To be sung to the tune of OMC’s ‘How Bizarre’:
Brother Kieran’s in the back, gaffer Hansen’s in the front
Cruisin’ down the lobby to meeting room AB One
Something feels strange under a player’s behind
He feels around the chair to see what he can find
A bump in the cushion which they cut with disbelieving eyes
What’s that a bug? There’s been a spy!
How bizarre
How bizarre, how bizarre
They sit on it for days staying quiet en masse
As Bledisloe two approaches a little too fast
On the eve of the match there’s whispers to a journo flunkey
Spygate explodes the next day to send fans a-chatter like monkeys
How bizarre
How bizarre, how bizarre
Ooh, baby (Ooh, baby)
It’s making Cheika crazy (It’s making him crazy)
Everytime he looks around
Everytime he looks around (Everytime he looks around)
Everytime he looks around
It’s in his face
The Wallaby coach roars up after his team gets clobbered down
Ranting at the injustice of the untimely leak all over town
TV news and camera, there’s choppers after the spy
Marines, police, reporters ask where, for and why
Cheika yells, “Nuthin’ to do with us” Hansen asked why he sat on
And didn’t come out early or wait till the game had been and gone
Then the news 6 months later that had spygate back in lights
The spy was the AB’s bodyguard and he’s just been read his rights
How bizarre
How bizarre, how bizarre
Ooh, baby (Ooh, baby)
It’s making Hansen crazy (It’s making him crazy)
Everytime he looks around
Everytime he looks around (Everytime he looks around)
Everytime he looks around
It’s in his face
Jibba Jabba
Roar Guru
Not so much sarcastic as tongue in cheek as suggested by wikipedia - I actually preferred the alternative facts version - 'Someone stole my car' - sung by the same lads to the same tune and a bit harsh to label Otara a slum or a ghetto - it is more a tough working class area and a hardcore place to live and work.
cuw
Guest
" Otara Millionaires Club " it is actually a sarcastic term - as Otara is an area in Auckland known as a slum / ghetto ..... https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/OMC_(band)
Vic rugby
Guest
Article really glazes over the fact that this scandal was why the qantas wallabies lost 7 straight. Clearly the timing of this is the reason the qantas boys won 40% of their games. Without this scandal the team would not have sunk to the record lows and general disgust of the sporting fraternity at just how pathetic they were last year. Im not going to recite the win loss ratio as every fan knows them already. I dont know maybe import some old broken down has beens who have been losing to nz for over a decade that might help. I mean really whats the alternative? Developing talent? No lets give more money to the likes of quade cooper in the hope that he will finally come good. That has worked so well for the last decade
ClarkeG
Guest
Ohh dear... https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QrrIRr9arkM
Jibba Jabba
Roar Guru
There are many reasons why a team should hold it back - being a physics teacher as you allege indicates you have a modicum of intelligence, your comment belies that :)
Matt Porter
Guest
Thanks Geoff Haven't been able to get the friggin thing out of my head for 2 days now.
ThugbyFan
Roar Guru
Oh Jibba Jabba, that's the best one I have ever read here, I can see the front page of NZ Herald tomorrow; "Inspector Detective Shagger Hanson cleans magnifying glasses to find perpetrator of heinous crime, does not trust local plods". But I must agree with you on the next point as I was thinking the same thing. The charge "public nuisance" sorta implies "obstruction of police investigation" or "taking up police time on stupid prank" rather than "he dun it, your 'onour". Now how he is obstructing the investigation is purely hypothetical, I could hypothesise that he won't tell the plods "who dun it" and if the hotel or NZRU don't press charges then the cops can only charge him with causing a public nuisance. :)
ThugbyFan
Roar Guru
RedsFan and Mitch, I think you have the story a little mixed up. It was leaked to the NZ Herald on the FRIDAY, which gave them plenty of time to check the authenticity of the story, write their version of it and publish it on the Saturday FRONT page. Additionally the boss of NZRU did not inform his ARU counterpart of the bug discovery until just before the story was published in the NZ papers, which I read as utter total disrespect unless (in hindsight) he thought the ARU had something to do with the bugging. Somewhere around that time, they finally stopped hiding the story and informed the NSW police, obviously they would look pretty bad if the cops had to be informed via some NZ rag. Their lame excuse afterwards was the "hotel security people" asked them to keep it quiet. What a load of tripe! The AB management saw a chance to exploit the situation and went for it. With the NZ newspaper story, although there were no direct accusations, the line behind the story was "Cheating desperate WB caught spying on the Archangels called AB". I also remember earlier in the week (about Wednesday) it was reported in many newspapers that S.Hanson was whingeing that spies were watching his team training. Mind you, Shagga is always complaining on that one. A poor man's imitation of Eddie Jones, methinks. LoL So now we ask; why the hell did the AB/NZRU hold the story till the day of the match? Please don't tell me the NZRU boss was on Mars or Tahiti or somewhere. I teach physics and I am sure there are inventions called phones and skype out there somewhere. To be sure, it "geed up" the AB players, who sang anthems before their haka and belted the hapless WB. "Game, set and match, we won!" Incidentally Matt, it was the FIRST Bledisloe match for 2016, you need to change your line "As Bledisloe two approaches a little too fast".
mapu
Guest
Too long...but not long now.
Jibba Jabba
Roar Guru
First penned by a young man from the one man band - OMC - who knows what that means ....no-one? = the Otara Millionaires Club, And i think that bloke was the only member of that club as well - excluding the local BP 'pres' of course...
Jibba Jabba
Roar Guru
No he shouldn't have - like any self respecting person in this country he no doubt did not trust the local police investigating a bug possibly planted by the local team admin and it transpires possibly by a local security firm. And being an ex kiwi cop possibly thought it would be good to catch the offender/s himself. Interesting that he possibly used the local security firm to catch the perpetrator and now they are top of the suspect list. I note details coming out saying the individual denies the allegation (which is all it is at the moment) and also the actual charge - of causing a public nuisance - which is an interesting charge cos one of the ingredients is that it must have occurred in a public place - a hotel room is not a public place. That suggests it has nothing to do with planting a bug. Police are saying it is to do with obstructing THEIR inquiry somehow - hypothesizing here but perhaps... that is to do with setting up surveillance on the room trying to catch the offender.... even then it is still not in a public place. Cant wait for the real facts to come out..
Jibba Jabba
Roar Guru
or "Somewhere deep inside somethings got a ...."
ClarkeG
Guest
You're being called out on another page by the way just in case you didn't know. [ Loyal said | February 10th 2017 @ 2:48am | ! Report Your silence is deafening RedFan1. Come out of your place of hiding and speak ]
Geoff Parkes
Expert
Hey Matt. Great song, made even better with these lyrics!
taylorman
Roar Guru
We did have. Some have just decided to restate what we all knew just because something else happened.
Ken Catchpole's Other Leg
Guest
Wish we could've had 'bug gate' earlier than now. It's been a long dull off season.
Machooka
Roar Guru
Bizarrrre observation from the west... and like WTF?!?
ClarkeG
Guest
yeah I know but i just couldn't resist :-)
Matt Porter
Roar Guru
I like your ANZAC spirit Boz
piru
Guest
The adults, in conjunction with the saucer people and the reverse vampires......