In a fairly slow week in the world of Cricket, England bowled out for 58 (after being 9/27) and lost by an innings to New Zealand. In addition, he Queensland Bulls also secured another Sheffield Shield title at Alan Border Oval – how brilliant!
The third Test in Cape Town also wrapped up with an Australian loss at the hands of South Africa.
The suspended then not-suspended Kagiso Rabada combined with ‘Aussie’ Morne Morkel helped South Africa leap (like Thompson’s Gazelles) to 2-1 series lead that has really taken a turn since Australia so comfortably won the first Test in Durban a few weeks ago.
A fairly uneventful Test Match in Cape Town saw South Africa defeat Australia by 300+ runs, which conveniently shifted the Cricket world’s focus away from England’s pathetic 1st innings showing to New Zealand late last week.
An issue was raised about some of the Australian players colluding in an attempt to alter the condition of the ball on Day 3.
You may have heard about this – it’s on Twitter.
Cameron Bancroft was caught out, seemingly by the only TV camera at the ground not trawling the 75-100 spectators for attractive women, when he was seen to be stowing something other than short-leg’s box down the front of his trousers.
That’s right – we can’t find MH370, or Harold Holt, or Taylor Walker in last year’s AFL Grand Final, but we can sure find a bloke just plying his trade for his country trying to hide a thumbnail size piece of something down his strides. Come on guys, seriously?
Then there was that presser after the day’s play, where Steve Smith admitted there was a leadership team chat where a plot was hatched.
(Photo by Cameron Spencer/Getty Images)
Yep, okay – Steve Smith, David Warner, Bancroft et al. should be sanctioned by the ICC under Law 23.5 subsection (iii) Players being dumb cheats. Beyond this though, can everyone just chill out?
Seriously, flip your binoculars around the other way, this is not such a big deal. Michael Atherton’s done it. Shahid Afridi’s done it. Rahul Dravid’s done it. Sachin Tendulkar’s done it. Faf ‘Shirt Off’ Du Plessis has done it, not once, but twice.
Please review the sanctions meted out to these blokes and read-up on the code of conduct in cricket before you come anywhere near me with a diatribe exalting the virtues of anything other than a fine and short suspension.
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Please, do that. This isn’t a big deal. Come back to me with a better idea of scourges on the game like spot-fixing, match-fixing, and Michael Clarke’s commentary – ball tampering is quite rightly, low-end.
This brings me to my point about what can be done in the future to mitigate against this ‘burn the boats’ scourge on the game.
The ICC has been asleep at the wheel on this for years now. Forget bat widths, boundary sizes, and DRS umpire’s call.
What about the key issue of why cricket whites even have pockets? Tell me – anyone? The ICC has been negligent in this area in not mandating a pocket ban for fielders. Quite literally, the solution is a stitch-up.
If players want gum on the field, the undergraduate intern could bring it out like spare pairs of gloves at drinks breaks. Or better still, the umpires can become licensed gum-dealers. I’m all for gum-control.
You know it makes sense. Seriously, there’s nothing to see here. Everyone needs to take a Bex, lie down and just focus on the Queensland Bulls, or how horrible England is at Test cricket presently.
As Greg Rowell said in a litany of excellent points made on ABC Radio, “It’s all about the optics; they are in the optics business.”
It’s a bad look, but move on people – seriously. This problem is symptomatic of a much grander festering problem. So, can we focus on something else?
Rant complete.
El Loco
Roar Rookie
Ok here goes. Don't label every opinion that is different from yours as hysterical. There has been a vast volume of legitimate emotional response from fans that feel the game they love has been steadily hijacked. Something's been simmering for a while and now it's boiled over. This might be the straw that broke the camel's back, but it doesn't diminish its seriousness, and the ones in charge are still culpable for the mess. Re point 1: This is a sports opinion website, it's a tired juvenile argument to say there are more important things in the world. Go and comment on a news forum then, or better still, do something real about it. And "world poverty"? Thanks Miss Universe. Re point 2: Another tired argument, couldn't care less what a foreign player did, especially Goin as far back as 1994. This is my team, today, and it's time someone cared about the issue. And stop bringing up du Plessis, who argued the charge, not the facts. Re point 3: I hate sledging and have expressed so numerous times on this website. Not walking has its issues but is not against the laws of the game. Batsmen are entitled to wait for the umpire's decision. Re Facebook etc, maybe, I don't know. I highly doubt they're too fussed about suppression on this topic. It doesn't change the fact that voiced opinions can and are being heard. Re stakeholders (a legitimate description btw, not 'as I call them'), again you only say "pander" because their response doesn't equate with your opinion. On balance it seems in keeping with the public and corporate sentiment.
Rob
Guest
Really funny article. The problem is that once politicians jump on the bandwagon to grab some cheap headlines no chance of rational thought. Plus to be honest Australia's cricket team have been getting up people noses of late and people around the world were more than happy to jump of the said bandwagon and stick the boot in.
Duncan Smith
Roar Guru
Wow El Loco, you've demolished all the arguments I made. Stunning!
antz666
Guest
The sanctions are probaly too harsh in comparison. I think the onus is on the ICC to make ball-tampering a harsher penalty since it is delibrate cheating whether it works or not. I think the aussie team is copping it worse coz of a belief that the australian team gets to set the moral line despite other's thinking the push it harder than most. whether right or not. ICC should crack down on this because for me it's only a level down from match fixing.
El Loco
Roar Rookie
Jeez, no need to get hysterical.
George
Guest
'Lehmann is in this up to his eyeballs and thinks wearing glasses publicly for the first time in his life will give him some nobility and credibility' So cringeworthy. And crocodile tears more or less. As if he admires the NZ culture.
Neil Back
Roar Rookie
I'll bet shiny things and stuff that spins does too
Nick
Roar Guru
No. Read again. DuPlessis acknowledged that he had a mint, and used it to shine the ball. That's fact. His argument lay with his belief it to be legal. It was only an appeal where that was proven to be incorrect. Stop dragging Tendulkar into this. He was cleared. It's slander otherwise. Fact will ALWAYS trump your opinion. There is officially no record of Tendulkar tampering the ball. He wasn't even charged with tampering. He was charged with not informing the umpire he was cleaning the ball. Quite a distinct difference and easy to note for those who are prepared to read and research before trumping lies, Pedro. Editors, please remove the Tendulkar references by the poorly informed.
mickey of mo$man
Guest
Na i like the England comments!!! always brings a smile to my face
mickey of mo$man
Guest
when Karl stefanovic and Malcolm Turnball are making public announcements than it can quite safely be considered 'Hysteria'
Pedro The Fisherman
Roar Rookie
If I was Smith, Warner or Bancroft I would certainly be consulting a lawyer upon returning to Australia.
Pedro The Fisherman
Roar Rookie
Yes but we can do without the sanctimonious mutterings of other convicted cheats such as Faf "Mine wasn't ball tampering but theirs was" DuPlessis!
Pedro The Fisherman
Roar Rookie
Yes they have lied! DuPlessis appealed the ball tampering decision as did Tendulkar.
Pedro The Fisherman
Roar Rookie
Didn't Faf mean to chew mints? Didn't Faf ,mean to vigorously rub his finger on the lolly itself? Wasn't that premeditated? Give me a break! Double standards.
Spoilt Brats
Guest
Maybe you're missing the culture perspective that is the bubble of CA - where CA gets us to focus on the puppets and not the management issue here. Lehmann is in this up to his eyeballs and thinks wearing glasses publicly for the first time in his life will give him some nobility and credibility. Give me a break - the India DRS? I suppose he knew nothing about that, the sugar in the pocket? - nothing either, the sledging? - never heard it happen before he'll say. BS! As for the worlds most gutless CEO Sutherland, I'm glad he's finally admitted to believing in the Easter Bunny and Santa. FFS! If an Australian Company made these representations they'd be suspended from the ASX with a please explain, and lets not forget the combined income for Smith, Warner and Lehmann would be more than many Australian small businesses. Keep them accountable for they are the public faces and major financial beneficiaries of a sport loved by a nation who pay money to make them wealthy. As for England, well that was expected as what should go wrong will always eventually go wrong.
Duncan Smith
Roar Guru
Why hysteria? Because the public reaction is way out of proportion to the importance of both the game of cricket and the offence within that game, while also ignoring comparable 'sins' like sledging and not-walking. To elaborate: 1. Cricket is not that important compared to far greater tragedies going on now e.g. world poverty, refugees, or the murder of South African farmers. 2. Smith did only a slightly worse version of what was done by Du Plessis, Atherton, Trescothick, etc but is being treated as if guilty of match-fixing, beam balls, and race-abuse all at once. (note airport scenes this morning). 3. When a batsman knowingly hits the ball and is caught behind, doesn't walk, and gets away with it, this is also blatant cheating. Yet neither this, or the foul practice known as sledging is punished, even though both are bad. As for people's ability to express opinions and have them heard, you may not be aware that Twitter, Youtube, Facebook are cracking down on free speech if it goes against the political narratives it favours and pushes. Cricket Australia should say to the public - 'yes, Smith did the wrong thing, but calm down and get some perspective.' Instead, they will pander to the 'stakeholders' as you call them.
Anthony Murnane
Roar Rookie
Ball tampering is a relatively low-grade offence according to the ICC, whose sanctions issued are largely in line with players sprung for tampering in the past. I continue to be fascinated by this sideshow, and I do not think the CA sanctions imposed are too harsh. I don't recall another governing body doing anything similar for incidents past. They've taken a stand and send a strong message, not just to our players, but world cricket that this behaviour and all that went on before and after it, will not be tolerated. Thanks for reading. If we all agreed all the time, what a boring world we would live in.
Nick
Roar Guru
People have got to stop comparing this to Faf, Afridi and especially Tendulkar. 1. Tendulkar was found innocent. 2. Afridi fessed up and didn't lie in a press conference. Secondly, his act was moronic and so obviously spontaneous. No one plans to bite the ball in a lunch break. 3. Faf fessed up to the zipper and the mint. He didn't deny it. His argument was that it was legal (and considering the English admitted to using mints in 05 and weren't punished, he had some merit in that thought) and on appeal found that to be incorrect. In fact, Faf's case made it explicitly clear that no foreign substance could be used, which makes the sandpaper idea even worse. None of the above then went to a press conference and the doubled down on a lie with an absurd story that no one was buying from minute one. They are beyond comparison. Stop comparing. And finally, and most importantly, CA is right not to give a toss about how another board punishes it's players. It is and always will be irrelevant. Did you stop to think maybe the other boards are wrong for being so lenient?
Anthony Murnane
Roar Rookie
Amen Paul. Spot on here from you. Perspective is a valuable weapon in these modern times.
Paul
Roar Guru
Let's put this into a bit of time perspective Anthony. The incident occurred last Sunday morning our time and it's taken till Wednesday our time for CA to get guys to South Africa, investigate the situation and announce penalties. That's pretty good going I reckon. Now Smith and co are back, it'll die down, then will be a one day wonder when the rest of the team get back, then after that, we'll be back to bashing each other's footy teams