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To be sung to the tune of OMC’s ‘How Bizarre’:
Brother Kieran’s in the back, gaffer Hansen’s in the front
Cruisin’ down the lobby to meeting room AB One
Something feels strange under a player’s behind
He feels around the chair to see what he can find
A bump in the cushion which they cut with disbelieving eyes
What’s that a bug? There’s been a spy!
How bizarre
How bizarre, how bizarre
They sit on it for days staying quiet en masse
As Bledisloe two approaches a little too fast
On the eve of the match there’s whispers to a journo flunkey
Spygate explodes the next day to send fans a-chatter like monkeys
How bizarre
How bizarre, how bizarre
Ooh, baby (Ooh, baby)
It’s making Cheika crazy (It’s making him crazy)
Everytime he looks around
Everytime he looks around (Everytime he looks around)
Everytime he looks around
It’s in his face
The Wallaby coach roars up after his team gets clobbered down
Ranting at the injustice of the untimely leak all over town
TV news and camera, there’s choppers after the spy
Marines, police, reporters ask where, for and why
Cheika yells, “Nuthin’ to do with us” Hansen asked why he sat on
And didn’t come out early or wait till the game had been and gone
Then the news 6 months later that had spygate back in lights
The spy was the AB’s bodyguard and he’s just been read his rights
How bizarre
How bizarre, how bizarre
Ooh, baby (Ooh, baby)
It’s making Hansen crazy (It’s making him crazy)
Everytime he looks around
Everytime he looks around (Everytime he looks around)
Everytime he looks around
It’s in his face
Join The Roar rugby editor Christy Doran, former Wallaby Matt Toomua and a cast of regular and special guests as they look at the biggest issues in the game on The Roar Rugby Podcast. If you’re looking for great odds on the next game check out Aussie bookmaker PlayUp. Chances are you’re about to lose. Set a deposit limit.