed to the greatest Boxing Day Ashes Test of them all.
It was 1982 and I was just 14 years old.
Days before, I had received a terrific Christmas gift from my parents: Australian Cricket – The Game and the Players by Jack Pollard. My parents knew their son well.
With a cover in the same shade of green as the cap on Allan Border’s head and featuring Russell Drysdale’s iconic painting, ‘The Cricketers’, I knew immediately that this was a gift I would treasure forever.
The book was presented in the form of an encyclopedia, with topics arranged alphabetically, starting with “Abandoned Matches” and ending with “Zimbulis, Anthony”.
So, as the Test match unfolded, the book allowed my youthful imagination to astral travel through the past while I enjoyed the match unfolding in the present.
And what a Test match!
The first three innings occupied exactly one day each. The four team scores fell within a tight range between 284 and 294. The contest was gripping from hopeful start to heart-stopping finish.
And anybody old enough remembers the climax: Border and Jeff Thomson coming together, late on the fourth evening, with 74 runs to win. All seemed lost.
Yet, by stumps, the pair were still alive and they had halved the deficit to 37.
We all know what happened the next morning.
(Credit: Ben Radford/Allsport via Getty Images)
Some 27,000 Victorians turned up at the MCG, even though the Test might end with the first ball hurled in determined hope.
Yet Border and Thomson enthralled the crowd and enraptured the nation, steadily knocking off the runs with scampered singles, tumble-turning doubles and the occasional boundary.
And we all know how the battle ended: Ian Botham to Thomson and the ball sails from Thommo’s bat to Chris Tavare in the slips.
Tavare’s hands moved even slower than his batting and the ball ballooned over his head.
But Geoff Miller snared the falling ball and hurled it upwards towards the heavens.
The English ran from the field in jubilation. AB and Thommo follow in dejection.
And what about that English team!
Bobby Willis, running in to bowl in time with the ‘Bohemian Rhapsody’ guitar solo.
Ian Botham, the bloke we hated so much that we wished he played for us.
David Gower, as pleasant as a cool breeze on a hot summer’s day.
Derek Randall and Chris Tavare, looking like a British comedy duo, with Tavare as the straight man.
Geoff Miller, looking like he had just strolled off the ‘The Goodies’ set.
Allan Lamb, defending his wicket and smashing square cuts like he was fighting at Rorke’s Drift.
Graeme Fowler, looking like he should be avoiding spilt champagne while clearing hurdles at his country estate.
And Derek Pringle, who actually did have a cameo role in Chariots of Fire.
This was an English team of character and fight, two qualities sorely missing in the current English team who are playing as though they simply don’t want to be here.
Peter Hunt
Roar Guru
Sorry that you find the notion of objective observation confusing, Ben. :silly: Do you dislike movies where the protagonist dies too?
Ben Pobjie
Expert
See, again, you seem to be describing games Australia lost as good ones. I’m confused.
Geoff from Bruce Stadium
Roar Rookie
No it doesn't - there is clear separation between the ball brushing the visor and gloves and bat
Once Upon a Time on the Roar
Roar Guru
1.43 it brushes the glove.
Rowdy
Roar Rookie
I might be in my own rental soon. Well over 4 years homeless, I've been arrested for applying for work. Hard to believe I know. My life has been one long private, personal Gallipoli. And they wonder why they can't get male High School teachers .... for they are fools. To suffer a false allegation is to suffer your life being stolen.
Geoff from Bruce Stadium
Roar Rookie
My father went through that process for many years - not pleasant
Peter Hunt
Roar Guru
Ah, true…but what about the Shakespearean tragedy of it all, Rowdy? At Headingley, we lost both at the hands of a opposing warrior and as a consequence of our imperfect hands….
Rowdy
Roar Rookie
Def not Headingly because that was not a great input (inputs?) by our then captain. --------- In other news, he was great wicky.
Rowdy
Roar Rookie
They stuck the catheter thru a section of the prostate. I yelled like a stuck pig.
Peter Hunt
Roar Guru
I stand by my description, Ben. Yes, Australia lost. But it was, objectively, the greatest Ashes contest of all time. Just a terrific game of Test match cricket. Nine or ten wickets and 280 plus runs each day. The outcome in doubt throughout. And one of the great finishes. If you can’t see that, beyond the result, then you’re a nark! How do you feel if I rate Edgbaston 2005 and Headingley 2019 as numbers 2 and 3 on my list of great Ashes Test matches?
Geoff from Bruce Stadium
Roar Rookie
Banished for around 6 years but still managed to play over 60 tests with an average of 46.4. Imagine what he could have done.
Geoff from Bruce Stadium
Roar Rookie
Thanks Rowdy - Michael Aish was a great player - nothing of him but very courageous and skilful - Norwood had some great players around that era. I miss the SANFL pre Crows. Awful to hear about your health condition - I had no idea - hope you are getting the best medical attention
Rowdy
Roar Rookie
I read that. I remember the game. Glenelg were perennial losers but they got up for that one. North's brilliant Barrie was someone else. ------- But the Legs comeback was something else and the only Senior Club to flag in their centenary is so, so very unique. Probably around the world. -------- And on that page they could make no place in the SANFL Team 1961-1990 for Michael Aish is impossibly stupid. Considering he could've played any position!!! Richmond were the unlucky team that missed both Robran and Aish. ------- My cancer has progressed; meh.
Rowdy
Roar Rookie
Martyn was made a scapegoat for that loss.
Geoff from Bruce Stadium
Roar Rookie
Wish I could post a picture on The Roar - I have a freeze frame from the Youtube clip which clearly shows the ball brushing McDermott's helmet grill and clear air between the ball and his bat and gloves
Geoff from Bruce Stadium
Roar Rookie
Trust you to put Norwood in there Rowdy This is taken from Australian Football https://australianfootball.com/articles/view/the+halcyon+days+of+the+sanfl/1216 "Glenelg became North's major challenger in the early 70s, and the cliff-hanger Grand Final of 1973 is regarded by many as the greatest ever SANFL decider. With Neil Kerley at the helm, and supported on the field by the likes of Graham Cornes, Peter Carey, and Peter Marker, Glenelg hung on to win its first premiership since 1934."
Rowdy
Roar Rookie
Had Border had faith in May we would've won that game. His 5/9 was something else. AB for all his manifold brilliance was timid tactically.
Rowdy
Roar Rookie
Er, no, 1978, Norwood over Sturt. Gone for all money at ¾ time the Legs turned it on. Supercharged and Turbocharged. We’d been beaten by Sturt in every head 2 head game except the big one. It was also the first and only occasion a team in any Australian Senior sport had won the flag in their 100th year.
Geoff from Bruce Stadium
Roar Rookie
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3HezgwT8fBU
Geoff from Bruce Stadium
Roar Rookie
Not sure if my last comment got through Check it out on youtube – I can’t attach the link for some reason The ball grazes McDermott’s visor – his bat and gloves are nowhere near the ball